


Solacium

by toffiendfee



Category: Initial D
Genre: Asexual Character, Asexuality Spectrum Takahashi Ryousuke, Blood and Injury, Domestic Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hospitals, Hurt/Comfort, I Say it's Slow Burn but it's actually more like Fast Burn that LOOKS like Slow Burn, M/M, Mutual Pining, No Incest, Pining, Polyamory, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-22
Updated: 2019-04-17
Packaged: 2019-07-15 09:03:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 23
Words: 55,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16059881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toffiendfee/pseuds/toffiendfee
Summary: A mysterious text message sets off a chain of events that nobody ever expected. When Takumi is attacked by a ruthless group of rivals, the three racers struggle with the aftermath. And precisely nothing is made easier by the feelings both Takahashi brothers realize they hold for their younger teammate...





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I was hit by the strong urge for a Hurt/Comfort fic. I don't know quite yet where to go with this. If you want me to continue writing, please leave a comment and tell me so! (Also tell me if I made any terrible grammar mistakes so I can correct them)
> 
> (I'm pretty sure caring Takahashi brothers are my kink or something.)

If Keisuke thought about it, he would say that this certain day had started quite harmlessly. He had been sleeping almost until noon, ate some leftovers for lunch and then made his way to the living room to watch some racing tapes. Really, it had all been quite peaceful until his brother came down the stairs, his phone in his hand and an inquiring expression on his face.

Not yet suspecting anything about what kind of turn the day would take beginning from now, Keisuke turned his head to look at Ryosuke questioningly and waited for him to explain why he had taken a break from studying instead of staying true to his intention of holing up in his room until dinner.

The younger one didn’t have to wait long for the explanation he desired. Ryosuke lifted the hand that held his phone. He studied his brother’s face for a moment and seemed to search for something in his expression before he finally started to talk, “I just got a message. It was sent by an unknown number and is pretty mysterious.”  
He crossed the room and approached his brother on the sofa, who turned fully around in order to look at the phone.

“Do you have any idea what this could mean?”

Ryosuke held the phone out to him and Keisuke read the displayed message with raised brows.

_time to get back your lap dog_

Underneath the words stood a string of a few letters and numbers, probably coordinates, Keisuke presumed. He shook his head and shrugged.  
“No clue.”

His brother took back the phone and looked at the display with furrowed brows. He looked slightly annoyed, which Keisuke concluded was because he couldn’t find out the reason behind the strange message. But did it even matter? Was it even that important?

Then again, it _was_ pretty weird. Sent by an unknown number, and to Ryosuke of all people, who didn’t exactly throw his private phone number around. Maybe whoever it was had gotten the wrong number by accident. 

But what if it actually was meant for his brother? Keisuke frowned, now also brooding over the mystery. The wording was strange. What exactly was meant by ‘your lap dog’? It probably wasn’t an actual dog. It sounded more like an insult, the kind of insult that Keisuke was very familiar with. And add to that the coordinates…  
Keisuke tensed abruptly as he was hit with some sort of epiphany. The insult that sounded so familiar… Who was Ryosuke’s ‘lap dog’? He was pretty sure that some bastards from some meaningless opposing team had called him “your brother’s attack dog” or something along the line once, but he was sitting right here and there was no need to ‘get him back’. 

Wait.

…Hadn’t Fujiwara been supposed to call this morning? Hadn’t Ryosuke been confused and annoyed because Fujiwara didn’t, and hadn’t he been unable to reach his fellow teammate? 

“ _Fuck!_ Aniki, show me that message again!”

Ryosuke frowned, but looked alarmed at his brother’s outburst nonetheless. Keisuke almost jerked the phone out of his hands and stared at the taunting words again. Then his eyes wandered to the letters and numbers that _most definitely_ were coordinates.  
“Where do those coordinates lead?” he asked urgently and pointed at the screen to underline his question. Ryosuke now looked increasingly unsettled, too. 

“It’s somewhere in the city’s north. We can easily find the exact spot with a map.”

Keisuke jumped to his feet and started rummaging through the bookshelves for a map of the city that he knew had to be there somewhere. Ryosuke, better versed in the landscapes of the living room, joined his efforts and found the desired object in less than five seconds.  
“I assumed the message was some kind of prank,” he mumbled while studying the map.

“Certainly not one of mine,” Keisuke asserted. He ran his hand through his blond hair in agitation and waited impatiently for his brother to find the correct place. “I think this is about Fujiwara,” he added when he realised that he hadn’t even mentioned the reason for his sudden outburst. But Ryosuke had seemingly made that connection himself already, as he only nodded curtly and threw the map on the coffee table.

“I know where the coordinates lead,” he called back over his shoulder, already halfway on his way towards the door and grabbing his car keys and coat. “We’ll take the FC.”

_____

The place that the coordinates described was an abandoned industrial area, and Keisuke would have snorted at how cliché and almost nostalgic this was if he hadn’t been so worried about what they might find inside. Ryosuke was just as apprehensive as him, evidenced by his silence and the tenseness in his posture and expression that he showed only when he was truly nervous, something that didn’t happen too often.

“We’ll search the main factory building first,” he stated in a way that didn’t allow for any objections. Not that Keisuke had any, because the large hall that his brother classified as the ‘main factory building’ also seemed to be the only structure in the area that didn’t look like it was one strong gust of wind away from collapsing. If they would find anything here, it would probably be in that building.

Whatever they would find here. ' _Maybe Fujiwara’s mangled corpse,_ ' Keisuke thought wryly before mentally reprimanding himself. Now was not the time for gallows humor, he could do that after Fujiwara had been found. 

Or maybe it _was_ just a stupid prank after all. If it was, Keisuke would _still_ make an effort to find the ones responsible for the message and kick their asses if only for making him worry for no reason. 

The lock on the rusty door looked like it had been broken by brute force long ago. Ryosuke shoved the door open with his foot, probably because he didn’t want to get any rust on his fingers. Keisuke almost scoffed at him because really, scared of a bit of rust when he had no problem being covered in grease and motor oil while working on the FC? But he shoved this notion aside, too, because he probably would have done the same thing. Maybe his brother also channelled his worry into anger sometimes and then let it out on unsuspecting rusty doors. 

He followed Ryosuke into the dimly-lit building. The afternoon sun shone through the broken windows and holes in the wall, illuminating rusty machinery that nobody had bothered to scrap after the factory had been closed. Ryosuke hesitated in his steps for a moment before turning towards the back part of the hall and purposefully striding in the direction of some old boilers.

“You heard something?”

“Yes,” the elder affirmed and Keisuke followed him hurriedly while keeping a close eye on their surroundings. He didn’t hear anything, but that wasn’t much of a surprise considering that he was the one of the two who liked to lock himself in his room and blast his eardrums with music when he got pissed. Old habits die hard, after all.

They had both reached the boilers by the time Keisuke was done with his musing. He almost bumped his head on some pipes that had broken off from their fastening and now hung askew between the aged machinery. Keisuke cursed quietly and ducked his head, trying to catch up with his brother who was a few steps ahead already. The area between the boilers was quite spacious if not for the rusty pipes everywhere. While Keisuke considered how much this looked like a perfect trap (he was familiar with those), Ryosuke had stopped dead in his tracks and he would have bumped into him if he hadn’t noticed in the last possible moment. Filled with dread, Keisuke stared in the same direction that his brother did.

The sight in front of them was horrifying, something that Keisuke thought despite having seen a fair amount of carnage back in the day. At the far end of the room, leaned against a wall, sat a crouched figure, unmoving and obviously unconscious. The guy’s hands were tied behind his back and fastened to one of the pipes that came down from the ceiling and disappeared into the concrete floor. His light brown hair was a mess and the strands covered his eyes in the slumped position he was placed in, but the large bruise on his cheek was still clearly visible. His bare arms were covered in bruises as well, and there was an especially nasty one on his torso, exposed under his shirt which was crumpled and slightly pushed upwards. But the most shocking sight weren’t the bruises. Someone had removed the man's shoes and socks and thrown them into a corner as they had obviously been in the way. Deep cuts looking like they had been inflected with a knife criss-crossed the soles of his bare feet, some of them still bleeding sluggishly.  
Keisuke inhaled sharply, and like it hadn’t been enough already, the sunlight filtering in through the broken window caught on a gleaming piece of metal: the silver buckle of a red leather dog collar, mockingly fastened around the young man’s neck.

_Lap dog._

It was like a spell had been broken, because the sounds of the world that Keisuke hadn’t even noticed leaving came rushing back. Ryosuke’s horrified “ _Fujiwara!_ ” cut through the air and before he fully realized it both of them were running towards their teammate and friend. “Fujiwara,” Ryosuke repeated and gingerly shook his shoulder, already kneeling on the dusty floor beside him.

Keisuke was numbed by a mixture of horror and blind fury that choked down the words in his throat before they could fully form. He sank down next to Fujiwara and found himself fumbling with the buckle of the accursed collar, wanting to get rid of the fucking thing as fast as possible and failing because his hands shook too much. His brother was still trying to wake Fujiwara up, and finally Keisuke succeeded in his quest and moved on to the rope around his friend’s wrists, cursing at the knot that simply wouldn’t budge. Then he remembered that he had his pocket knife with him and he used that to cut through the sturdy bindings while Ryosuke had given up on trying to stir Fujiwara from his unconsciousness and moved on to examining his numerous injuries.

The knife sliced through the last fiber and his friend’s hands were freed. “Oi. Fujiwara,” Keisuke attempted to continue where his brother had left off, but it was no use. Ryosuke rose to his feet abruptly, prompting the younger Takahashi to do the same. 

“We need to get him to a hospital. He might have a broken rib and those cuts need to be disinfected.” Ryosuke’s voice was firm, a stark contrast to his unnaturally troubled expression. Keisuke nodded and avoided looking at Fujiwara because he felt the rage engulfing him and starting to sabotage every reasonable thought. What had happened here, he needed to find out about it, he needed to make someone _pay_ …

His brother’s voice tore through his thoughts of revenge. “Help me carry him,” Ryosuke requested and Keisuke nodded before springing into action. Revenge wasn’t the first priority now.

First, they needed to get Fujiwara treated.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ANGST ANGST ANGST

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A shorter chapter, but a fast update! Gotta ride this wave of motivation as long as it lasts.
> 
> I can't guarantee for accurate depictions of hospital procedures because I'm one of the lucky people who very rarely had to ever set foot in one. However, I do know that concussions and being knocked out work differently in real life, but this is fiction for a reason. Sometimes you just need that convenient Hollywood unconsciousness.
> 
> As always: please consider leaving your thoughts in a comment, it will keep my spirits up and keep me motivated! (Also I won't bite if you have constructive criticism)

Ryosuke took a deep breath and exhaled it sharply, feeling a strong need for a cigarette. But you didn’t smoke in hospitals, which applied to patients as well as doctors as well as _aspiring_ doctors and street racers waiting for an injured friend to wake up.

He had been told that Fujiwara had been awake briefly during the examination and gladly accepted the painkillers he had been given before succumbing to his exhaustion again. The elder of the Takahashi brothers felt frustration at not being allowed in the room during the process, but he wasn’t a relative and this wasn’t his father’s hospital. He had been forced to wait until Fujiwara was brought to a room where he would stay until he woke up and could be questioned. Instead of staying motionless, Ryosuke had used the time to call Fujiwara’s father and inform him what was happening. He wasn’t quite able to figure out the man who had raised his downhill ace. Talking to Fujiwara senior definitely demonstrated where his son got his taciturn nature from. The man hadn’t actually uttered much besides a grunt of understanding here and there and noncommittal plans to “maybe show up sometime in the evening after the shop closed”. If Ryosuke had expected Fujiwara’s father to immediately rush to the hospital to check on his son, he had been mistaken.

Ryosuke rubbed the bridge of his nose; the stress was getting to him. He mentally ran over the things that the doctor had told him; it repeated over and over in his head.

Punched in the face, a bloodied nose. Kicked in the stomach. The soles of his feet sliced open. A cracked rib. A light concussion. Heavy bruising more or less everywhere on his body, but fortunately no injuries to his internal organs. Still, Fujiwara would be in a lot of pain once he woke up. 

His glance wandered from Fujiwara in the hospital bed over to Keisuke, who was waiting together with him. Well, “waiting” wasn’t really the correct term. His brother was pacing around the room restlessly, seeming like he was about to cry in one moment and looking ready to commit murder in the next. He still wasn’t able to calm down, the memory of finding Fujiwara in the factory building being at the forefront of his mind.

“Wake _up_ already,” Keisuke snapped at no one in particular, because he was aware that Fujiwara couldn’t hear him either way. Another long moment of silence passed, then turned towards his brother, helplessly. 

“He took quite the amount of damage, right…?” 

Ryosuke’s mind started wandering upon hearing Keisuke’s tentative question and he couldn’t help resuming the list again: Concussion. Bruises. Feet cut up…

“He certainly won’t be able to drive for a while,” Ryosuke answered truthfully, neither wanting to directly confirm nor directly deny it for the moment. 

At that, Keisuke flamed up like a fuse. “As if _that’s_ our biggest problem right now! Look at him! Look at what _happened_ to him!” Anger flaring in his eyes, he gestured wildly at the pale figure in the hospital bed. “We don’t even know yet what exactly happened, and how it could happen, and _why_ the fuck it happened, and you’re thinking about the Project already!?”

Keisuke knew exactly that the statement hadn’t been meant like that, but if he needed to let off some steam right now, Ryosuke would humor him. It had been a harsh afternoon for the both of them. 

But his little brother had exhausted his anger already by the looks of it, instead of continuing to shout at him now collapsing into one of the notoriously uncomfortable hospital chairs and running his hand through his hair.

“I just… I don’t understand…” 

He sounded so defeated that Ryosuke felt his chest ache. No, he didn’t understand it either. Yet. But he would do everything in his power to figure out this situation, and he already had a few steps of a new plan formulated in his head.

_____

Now that he was sitting down, Keisuke found that he couldn’t stop staring at Fujiwara. His friend’s head was resting on a clean white pillow. Sometimes his eyelids twitched in his sleep and Keisuke watched with bated breath if he would wake up, but until now the most that had happened was his body stirring a little and then stilling again.

Fujiwara looked so peaceful in his sleep, but Keisuke knew it to be an illusion. 

Sitting there doing nothing felt wrong somehow, so he dared to reach out and grasp his friend’s hand with his own, careful not to stir him and not caring that Ryosuke was still in the room to judge him for this action. His brother didn’t seem very keen on leaving either for all his talk about Fujiwara’s injuries fortunately not being too severe.  
Keisuke let his thumb brush lightly over his teammate’s bruised knuckles. “He put up quite a fight by the looks of it,” he said quietly. 

“He didn’t have much of a chance if he was outnumbered,” Ryosuke supplied.

Keisuke nodded, of course Fujiwara had been outnumbered. The whole thing didn’t look like it had been executed by one person alone. He knew what it looked like when several people ganged up on some unfortunate victim. 

He glanced at the angry bruise on Fujiwara’s jaw again, the other ones being covered by a stark white blanket. If it wasn’t for the bruise, Fujiwara did actually look like he was just sleeping peacefully. Keisuke felt his shoulders drop from their tense, angry position. All of this seemed so _pointless_.

“I still don’t understand why they would have done this. What did Fujiwara ever do to them to deserve this?”

Ryosuke stayed quiet for a while and Keisuke stopped waiting for an answer, but eventually his brother seemed to have one for him.

“This was never about Fujiwara.”

“Huh?”

“Fujiwara hasn’t done anything. It was us who they wanted to hurt with this. They attacked him because they knew how valuable he is and assumed that he was an easier target than either of us.”

His brother’s face was twisted in a tight-lipped expression of disdain (the one that Keisuke hated so much because it bore an eerie resemblance to their father when he expressed his disapproval). What he said made sense, of course it did. The macabre, degrading display that Fujiwara had been left in was nothing more than a presentation set up especially for the two of them to see. Fujiwara wasn’t meant to be the primary target, no, he was merely a plaything for those bastards to attack them for whatever reason they had thought this was justified for. 

“So… they beat him up and put him in a fucking _dog collar_ just so they could have a go at us?” Keisuke felt the white-hot fury rising in him again. He almost started crushing Fujiwara’s hand, which he still held onto, and tried to relax before he did something drastic. Like using this stupid uncomfortable chair to bash in the window or something. 

“It seems so,” Ryosuke confirmed in a calm tone, his eyes betraying his true emotions. If his assumption was true, their friend and teammate had to suffer and be humiliated just because someone was too much of a _coward_ to confront the two of them directly. Keisuke only hoped that Fujiwara had passed out before he could learn about those bastards’ true intentions. He was still fuming, but also pretty sure that he had himself under control again for now. He sighed, a sound that came out sounding more like a scoff.

“Let’s not tell him about the lap dog thing.”

“Agreed.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a lot to unpack here, but let's just see how the story unfolds! I'm making this up as I go, which isn't the best way of writing anything, but this is how I work right now. I hope you liked it and continue being interested in this story!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Unfortunately for everyone involved, Takumi already knows. 
> 
> Keisuke, on the other hand, still hasn't regained any of his chill and also comes very close to an important realisation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, here we go again! I have come to the conclusion that I can't keep up a regular posting schedule. I don't have much energy lately, BUT. For the record, this story will not be abandoned unless I state otherwise! (Which will not happen anywhere in the near future because I love writing it as it is SO self-indulgent.) Just if any of you were wondering!

It was almost dark outside when the pale figure in the hospital bed finally awoke from his deep slumber. Neither Keisuke nor Ryosuke noticed at first, both still sitting in their respective uncomfortable chairs and each being deeply lost in their own thoughts.

Takumi blinked into the harsh, white light of the lamp on the ceiling and closed his eyes again because the sudden brightness stung and made his eyes tear up. He gave it another attempt and groaned because it had the same effect.

Just who had the _bright_ idea to install lamps like that?

But his quiet groan had finally alerted the other two persons in the room to his state of consciousness, and Takumi soon found that a large shadow in form of a person blocked his view of the lamp; and now that the light didn’t shine directly into his eyes anymore, he could identify that person as Takahashi Ryosuke. 

Takumi frowned. Where was he again?

“Finally!” someone almost-shouted and Takumi blinked, still drowsy from his sleep. That had been Keisuke’s voice. Now that he turned his head a little, he realized that there were indeed _two_ person-shaped shadows crowded around the bed he was lying in, and that the second one belonged to the younger of the two brothers. 

Just what had happened? This was a hospital, right? Why was he in a hospital?

“How are you feeling, Fujiwara?” 

Now it was Ryosuke addressing him. The question seemed to be justified, as now Takumi noticed the dull pain that seemed to engulf his entire body and that only got more intense with every passing second now that he had acknowledged it. The face he pulled must have been answer enough, because a glass of water was quickly offered to him. Takumi gratefully accepted it and took a big gulp. He almost asked what had happened to land him here, but he had the feeling that he was very close to remembering by himself. 

Oh, _right._

There had been… a fight? Yeah, a fight. He was so stupid, he really ended up at a hospital for getting into a fight. It hadn’t been his fault though. Takumi realized that much now that more and more of his memories were returning. Still, why were the Takahashi brothers here? Damn, they must really think he’s pathetic for not being able to defend himself well enough. But there had been five against him alone, maybe he should mention that?

Takumi’s mind was going haywire. He must have passed out eventually, but how did he get here? Why were his feet in bandages? Why…

_‘Well, well, if it isn’t the Takahashis’ little lap dog.’_

Takumi’s eyes widened as he remembered.

_Walking home from Itsuki’s place. Suddenly being cornered by this group of people he didn’t recognise. Their leader sneering at him._

He had been more annoyed than intimidated, honestly. The intimidation had come belatedly, when he had caught one blow to the head already and his vision started swimming, and when he saw the fist being raised for a second hit. 

“Fujiwara, I need to know what happened.”

Ryosuke’s voice broke him out of his reverie, firm as ever. His brother stood next to him, crossing his arms and glaring: An obvious nonverbal “I want to know, too”.

_‘Watch out, or the little puppy will run right back to its owners!’ Raunchy laughter in his ears before a punch meets his stomach._

Takumi felt nauseous, and not just from the pain he was in. His fingers clenched the bedsheets and he turned his head to stare at the wall. “I’m sorry.”

“Why are you saying that? You didn’t _start_ it, did you?” Keisuke bristled. Takumi winced at the anger and annoyance in his voice.

“Calm down, Keisuke,” Ryosuke admonished sharply, “we need to let Fujiwara talk for himself.” Keisuke shot his brother a dirty glare, but kept his mouth shut.

Takumi looked away again, hating the atmosphere in the room. Both brothers were annoyed with him, he could tell, but he really didn’t want to talk about what happened. Especially not to them. The humiliation still sat too deep.  
But Takumi also knew that he couldn’t keep it a secret, and that his teammates needed and deserved to know what had incapacitated him.

“I’m sorry,” Takumi repeated, “there were five of them. I wasn’t prepared for something like that. I must have passed out at some point.” He paused for a moment, but none of the two said anything. They just listened, so Takumi continued. “I don’t know what happened. I don’t know how I got here.” Seeking an answer to his questions, he dared to look at Ryosuke, who stared back at him with an unreadable expression on his face. 

“It was us who brought you here,” he finally said, and Takumi felt hot and cold waves of terror wash through him at the realisation that they must have found him unconscious and drove him to the hospital. How did they locate him, anyway? 

But some questions were more important than others. Takumi shifted in his bed slightly and winced at the resulting jolt of pain.  
“Ryosuke-san, why are my feet in bandages?” he asked, somehow able to keep his voice amazingly steady.

He saw the brothers exchange a quick glance, which didn’t ease his nervousness. 

“Fujiwara-“ Ryosuke began, but quickly got interrupted by his brother who seemingly had no patience for delivering the news gently at this point. “It’s because these bastards didn’t just beat you up, no, they also decided to cut up your feet. That’s why we need to know _who they were._ If you have any idea, _tell us.”_

Disbelief. His first reaction to this news was confused disbelief that then slowly but surely turned into horror.

_How...? Why…?_

A deep shiver ran through his body; he wasn’t sure if he should be glad that he had been unconscious, no, he felt terror at not knowing about everything that had happened to him while he was out.

Someone called his name and tore him from his thoughts. It was Keisuke this time. “I promise they will regret this. Whoever they are, we will make them regret this.”  
Takumi kept his gaze pinned to his hands that he didn’t even notice clinging to the blanket in a vice-like grip. He didn’t even have the energy to be angry right now. He didn’t know what was happening anymore. It all seemed so surreal, like a dream he would wake up from slightly disturbed, but that he would forget about a few minutes later. Keisuke and Ryosuke were behaving in a way that Takumi just couldn’t wrap his head around. Maybe this all was still the aftermath of him being hit on the head two times too many. 

“Keisuke might have a been rash, but he is right,” Ryosuke raised his voice, effectively interrupting his brother’s rage before it could boil over. Takumi shook his head faintly; when he tried to remember any of his attacker’s faces, his memories seemed to be clouded in fog. They all melted together into cruel smirks and gloating sneers and nothing tangible at all. 

“I’d have to see them to describe them,” he told Ryosuke and saw him nodding thoughtfully out of the corner of his eye.

“Did they say anything that could be a hint?”

_Takahashis’ lap dog_

“No,” Takumi said. 

_____

Keisuke watched Fujiwara intently. He didn’t like the way their younger teammate avoided looking at them; it left an uncomfortable feeling in his guts. Fujiwara looked so nervous, which was wrong in itself. Fujiwara just didn’t get nervous (or didn’t show it at least). No matter how big the pressure before a race got: when Keisuke looked at his teammate, he would only see his usual expression with a touch of concentration. No nervousness anywhere.

Now, with Fujiwara refusing to meet their eyes and generally behaving very, well, _twitchy_ , Keisuke felt his own restlessness going off the rails. He balled his hands into fists and relaxed them, again and again and again until Ryosuke laid a calming hand on his shoulder. How could his brother even stay so calm?

Some part of Keisuke had been convinced that everything would end up being just fine when Fujiwara woke up, but that wasn’t the case, not at all. Looking at Fujiwara acting like that made him feel sick. He was sure that Ryosuke must feel something similar.

As if on cue, his brother’s hand left his shoulder. Ryosuke needed it to rub his temples, frowning like he often did when he felt forced to say something uncomfortable. He opened his eyes again and looked in Fujiwara’s direction. Their teammate still stared at the windowsill like it was the most interesting thing in the world. Keisuke waited anxiously what his brother was going to say.

“I’ll have to call Fumihiro and tell him to cancel our next expedition.”

_Ouch._ That definitely met his definition of “uncomfortable.” He wasn't exactly convinced that this was the right topic at the right time.

As if on cue, Fujiwara shot up in his bed (accompanied by only a slight visible wince, much to Keisuke’s awe) and stared at Ryosuke, completely appalled.

“What? No! I’ll be fine until then!” he assured. “There’s no need to cancel; I can race!”

Keisuke thought he must have heard that wrong. “I _hope_ that was supposed to be a joke,” he said sternly, and finally Fujiwara looked at him, too. “But-“

“No buts, Fujiwara,” Ryosuke declared with finality in his voice. “You can’t and won’t drive in this condition. We will postpone the race until you are fully recovered.”

Keisuke almost laughed because now Fujiwara looked downright _betrayed._ In fact, he looked absolutely miserable. If he hadn’t witnessed it himself, Keisuke wouldn’t believe that this was the same guy who vehemently denied being a racer and was completely unwilling to participate in the sport not too long ago. The change his teammate had gone through was truly amazing, Keisuke thought.

“If we have to,” the younger grumbled and now Keisuke actually let out an amused little snort. This sounded more like the Fujiwara he knew. Someone who made his own way and didn’t like being shoved around.

Keisuke decided that he definitely liked this Fujiwara much more. He blinked, then, because he had never thought about it like this before, but yes, he guessed that he did like Fujiwara. It was nice to have him around and talk to him. He enjoyed his company and greatly respected him as a fellow racer, too. Fujiwara was unique.

He decided not to dwell on it for now as he watched his friend sink back into the pillow in defeat. Another forceful wave of deep sympathy washed through him as he thought about the disappointment and shame he must feel. He knew how that felt.

_‘I might not know who did this yet, but lord have mercy on them when I find them.’_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I changed the summary because the old one seemed to me like it was sending a wrong message. I also hope this chapter doesn't seem too chopped off, because I was rather tired when I finished writing.
> 
> By the way: Yes, I said that writing Ryosuke is hard. You know what is even harder? Writing Takumi.
> 
> And a last fun fact for today: I’ve slowly started building a Keisuke/Takumi playlist in my head with songs that I associate with the pairing for some reason. It includes two songs so far and both of them happen to be in German.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> …in which Bunta finally makes his appearance and Ryosuke starts setting things up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll attempt to post a new chapter at least every other week from now on. I can't guarantee anything, but that's my goal at the moment!

“Fujiwara, your father is here to see you.”

Startled out of his thoughts, Takumi turned his head towards the open door to his hospital room, where he saw Ryosuke standing. He glanced at the clock on the wall, realising that it was already well past the opening hours of the tofu shop. Time had been passing fast with both Takahashi brothers keeping him company after they had accepted that they wouldn’t get much information about this morning’s events for now. Takumi knew that he had merely delayed the conversation he dreaded.

So now he would have to shake his old man off, too. Great. Just what he needed. 

Takumi sighed heavily as Ryosuke stepped aside and held the door for Fujiwara Bunta, who grunted his thanks and stepped into the room. Takumi didn’t miss Ryosuke’s long look as he closed the door behind him.

Bunta stood in front of the bed and gave his son a once-over, his expression not changing in the slightest. Both men were silent for a while, until Takumi had enough. 

“Aren’t you going to say anything, old man?” If he was going to get scolded for getting injured, his father could just stop standing there and get it over with. Takumi was getting annoyed fast. 

“What do you expect me to say, huh? You think I’m going to tell you something about not getting into a fight or something? I could, but I’m not going to. The damage is done already.”

“So why are you here then if _not_ for not telling me what you just told me anyway?”

Bunta huffed. “Stop being a smartass, that won’t help anything. I wonder where you got that from.”

“Yeah, wonder,” Takumi grumbled.

Silence reigned again, and Bunta would have probably used it to take a drag of his cigarette or a swig of sake if they weren’t at a hospital right now. 

“How are you feeling?” he finally asked, startling Takumi. He searched for any sign of hidden intentions behind the question in his father’s expression, but found none.

“Not good,” Takumi answered hesitantly, but truthfully. He felt the need to add something, so he said what he thought Bunta wanted to know: “I won’t be able to do the delivery tomorrow.”

“I can see that, idiot.” 

Takumi closed his mouth dejectedly and looked down at the white blanket. He heard his father sigh deeply. “I’m not angry at you. Not much, at least. What exactly happened, anyway?” 

But Takumi just shook his head. There was no way he’d tell his old man. Absolutely no way.

Still, he felt less ashamed about getting beaten up and more ashamed about burdening his teammates and his father with this situation. He still hated doing the deliveries, but he felt bad anyway about not helping the old man with the business. And then there were the hospital bills to consider, _dear God_ , the hospital bills… 

His father said something, but he only caught it with half an ear. “Well, if you ever do consider telling me, I’m listening.”

“I’m sorry, dad,” Takumi mumbled, eyes glued elsewhere than the other’s expression just like before when he talked with the Takahashi brothers.

“Hmph. Just get well soon.” Bunta walked over to the bed and ruffled his son’s hair. Takumi scoffed and shoved away his hand, but a little smile stole itself onto his face. “Will do,” he assured quietly. 

His father let out a short breath that sounded like a laugh, before glancing at the clock on the wall. “Well then, I’m going to leave now. I’ve still got work to do today.”

“Great. Thanks,” Takumi answered flatly.

_‘Sure. You’re probably just going to go to a bar and get drunk as you usually do when you tell me that.’_

Bunta frowned. “Oi, you brat. I had to close the shop early to come here. You should be a bit more thankful.”

“Sure, sure, old man. Now leave, I’m tired.”

“Ungrateful brat. Who raised you?”

Takumi shook his head and groaned. Had he looked at Bunta, he would have seen the fond grin on his face. Instead, Takumi let his head fall back into the pillow (a decision he quickly regretted as it made him feel slightly dizzy) and closed his eyes. “I _am_ tired though, shitty old man.”

“Fine. I’m going to leave my idiot of a son so that he can waste everyone’s time by sleeping. I hope you’ll enjoy it.”

_“Go away,”_ Takumi mumbled into the pillow.

“I’m leaving,” was the answer and Takumi raised his head slightly to watch his father walk towards the door. Before he finally left him alone though, Bunta turned around one last time. 

“Don’t let them coddle you too much,” he uttered, indicating who exactly he meant with a short nod in the direction of the hallway.

Takumi peered at him with furrowed brows. “What are you talking about, shitty old man?”

But much to his son’s annoyance, Bunta didn’t give any further reaction. With a poor indication of a wave he was out of the door, leaving behind a thoughtful and disgruntled Takumi.

_____

While the two members of the Fujiwara family were having their talk, Ryosuke was waiting outside the room, restless. With his arms crossed and the slightest frown on his face, he was staring at the door handle like it held the answers to all the questions in the world. In his mind, he was calculating the most sensible next steps to resolve the situation with the best possible outcome. None of the persons passing him in the corridor tried to interrupt him in his musing.

Keisuke had excused himself and left to get something to eat for them, and Ryosuke hoped he wouldn’t return until the two inside the room were finished talking and he got the chance to exchange a few words with Fujiwara senior privately.

Fujiwara needed to be kept out of the spotlight for a bit until he had enough time to heal. Physically, and, if needed, mentally. The corners of his mouth twisted with discontent at the thought. It was a point of utmost importance that he, unfortunately, did not have all that much experience with. He worried about Keisuke and his way of dealing with the situation, wishing he could trust his brother to not accidentally make everything worse when his mouth went off faster than his mind again.

The fact that Fujiwara couldn’t – or wouldn’t – talk about what happened frustrated Ryosuke greatly. The ones responsible needed to be dealt with as soon as possible for the sake of everyone’s peace of mind, and Fujiwara needed time to heal. 

Ryosuke didn’t doubt that he himself was best suited to take care of that. Now to convince Fujiwara senior.

As if on cue, Takumi’s father stepped out of the room and closed the door quietly behind him, acknowledging Ryosuke’s presence with only a curt nod. Before he could walk away, Ryosuke intercepted and asked, bowing politely, “Fujiwara-san, may I have a minute?”

Fujiwara Bunta stopped in his tracks and turned around to face him. Ryosuke waited for an answer while both of them were silently sizing each other up. Apparently neither of them knew quite what to make of the other, knowing only that Fujiwara Takumi held some sort of relevance for them both.

“Yeah, I’m listening,” Fujiwara senior finally said and Ryosuke gave him a polite smile.  
“Thank you, Fujiwara-san. I will make sure not to waste too much of your time.”

The other raised an eyebrow. “You’re one of those Takahashi kids, I assume. If you don’t want to waste my time, do get to the point, kid.”

Ryosuke chuckled at that, it had been a while since someone had called him ‘kid’. Fujiwara Bunta’s statement had convinced him that the other knew exactly who he was. That man didn’t seem like it on first glance, but he definitely did keep an eye on what his son was doing. Ryosuke had to admit that he was curious about the man who taught his downhill ace the way that he drove, but that curiosity would have to wait until a later point.

“I wanted to talk about a few things regarding this current situation. I apologise for what has happened, Fujiwara-san.” Deciding to fulfil the other’s wish and get straight to the point, he added, “I will take the responsibility for the situation and make sure you won’t have any unplanned expenses.”

Fujiwara Bunta frowned at that and regarded him with a sharp look. “What I’m getting from that, kid, is that you’re offering to pay the bills. Very noble of you, but I don’t get why that shouldn’t be _my_ job, Takahashi _-kun._ ”

It would have been impossible for even the densest individual to miss the suspiciousness in the statement. “I’m sorry I haven’t expressed myself clearly enough, Fujiwara-san. This is simply part of my responsibility as a team leader, nothing else. You have my word.” Ryosuke felt inclined to bow again and felt the other peer at him.

“I was under the impression that this didn’t have anything to do with your team,” Fujiwara senior stated, squinting at Ryosuke.

Under the other’s scrutiny, Ryosuke closed his eyes for just a second and admitted, “I’m afraid to say it does.”

“Ah.” Takumi’s father didn’t show surprise, if he felt any. Under his breath, he muttered something that sounded like “kids these days…”  
“Fine then, kid. I’ll leave this to you. I generally don’t care what my son does in his free time. It’s his fault when he gets caught up in things like this. But when someone like you decides to take responsibility for it, there must be more behind it. Isn’t there?” 

He took Ryosuke’s startled expression as an answer, apparently, because he continued without waiting for a verbal affirmation, “Takumi can choose to spend his time with whoever he wants. Doesn’t have to mean that I like what happens.”

Ryosuke swallowed at the accusation he believed to hear in the other’s statement. Fujiwara Bunta _did_ care, despite his initial impression. That didn’t stop him from thinking his next request would be justified, but it made him hesitant about how to best voice it to ensure it would be granted.

He didn’t have much time to think about it as his teammate’s father asked, “That wasn’t all though, was it? Continue with what you were meaning to tell me.”

“Before I do, I once again have to apologise for what has happened. It shouldn’t have been allowed to happen and it is me who shouldn’t have allowed it. Forgive me if I seem impudent, but I do have one more request. I would like for you to allow your son to stay with me and my brother for a short duration once he gets discharged from the hospital. I’m sure you understand my intention to resolve this situation as fast as possible and keep an eye on my ace driver’s recovery. He has told me that he helps you delivering tofu in the morning, is that correct? I’m sure me or my brother could take over the deliveries as long as Takumi isn’t able to.” Ryosuke internally recoiled as soon as he noticed his little slip-up of calling Takumi by his first name, but Fujiwara Bunta didn’t mention his faux pas. 

“You have a way with words,” he grumbled under his breath before continuing loudly, “Don’t worry about the deliveries, kid. As for the other part: I told you that I don’t care what Takumi does in his free time. Convince him, not me.”

Ryosuke let out a breath he didn’t realise he was holding. “I will do that. Thank you very much, Fujiwara-san,” he said, hiding his satisfaction and bowing deeply. 

“If that was all, I’m going to leave now. I’ve got work to do.”

“Of course, Fujiwara-san. I’m sorry to have bothered you.”

Takumi’s father brushed the apology aside. “Take care, Takahashi Ryosuke.” He made to leave before calling back over his shoulder, “Keep me updated when something happens. I believe you have the shop’s number.”

Ryosuke didn’t miss the implication and nodded, filled with new respect for the man. “Of course.”

A nod in return, and then Fujiwara Bunta was gone.

Ryosuke allowed himself to smile. 

_First step successful._


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keisuke acts in confusing ways and there's more angst.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I said "at least every other week", but I doubt that anyone's disappointed about me being a bit faster than that with this chapter. I was on a roll and I hope it's not visible in a way too adventurous writing style (because that happens when I'm on a roll and also tired.) If you spot any formulation that crosses the fine line between "stylized" and "weird", please tell me!

Takumi didn’t sleep well in that night, no wonder considering that his injuries made it impossible to find a comfortable sleeping position. Add to that the thoughts running rampant in his head and you got the perfect recipe for insomnia on your hand. 

He was almost glad when morning came and the world outside his window bustled to life. Takumi was exhausted and drowsy and felt even more miserable than the day before. He sullenly endured the nurse and doctor checking on him and the measly breakfast he was served even though he was too tired to actually feel hungry. He forced down the sticky rice anyway because he felt it wasn’t worth arguing over with the nurse. 

The calm after everyone left his room didn’t last long, though. It seemed like the Takahashi brothers were adamant on using the visiting hours to their full capacity, as the first thing to enter his room after the rest of his breakfast had left it was a slightly bleary-eyed Keisuke. 

_'Huh. It almost looks like I wasn’t the only one who didn’t get enough sleep last night.'_

Takumi instantly wondered where Ryosuke was when he realised that his team leader wasn’t following right behind his younger brother. He didn’t want to ask though. Even if he had wanted to, Keisuke wouldn’t have given him the opportunity. For how tired he looked, he seemed to have lost none of his energy from yesterday. He narrowed his eyes at Takumi.  
“You look like shit.”

_'Gee, thanks. I wouldn’t have thought.'_

Takumi shrugged, watching the other’s frown deepen before his expression softened and he sighed. “How are you feeling?”

“Exactly the way I look,” Takumi answered dryly, having grown tired of being asked that question. To his surprise, Keisuke didn’t retort and instead chose to sit down in a chair and stare out of the window, seemingly in deep thought. There went Takumi’s hopes of being left alone again soon. He had assumed that Keisuke was here to check on him and then go home to report back to Ryosuke. 

Which reminded him about the elder’s absence again, and this time he dared to ask. 

“He’s at home, getting the guest room ready,” Keisuke replied, shrugging.

“You’re expecting guests?” Now Takumi wondered even more why Keisuke was sticking around. Didn’t that mean both of the brothers should be preparing for that visit?

Keisuke stared at him impatiently. “Yes. You, you idiot.”

_'What?'_

Only when the other furrowed his brows in confusion did Takumi realise that he had asked his incredulous question out loud.

“He didn’t tell you?”

Takumi shook his head, both confused and slightly shocked.

Keisuke cursed under his breath. “That prick.” Before Takumi got a chance ask why he was supposed to stay at the two brothers’ place when he had planned to just go home after being released from the hospital, Keisuke spoke up again.

“Sorry about that. I thought you knew about it already. He told me that he talked to your father and that he wants you to stay with us for a little while.” He looked strangely apologetic, which Takumi thought didn’t fit him at all. 

“Why?” 

Of course his stupid old man was only too glad to get rid of him for as long as he was incapacitated. It’s not like he could be of much help in the household like this. And now he didn’t have much of a choice if his old man already agreed. It must be some sort of conspiracy against him, Takumi was certain. 

_Shitty old man._

But why would Ryosuke want to do something like that?

Keisuke ran his fingers through his bleached blond hair, a gesture that Takumi had seen from him unusually often lately. “Well, he wants to keep an eye on your recovery or something. Driving all the way from here to Shibukawa every time would make that unnecessarily difficult.”

Unfortunately, that last part made sense to Takumi. Ryosuke probably knew exactly what to do and it was only natural that he wanted his downhill driver back on track as soon as possible. Still, wasn’t that a bit disproportionate? Takumi knew that his mentor was a very busy person, with him studying to become a doctor while also being the leader of Project D at the same time… 

Takumi didn’t want to be another burden to him, after he had been so generous to offer him a spot on his team and mentor him to give him the opportunity to ever improve as a driver.

“Does he- um, does he really want to do that? I’m sure it’s not necessary, I can-“

At that, Keisuke interrupted him resolutely. “Of course he does. Why else would he insist you stay at our home?”

Takumi looked at his hands. “…And you? What about you?” he asked quietly, unable to meet his teammate’s eyes.

Keisuke was always so tense and angry, especially around Takumi. The latter was almost sure that the blond wasn’t exactly thrilled at his brother’s idea, which would force him to spend more time around Takumi, too. Wouldn’t he just be intruding?

Sometimes he got the feeling that Keisuke couldn’t stand him and tolerated his presence only for his brother’s sake. At other times Takumi almost believed to feel some kind of truce between them, when they were talking about their next opponents or when Keisuke took the time to explain something about his car. It was not quite friendship, more like comradery and a silent pact that they both would race to their best capabilities and help bring Ryosuke’s dream to life.

Still, Takumi had always been a bit hesitant to talk to Keisuke. Takumi had never been a person who talked much, especially to people that weren’t close friends to him, but the younger Takahashi seemed just as unapproachable as his older brother. Both of them were people that Takumi admired greatly and constantly struggled to keep up with, feeling like he could never quite reach their standards. Keisuke was supposed to be his teammate, his fellow ace driver, but seeing him improve as rapidly as he had in the course of a few months made Takumi fear that he’d be left behind soon, seeing only the back lights of the FD disappearing around a corner, right out of his reach.

However, his glum thoughts were pushed aside when Keisuke said something unexpected next.

“To be honest, I’d like you to stay too.”

Takumi couldn’t believe his ears, despite hoping that he’d heard right. Glancing at the blond, he saw the lopsided and somewhat agonized smile on the other’s face, looking a bit like he couldn’t quite believe himself that he had just said that.

“…You’d like me to stay, too?” Takumi parroted slowly, uncertainly.

“Yeah,” Keisuke affirmed, now looking angry for some reason. Then he stood up, so abruptly that it startled Takumi, and raised his voice, “Look– I’m… _worried_ about you, okay?!”

“You don’t need to-“ Takumi began, but his teammate interrupted him once again, “I _know_ that! I thought I did, anyway. And yet here we are, you laying in a hospital bed and-“ Keisuke trailed off and there it was again: him running his fingers through his hair, a gesture that Takumi knew now must signify stress and feelings of helplessness.

“We _want_ to do this, Fujiwara. You’re not forcing us to react like this or anything. That’s _bullshit._ ”

He had walked over to Takumi now, his knuckles white from his tight grip on the metal poles of the bedframe. The brown-haired one stared at him with wide eyes over his outbreak, and his expression didn’t relax even as Keisuke’s voice went quieter again, now more strained than angry. 

“Please let us take care of you. Both of us, not just aniki. Don’t think he’s the only one who knows that this,” he gestured vaguely at Takumi’s injuries hidden under the blanket, “is his fault in a way and wants to see you recover-“

“This is not your fault in any way, it’s my fault alone-“

 _“Stop saying that!”_ Keisuke failed to keep his voice down and winced a little when he heard it echo through the small room. “Stop blaming yourself, Fujiwara. I don’t want to hear anymore of it. How could it be _your_ fault? If anyone else is to blame other than these fucking assholes who did this, then it’s _us_. ‘Kay?”

Takumi gave him a long look, unsuccessfully trying to comprehend what was happening.  
“I don’t understand you, Keisuke-san,” he finally said, seeing how the other’s shoulders slumped upon hearing it.

“I don’t understand you either, Fujiwara,” Keisuke replied quietly.

He walked back over to the chair in the corner and sat down, looking like he was fighting with the urge to say something else. But instead, both of them stayed quiet until the nurse appeared again and shooed Keisuke out of the room with a comment about visiting time being over for now. Takumi stared at the back of his retreating head, feeling unreasonably disappointed when he closed the door behind him without a look back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm still winging it, but I have some kind of idea where I'm going, or rather: which stations I want to pass on the way there.  
> I hope you like this chapter! I, for my part, really enjoy writing Keisuke. And I enjoy writing angst. This chapter was fun.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keisuke really tries his best, Ryosuke worries, and Takumi catches the FeelingsTM.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly I'm a bit impressed with myself because I'm actually keeping up a weekly updating schedule. I usually don't do well with that. But here we go; a new chapter that almost brought tears to my eyes while writing. Tears of "ohmygawdsoadorableiamwritingthisrightnow?!", so don't be too concerned. I'm just being very sappy for my standards. 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy! If you can, leave me in a comment what you're thinking!

When Keisuke left the building through the front door, he registered how the air was unusually cool for this time of the year and he was glad that he had decided to throw on a hoodie this morning. The little park next to the hospital was almost deserted and the lack of busy noise around him didn’t help his warring thoughts.

Keisuke felt miserable. He rubbed his tired eyes and exhaled sharply in the futile hope that it would get rid of some of his pent-up emotions. His conversation with Takumi was still echoing through his memory.

_‘I don’t understand you.’_

What did Fujiwara not understand? That Keisuke was worried about him? That he told him he wasn’t to blame for what happened?

No matter what it was, the younger Takahashi had a feeling that he fucked up big time, even though he couldn’t pinpoint where exactly he went wrong. Maybe he should have listened to Ryosuke when he told him not to visit Fujiwara before noon, to give him some space. Still, his brother should understand best that he couldn’t sit around at home while being distracted and restless like this. Even Ryosuke was completely occupied with dealing with the Fujiwara issue after all. He had spent the night trying to get a lead on the assholes that attacked Fujiwara, probably trying to track the phone number that had sent the message and pulling all the strings he could. Not to mention that he was already preparing the guest room even before telling his downhill ace that he was meant to occupy it. Keisuke thought that was kind of a dick move, but then again: He knew his aniki and his tendency to prepare for events before they were decided, assuming that everything would go according to his will anyway. It could be really frustrating, especially because he was usually right about it.

Keisuke only wished he had known and been able to honestly convince Fujiwara instead of pressuring him by confronting him with accomplished facts. He wasn’t stupid; he could _see_ that the guy was totally overwhelmed by everything that was happening. And he could understand _that_ , at least. 

But was it so difficult to believe that he was worried? 

Thinking about it pained Keisuke, and he believed that the reason was not just not being understood (who besides his aniki could claim to do that, anyway?), but also who it was coming from. He felt some sort of connection with Fujiwara that compared to none of his other friendships. If his and Fujiwara’s relationship could even be called a friendship. 

Keisuke felt a lump build in his throat. 

Damn, he was really starting to act like a schoolgirl who just got rejected by her crush. He really needed to get rid of those sentiments so that he could be able to face Fujiwara again.

Still, he wished to be better at communicating with him. He wished he could call Fujiwara his friend in his thoughts without those ugly doubts at the back of his mind. He wished that the teen hadn’t been injured, that everything would be as before and that this situation wouldn’t get the chance to drive more of a wedge between them.

He wanted to be able to talk to Fujiwara without having to remember him laying on the dusty ground in dim light, covered in blood and bruises, dumped there like a now-useless pawn in their game. 

_It really is our fault, isn’t it?_

Keisuke rubbed his eyes again, trying to get rid of the pretty insistent moisture building at the corners. He stubbornly blamed it on his tiredness. But he couldn’t allow himself to break down right now; he needed to be there for Fujiwara and it didn’t matter if his help wasn’t as welcome as his brother’s.

So instead of wandering around aimlessly he decided to go get some lunch because he was starving. He had gone without breakfast and barely any sleep, and he was really starting to notice now.

Leaving the park and aiming for the busy shopping district nearby, Keisuke tried to ban the glum thoughts from his head with finality. He needed to get back on track as fast as possible and try mending things with Fujiwara, no matter how difficult it may be.

_____

The guest room looked still too empty to make anyone feel welcome. It was tastefully furnished and decorated, but rarely used and lacking any personality. Ryosuke sighed and eyed the bed and the shelves critically for any imperfections before closing the door behind him and traversing the hall on his way to the front door.

The FD was missing from its usual parking spot when he left the quiet house and Ryosuke merely sighed; he didn’t believe for one moment that Keisuke had just gone for a quick drive on Mt. Akagi. No, Ryosuke was as certain as he could be that his brother’s car was right now parked somewhere in the close vicinity of the hospital Fujiwara was currently involuntarily residing at. Had he even expected that Keisuke would listen to him when he told him to give Fujiwara some space? No, he hadn’t. He knew Keisuke, after all. 

With another sigh, Ryosuke got into the driver’s seat of his FC and didn’t waste any time starting the engine. While he pulled out of his parking spot his mind was not concentrating on driving at all, but he could do these motions in his sleep anyway. His thoughts were still with his brother and Fujiwara when he left the estate, the automatic gate closing behind him. He knew that Keisuke had good intentions, but his behaviour worried him nonetheless. He hadn’t seen his brother this restless in over three years and when Keisuke got restless, his pent-up energy needed to unload in some way. Ryosuke hoped intently that he wouldn’t unleash it upon Fujiwara. He’d never do it intentionally, of course. Few would suspect it upon meeting him, but Keisuke was one of the most kind-hearted people Ryosuke knew, and he seemed to have developed a soft spot for Fujiwara in particular. 

That had come as a surprise to the elder, but then again: He himself had developed a soft spot for the quiet teen as well. More than a simple ‘soft spot’ actually, but he did not enjoy dwelling on that particular problem. There were more pressing issues to resolve other than his selfish sentiments. 

Ryosuke maneuvered his car through the heavy traffic, only half concentrating on the world around him. A wry smile played around his lips as he realized how his thoughts drifted back to Fujiwara no matter how hard he tried to dissipate them. Making sure that his downhill ace recovered was most important right now, but Ryosuke had also managed to acquire a promising lead as to who the ones responsible for the teen’s injuries were. Once the most stressful phase was over, they would come to regret their decisions one way or another. 

He stopped in front of a traffic light and sighed, fingers drumming on the steering wheel impatiently. Part of him wondered if Keisuke had already let slip to Fujiwara that he was going to be their guest for a while, and what his downhill ace’s reaction had been. Keisuke could certainly be convincing, but he lacked the necessary sensitivity sometimes. Then again, Fujiwara wouldn’t refuse, would he? Ryosuke hoped he wouldn’t have to do any damage control. He had a plan and wanted to adhere to it. 

The light turned green and he resumed his way. There were so many things that he still needed to take care of until he could be sure that everything would go over smoothly. Hopefully the stress would help him forget about certain things, otherwise they would make this whole affair much more difficult for him.

_____

To say that Takumi was a bit surprised when Keisuke returned shortly after lunchtime would be an understatement. His teammate barged into the room as soon as he had been allowed to by the nurse and the look on his face confused Takumi; it seemed overly cheerful considering the way their prior conversation had gone.

Keisuke didn’t waste any time on greetings, “Here, I brought you something.” He grinned broadly, waving around a brown paper bag before cheerfully dropping it on Takumi’s chest. “I know that hospital food is terrible.”

Takumi grabbed the bag with some effort and peered inside. “Nikuman?”

Keisuke nodded, obviously satisfied with himself. “They should still be a bit warm.” 

“Thanks.” Takumi bit into one of the dumplings gratefully and enjoyed the savory taste of the pork filling. His teammate watched him dig in and grinned again. “You’re very welcome. Heh, you look like you’ve been starving for a week.”

“You’ve said it yourself: The food here is terrible.” 

Keisuke laughed, and Takumi peered at him from the corner of his eyes while chewing. His attitude had changed so drastically compared to this morning that it almost made Takumi feel uneasy. “What’s up with you all of a sudden?” Takumi grumbled under his breath, but Keisuke had heard him anyway. The amused smile left his face and he sighed. “Consider it an apology for earlier.”

Takumi let his hands sink down and directed his attention to his teammate. “What for?”

Keisuke looked hesitant, like it was difficult for him to enunciate, “For ambushing you like that, I guess. There were some things I could have said differently. I didn’t want to overwhelm you. So, sorry for that.” The strange apologetic look that looked so foreign on his face was back and Takumi was bewildered by him, once again. 

“You take back what you said?” Takumi asked hesitantly, a strange feeling of anxiousness in his stomach.

“No, don’t get me wrong. Everything I told you is true, and I stand by it,” Keisuke answered seriously. He leaned down and laid a reassuring hand on Takumi’s arm, “Don’t give yourself the fault for this. You are part of our team and,” he paused for the fraction of a second, “you are our friend and we want to help you, all right?”  
He looked so earnest that Takumi thought he could feel his heart stop, but maybe it was also because Keisuke was so close all of a sudden. It took all of Takumi’s restraint to not reach for where he touched him and grasp his hand to make it stay there. 

Keisuke smiled at him with a strange look in his eyes that Takumi hadn’t seen before. “It’s okay. You need to heal, and we’ll stay with you for as long as you need us to.” 

_‘Yes. Please stay,’_ Takumi thought, suddenly breathless and overcome with an onslaught of emotions. The moment dragged on and the two of them just stared each other awkwardly until the sound of the door opening startled them out of their reverie. 

Keisuke practically flinched back and pulled his hand away hastily, turning around to see who was entering the room. Takumi chased away his feelings of disappointment.

Takahashi Ryosuke closed the door and searched for something in their faces, slightly raising his eyebrows at them. Takumi realized they must probably look a bit like startled deer. The elder brother’s gaze fell on the paper bag with nikuman in Takumi’s hands. “You smuggled food in here?” he asked Keisuke. The addressed crossed his arms in front of him, “I didn’t _smuggle_ it, I just brought it in here in plain view and nobody stopped me. Is that forbidden?” Ryosuke shook his head with a sigh and glanced at Takumi, who was still fighting the feeling of loss that the absence of Keisuke’s touch had left. Ryosuke said something, but he didn’t catch it. “What?” he asked bluntly, and the elder chuckled.  
“I was asking if you're feeling better, Fujiwara.”

“Yeah,” Takumi replied truthfully, but flustered. He didn’t get as dizzy anymore every time he moved his head too quickly and he didn’t feel as fatigued as in the morning. Maybe it was the nikuman?

“That’s good to hear.” Ryosuke smiled at him and Keisuke turned back around to do the same, and Takumi felt his cheeks grow hot. The weird feeling in his stomach was back, and he wasn’t sure if it would leave so soon again.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This time with lots of fluff and no angst!  
> .  
> .  
> .  
> (Okay, I lied. There is a bit of angst.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the chapter I looked forward to writing the most (I think you'll know why), but I also struggled with it. I hope you like the result though! Comments are, as always, appreciated. ;)

After three days in the hospital, the doctors deemed it safe to discharge Takumi. His injured feet still made it very uncomfortable for him to walk, so he was carted to the parking lot in a wheelchair, much to his chagrin. 

The Takahashi brothers insisted on coming along, of course. It had been decided by Ryosuke that one of them would drive to Shibukawa and fetch some clothes and supplies for Takumi's stay from his home. 

Takumi was a bit reluctant about either of them visiting the tofu shop and talking to his father, but he was nonetheless amused when Keisuke reacted to the plan by perking up abruptly and trying to challenge his brother to a round of rock-paper-scissors. Ryosuke flat-out declined the challenge with a quiet laugh. "There's no need. I’ll go to Shibukawa, and you drive Fujiwara."

Keisuke grinned triumphantly and winked at Takumi. "Looks like you get to spend some quality time with me." 

He held open the FD's door for Takumi to get into the seat, a feat that the latter only accomplished with a lot of effort because moving too much still hurt. A lot.  
He was noticeably out of breath when he was finally sitting, which prompted concerned glances from both brothers. "You okay?" Keisuke asked, and Takumi nodded quickly, praying silently for him not to lean any closer than he already was. He could feel himself getting flustered again. 

Keisuke accepted the answer and closed the door. A few seconds passed while the other walked around the car, and Takumi stared at the dashboard in silence. It felt odd to sit in Keisuke's car and he was a bit apprehensive about it. He felt a bit like he was invading his teammate's privacy by being here, but the moment was broken when Keisuke opened the driver's side door and got in.  
"See you later, aniki!"  
Ryosuke nodded and got into the FC, and Keisuke closed the door. "Don't forget the seatbelt," he said with a glance at Takumi, who startled and quickly buckled up. Keisuke started the engine and they left the hospital's parking lot, Takumi hoping that he'd never have to return here.

They drove in silence for a while. Takumi felt both exhausted and nervous and tried to relax a bit, with limited success. Because that didn't work, he started to watch Keisuke as inconspicuously as possible. Takumi had never gotten the opportunity to see him drive up close, and even though they weren't on a mountain pass, he could still see clearly how skilled the other was. He didn't dare to actually ask him for it, but he hoped that maybe he'd get to watch him drive a race like this one day. Takahashi Keisuke was an amazing person and Takumi found that he enjoyed being around him, even though his presence made him nervous lately. That was the case with his brother, too. It was baffling to him how both of them seemed to care about him. He wasn't that special after all. 

Takumi noticed that they were now driving through a neighbourhood where all the houses looked really nice and had big gardens, and he needed a moment to process that this were probably where the brothers lived. He had somehow forgotten for a moment that they came from a wealthy family and most likely lived accordingly. 

_Damn._ He was so out of place here.

Keisuke eventually pulled into the driveway of a big western-style house. He must have noticed Takumi gawking, but that was hard to miss.  
"It's not that special," he said nonchalantly, probably aiming to reassure his teammate, but the offhand comment had a bit of the opposite effect. 

_'Well, it looks special to me,'_ Takumi thought, but didn't say out loud. 

Keisuke parked the car in a spot next to the entrance and smiled at Takumi, "Here we are." 

He left the car and Takumi did the same, or rather, attempted to. Before he had managed to maneuver his aching body out of the seat completely, Keisuke was by his side and didn't give him any kind of warning before he lifted him up with apparent ease, one arm under his shoulders and the other under his knees. Takumi's mind went blank for a second before it caught up with what was happening. He felt the heat rise to his face.

"Oi, stop that! I can walk on my own!" he spluttered and tried to twist out of Keisuke's grip, his face probably taking on the colour of an overripe tomato at this point. Keisuke had the gall to look completely unapologetic, "Of course you could. But you could also simply spare yourself the pain and let me do this."

Takumi glared at him, but there was not much of a threat behind it, because firstly (though Takumi hated to admit it) Keisuke had a point, and secondly arguing with him was incredibly difficult when he was so damn close to him that Takumi could probably listen to his heartbeat if he tried to. Every time the teen thought he was starting to understand his teammate and his actions, Keisuke did something that completely threw him out of the loop again.

"Calm down, no one's watching. And I definitely don't want you to walk the entire way while your feet are still healing," Keisuke reasoned.  
"Fine," grumbled Takumi and tried not to focus on how the blond held him close to his chest, and especially not on how secure he actually felt in the other's arms. 

There just _had_ to be some sort of conspiracy against him.

Unaware that Takumi was internally cursing the universe, Keisuke carried his teammate to the front door where he struggled with the keys for a while ("Shouldn't you just let me down so you have your hands free?" " _I got this,_ Fujiwara,") but was ultimately successful in opening the door for them. He stepped in and shoved the door close with his shoulder, the turn needed for this action almost resulting in Takumi bumping his head on the doorframe. "Shit. Sorry," the blond swore and shrugged his shoes off before carrying Takumi further into the house, which, to the latter's surprise, actually looked quite homely. In passing, Keisuke explained where the different doors led. "Bathroom. Door to the garage. Living room, as you can see. Our rooms are upstairs. Kitchen's down that hall. Parent's bedroom too, second door on the left. And here's the guest bedroom." He kicked open the door and crossed the room with Takumi still in his arms before laying him down on the bed. Takumi sighed in relief and hoped that he wouldn’t have to walk somewhere anytime soon. Being carried by Keisuke was very, very stressful for a variety of reasons. 

Now that the blond had his arms free again, he used them for a dramatic sweeping gesture and proclaimed, "Ta-dah! Welcome to your new residence for- actually, I don't know for how long." He looked around with a slight frown. "Man, we haven't had a guest here in ages. This room is so boring." 

Takumi shrugged; he had already concluded that he couldn't get bored as long as Keisuke was around. He was more likely to die of a heart attack because of the other.

"By the way: Care for anything to eat while we wait for aniki to get back here?"

That was a considerate offer, but Takumi suspected it would result in Keisuke carrying him to the dining table or something, so he hastily declined and instead asked the question that had come to his mind when they entered the house. "Won't your parents be bothered by me being here?"

Keisuke scoffed, "They likely won't even notice you're here unless one of them chooses exactly this weekend to drop by."

"They don't live here?"

"Nah. Our father usually stays at his apartment near the hospital so he's closer to his work, and mother has her own apartment, too. They come here occasionally to check if we haven't burned the house to the ground yet, but otherwise they leave us alone."

"Ah." Takumi was sure he noticed some bitterness in the other's voice and expression and decided not to ask any more questions about the topic. Still, he faintly wondered if it had always been like this: Two boys alone in a large, empty house. The thought wasn't very comfortable. 

Keisuke sat down on the foot end of the bed and regarded Takumi with a curious look. "You live with your parents, don’t you?"

"I live above the tofu shop with my father, yeah."

Keisuke paused and for a moment looked like he wanted to ask about Takumi’s mother, but he seemed to make the same decision as the latter and didn't try to dig deeper. "Doesn’t that occasionally get annoying?" he asked instead.

"Of course it does. My old man can be super obnoxious, especially when he wants me to help out in the shop," Takumi shrugged, "but, you know, it's nice to have someone to talk to when having your meals." He was silent for a second and reconsidered, "Well, we don't actually talk that much, but I still appreciate the company. Never let him hear that though."

Keisuke laughed, "I'll keep that in mind."

Takumi grinned back and thought about how nice it was to see Keisuke laugh honestly. He lamented that he didn't get to see this kind of laugh from the other more often. But for this small moment, his injuries and the reason he was here were forgotten. Suddenly, Takumi was filled with a strange sense of longing; for what exactly, he didn't know. It was the same feeling he had gotten back in the hospital. He wanted to understand Keisuke better and spend more time with him, and he hoped that the other might feel the same way. It definitely felt nice sitting here and talking to him, especially if he got to see him laugh like that. It also felt nice to have the other show interest in him that went beyond just his capabilities as a racer. 

Takumi hoped that Keisuke would never lose this interest.

He was getting comfortable with it and if it went away, it would inevitably be a deep fall for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There has been a lot of focus on Keisuke lately. I know I need to bring that Ryosuke content too. I just enjoy writing Keisuke's and Takumi's interactions so much that I can't help indulging a bit... :'D
> 
> And we also have a 'preview' of my interpretation of the Takahashi family. I've read quite a few fanfics now that included wildly different headcanons, especially of the brothers' father, whose interpretation ranges from 'cool dude' to 'absolute monster'. Mine is somewhere in between.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Takumi has a lot of insecurities and Ryosuke laments the fact that he always seems to end up in some sort of love triangle. Not necessarily in that order.
> 
> Featuring strange cooking analogies, some sentences that have no right to be that long, and excessive useage of the word 'quite'.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This turned out to be such a long chapter! Ryosuke fell a bit short in the last few chapters, so this one has a heavy focus on him! I hope you like it!
> 
> I have one request for you, too: If you can and have the time, could you tell me which chapter you liked the most until now and why you liked it? I'm sure that would help me to assess how to continue with this story (and there's a chance that I'll write more of what you like, so it's a win-win)!  
> I get the feeling that I'm about to hit a wall with a specific plot point of this story, and that's the 'how to deal with the assholes who attacked Takumi' plot point. I have only a very vague and non-satisfying resolution for it and the closer I get to having to write it, the more anxious I get about it...

The day had already moved well into the afternoon when Ryosuke pulled into the driveway and parked his car next to the FD. He had spent more time than planned in Shibukawa, but he wasn’t angry about it. By visiting the Fujiwara Tofu Shop and getting to have a second conversation with Fujiwara Bunta he felt like he had gained some more insight into the life of his quiet downhill ace. He was definitely playing with fire here, but he had pushed away his bad premonitions about getting himself caught even deeper in that self-made 'problem' he had and his need to sate his curiosity had won as it so often did. 

He grabbed the bag that held some clothes and a few other supplies for Fujiwara and left the car, walking over to the front door and turning around the key in the lock with a sigh. He opened the door to find the house quiet as he had left it, but the light in the hall burned and he spotted Keisuke's shoes thrown lazily into a corner, which reassured him that there was someone at home after all. Of course there was, Ryosuke thought with a shake of his head. He took off his coat and changed into his house slippers before walking towards the guest room that he could now hear his brother's voice from.

He knocked lightly on the door before entering, causing Keisuke to pause in whatever he had been telling Fujiwara about. The latter was laying comfortably in the bed that had been prepared for him while Keisuke sat at the foot end, and Ryosuke smiled at them in greeting.

"There you are! What took you so long?" Keisuke greeted him, his easy grin telling of his good mood. 

Ryosuke ignored the question and handed the small bag of clothes supplies to Fujiwara, who took it while mumbling his thanks. The older one hoped that everything important was in there and he hadn’t forgotten anything. Should he have packed some more of the other's shirts?

But Fujiwara glanced inside the bag and said nothing, so either everything was there, or he was too polite to ask about it. He was such a quiet person and sometimes Ryosuke didn’t know what to make of it, but on the other hand it was part of Takumi's appeal…

_Fujiwara. Not Takumi. Don't even start with that._

Even just thinking of the other by his first name only led to more dangerous thoughts, like a fantasy of him cuddling up against him or kissing him...

No. He was supposed to have more self-restraint than that, for heaven's sake. Thoughts like these were incredibly selfish of him, especially now that Takumi- no, _Fujiwara_ \- was injured and he had already persuaded him to stay with him (them) for a while.

Maybe it was already too late though. 

Ryosuke's thoughts were interrupted by Keisuke standing up from where he was sitting on the bed and cracking his neck before announcing, "Well, now that you’re here, I’m going to make something to eat. I don’t know about you two, but I’m starving. It’s almost evening now, anyway." 

"That sounds very promising," Ryosuke answered with a faint smile. Takumi, however, seemed to be a bit more hesitant for some reason. While the older brother couldn't quite figure out why, Keisuke seemed to have a pretty good idea. "Don’t worry. You can just stay here and not move."

Takumi seemed relieved, but Keisuke was not done. As if to accentuate his words, he leaned down and the small movement he made next looked like he was smoothing down the other's blanket. He caught himself and straightened up again, but Ryosuke had seen the look on his face.

He was, to put it plainly, quite flabbergasted to witness such a tender gesture by Keisuke towards someone else. Something about the look on his brother's face when he looked at Takumi seemed startlingly familiar, and Ryosuke cursed himself for not recognising it any sooner.

During these last few days he had seen all the hints and signs, but maybe he had simply refused to acknowledge them until now.

He had never given the possibility any consideration, but now that he had seen it, it was blatantly obvious: Keisuke was in love with Fujiwara. 

In love with Takumi.

He almost laughed at the realisation. He thought it was genuinely funny how situations like this one showed just how similar he and Keisuke were in certain aspects. Who would have thought that they would both end up falling for the same person? Ryosuke hadn't even expected that his brother also found himself attracted to men, but that wasn't something he would have declared impossible either. The longer Ryosuke thought about it, the less surprising his discovery seemed. It was clear to everyone that both of them had a sort of fascination with Takumi, the only person to beat both of them soundly in a race on his first try and practically coming out of nowhere when they had least expected any serious competition to appear. Seeing how alike the two of them were sometimes, it was no wonder that this fascination developed into something more for Keisuke, just like it had happened with him. 

He had become aware of his feelings for Fujiwara right after their first race, but he suspected that they might have been kindled even earlier than that. Maybe when he saw him race up close for the first time and found himself fascinated by the way he turned drifting into a true form of art.

Ryosuke didn't fall in love often. In fact, there had only been two times in his life where he really felt anything beyond simple aesthetic attraction and developed romantic feelings for someone. And the first time that happened had ended so catastrophically that he had refused to acknowledge it for over a year until it came back to haunt him. 

He couldn't allow this to happen again the second time. 

He knew that he would yield to his brother and give up on it if he had to. Anything to avoid putting Takumi through a situation similar to Kaori's, a situation where both sides pressured for an incredibly painful decision until the third crumbled under the expectations and saw only one way out.

It was partly his fault that this had happened, and his mistakes had led to a horrible end.

 _Never again._

He'd let Takumi choose his own happiness, and even if he'd decide for Keisuke or, more likely, someone else entirely, he would step back and let him go. Anything to spare him of the pain that Kaori went through because of his foolish inability to understand her situation.

It was only fortunate that Ryosuke didn't believe in fate. If he did, he might have wondered if everyone he cared about was destined to suffer for it.

_____

Takumi's eyes followed Keisuke as the other left the room. He hadn't missed his little gesture and it made about as much sense to him as the warmth spreading through his chest, which was, unfortunately, not much. He hoped intently that he wasn't blushing again, because Ryosuke remained in the room and he really didn’t want the other to see it.

Something about Ryosuke's expression had changed now that Takumi looked at him. Were it any other person, Takumi would probably describe it as wistful. But with Ryosuke, he was not certain at all about how to interpret it, so he was simply left to wonder. Wondering was something he did a lot lately. He thought about how eager the two brothers seemed to be about having him here, and then about Keisuke's explanation that they were alone here most of the time, and he couldn't help but wonder whether one of those things was related to the other.

"Does Keisuke know how to cook?" he asked, because Ryosuke had sat down on the chair in front of the little desk and the silence was getting awkward.

"Yes. Does that surprise you?"

"A little bit, yeah."

Ryosuke chuckled at Takumi's answer, but before the latter could feel stupid because of it, his mentor added, "Well, I don’t blame you. He doesn't seem like it, does he? Then again, I certainly will be the last person to complain." There was an amused glint in the other's eyes and Takumi couldn't help but laugh a little, too. 

Both of them fell silent again and Takumi could only hear the faint clatter of dishes from the kitchen. It was a strange moment that logically shouldn't even have been allowed to happen, but here he was. It was concerning how fast he felt himself getting used to being here and talk to his two teammates about things that weren't racing or related to racing, even though he had thought that this was the only thing that could ever be enough to connect him to these amazing people that were still so far above his level. He tried hard to be a worthy addition to the team, but sometimes he thought that he had taken Ryosuke's rightful place as a racer because he was certain that his skills barely compared to that of the famed White Comet.

Maybe he should stop thinking so much.

_Too late._

"Ryosuke-san?"

"Yes?"

There were many questions Takumi wanted to ask, but his mind went to the easiest. "When do you think will I be able to drive again?"

Ryosuke tilted his head the slightest bit as he seemed to consider the question for a moment before answering, "I'd say you should wait about three weeks and take it easy after that, just to be safe. We don't want that cracked rib to turn into a broken one, do we?" A corner of his mouth was quirked up in a small, forced-looking half-smile. 

Takumi didn't feel like smiling either. Three weeks of not training and not being on the road; that was more than any interruption he had ever since he was thirteen. 

Ryosuke, of course, seemed to know what he was thinking about. "It's a delay, yes, but we can afford to wait that long. Without you it would be futile to continue any expeditions we have planned. Don't worry about it too much. You'll be fine if you just give yourself this time to heal and rest a bit. I know you will."

The expression on his mentor's face was a mystery to Takumi yet again, and the older man's words left behind a strange feeling of trepidation that the younger could only explain as his reaction to yet another implication how vital he was to the team, a fact that he had been mulling over just before. 

"I don’t know if you think this is a stupid question, but…" Takumi paused and looked down at his blanket, unsure whether he should or even wanted to continue. Ryosuke was already listening, though. "I’m sure that the question isn't stupid. I promise you that I will answer it as well as I can. Just ask away, Fujiwara." 

Takumi still wasn't convinced, but it was a question he yearned to have an answer for and he suspected that if he didn't ask it now, he would never go through with it. He took a little breath to steel himself. "I know that you put a lot of effort into training me. A lot of effort and time and resources, and sometimes I wonder if I'm really worth all of that, you know? Even now that I delay the whole Project because I got myself injured-"

Ryosuke's face had gotten steadily darker while Takumi talked, and now he opened his mouth to intercept the tirade, but Takumi raised one hand to stop him before he could. 

"Please, let me finish first."

With a stiff nod, Ryosuke leaned back in the chair and Takumi took it as a sign to continue. 

"Even now that there's this delay, you insist on waiting for me even though I'm sure it could be done without me. Don't get me wrong, I _want_ to race those other teams. I really do. I just want to know why you think I'm so important to your team. I don't see why it would be necessary to postpone everything when you have everything you need to win these races yourself." 

Takumi took a glance at Ryosuke after finishing and noticed the deep frown on the other's face. Hastily, he added, "I know I'm not good at expressing things like that, I'm sorry if it's difficult to understand-"

His mentor interrupted his rambling, face now taking on a somewhat neutral expression again.

"It is difficult to understand, but not in the way you think it is. You made quite clear to me what you want to know. You're asking me why I'm insisting on you as a driver for Project D when I could drive those races as well, correct?"

"Yes." Takumi was still surprised at how steady he managed to sound when something had just made him confess his biggest insecurities to the one they concerned.

"Let me try to explain then, why both you and Keisuke are so important to my little project." Ryosuke let out a small sigh and folded his hands in his lap, slightly frowning in consideration. 

"We briefly talked about the topic of cooking earlier, right? I think that serves as a good analogy. Can you cook, Fujiwara?"

Takumi nodded, "Me and my father usually take turns making dinner."

"I see. That works very well with my analogy. Earlier, I told you that Keisuke is the one of us two who usually does the cooking. The reason for that is quite a simple one. See, I've tried cooking by the book a few times and while the results were edible, somehow they never turned out quite as good as what Keisuke produces when he just throws leftovers and a few other ingredients into a pan without thinking too much about it. He clearly has something I don't, a certain feel for things like that. An instinct, if you will. Do you see what I am getting at?"

"I’m not sure…"

"I'll try to elaborate further, then. I'm the kind of person that tries to understand the rules behind the things I do and then adheres to those 'recipes'. I work best with theories and logic, things that are unchangeable and that apply universally."

Ryosuke closed his eyes briefly and chuckled once before continuing, "Only that for some things, these theories don't always have to apply. Both cooking and racing are examples for that. Theories and logic work well within science. Science is absolutely a part of those activities, but they are more forms of art than science. And as much as it hurts me to admit it, my approach has its limits when it comes to that. There will always be things that I couldn't do, but you and Keisuke can. That's because both of you own something very important that I don't have: Instinct."

Takumi was listening to the other's explanations fascinatedly. He thought that he started to understand the point that his mentor wanted to make, and it baffled him that the other thought that he had this kind of advantage over him.

A small smile spread on Ryosuke's face. "Instinct is a very valuable gift to own, but one has to be able to make use of it, too. I have never met anyone who utilized it to the point of performing the kind of little miracles that you do. Give yourself some credit for it."

Maybe he was waiting fore some kind of response, but Takumi could only stare at him. The words hit him hard, but harder than that hit a disconcerting, dangerous, and cruelly exhilarating realisation.

Ryosuke looked at him with a gentle smile on his face that reached his eyes this time, and Takumi just couldn't tear his eyes away from him. Even if he did, he doubted that breaking eye contact would stop the warm feeling that was spreading through his body, comfortable and choking at the same time. Ryosuke was so brilliant, so unnervingly attractive, and so unduly invested in him. He was just Takumi, _just Takumi_ , and now he was sitting here in the other's home and realising that he was so painfully and dangerously in love with this man who was generally so much above his level that it wasn't even funny.

He was so, so screwed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have some bad news for you, Takumi: This isn't even as bad as it gets ;)


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keisuke makes use of his Annoying Little Brother superpowers!
> 
> And Ryosuke? Ryosuke is, like, _seriously_ pining.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not dead!!! Sorry for the long wait, but first I got a case of the flu, then I got a case of the Writer's Block, and then I got a nice little taste of Upcoming Holiday Stress. All of those meant that I only wrote a few snippets at a time and didn't really get anything together.
> 
> But here it is! A new chapter that I hope you'll like! See it as a Christmas present, if you will. ;)

When Keisuke returned to the other two, happy with the results of his efforts in the kitchen, he stepped into the guest room and did a mental double take. A weird mood hung in the air that definitely had not been there before he left. Ryosuke looked like he was brooding, and there was a sense of restlessness and anxiety looming over Fujiwara that Keisuke did not like one bit. At least he thought it was some kind of anxiety. He was pretty sure that he was getting better at picking up the little signs that his quiet teammate showed of his emotions. 

Well, the mood in this room had been much better before he left it. Ryosuke might accuse him of behaving like a bull in a china shop sometimes, but he was certain that it wasn't him who fucked up this time. Just what had these two been talking about?  
Damn, he really hated this. Another few seconds passed without either of them acknowledging his presence, and he was getting impatient.

"Do you want any food now, or what?" 

His slightly irritated question seemed to startle both of them out of their thoughts as they finally directed their attention to him and the two bowls in his hands. Oh, hell. If they were spacing out like that, Keisuke wouldn’t get any decent conversation out of either of them today. He should probably think of a way to lighten up this heavy mood. Great. Just what he had signed up for. 

He wordlessly shoved one bowl into his brother's hands, who didn't even spare the contents a look and instead opted to continue concentratedly staring into nothingness. At least he thanked him for the food, despite not seeming very interested in it at the moment. 

Fujiwara was, surprisingly, much more attentive than Ryosuke now that his attention was on the bowl's contents. He eyed them a bit sceptically, which made Keisuke feel a bit insulted. "It's not going to bite you or anything," he grumbled and squinted at the other when he tore his eyes away from the rice dish and looked at him instead. "That wasn’t what I–" Fujiwara trailed off and shook his head once, "Oh, nevermind." 

"If you say so," Keisuke retorted dryly, and Fujiwara wisely avoided looking sceptical anymore. Damn. Seriously, what was going on with those two?

He frowned at both of them again, neither seeming to notice. With a little frustrated huff Keisuke turned around to fetch a third bowl for himself. He needed to get both of them back on track somehow, especially because he wanted to talk to Ryosuke later and he could forget about that when his brother was like this.

Fortunately, Keisuke had just the idea what to do. It looked like it was time to make use of that certain skill that all younger siblings on this planet shared. 

With his mood slightly improved and a steaming bowl and the accompanying chopsticks in his hands, Keisuke returned to the guest room, where Ryosuke and Fujiwara waited for him to return. He sat down on the foot end of the bed again and threw a pair of chopsticks in Fujiwara's direction, but the younger man didn't pay attention and watched with a slightly confused expression as they hit his chest and dropped into his lap. Keisuke chortled and threw the second pair at Ryosuke, who caught them effortlessly despite looking like he was all the way in Narnia with his thoughts. Prick. 

"Enjoy your meal," Keisuke grumbled and didn't wait for either of them before starting to dig in. Just like he had said before, he was starving. Out of the corner of his eye he watched Fujiwara hesitantly starting to eat as well. With no small amount of satisfaction, he registered the slight surprise on the younger driver's face. 

This was what victory felt like! 

"It’s… good," Fujiwara mumbled upon noticing his teammate's not-so-subtle stare.

Keisuke clutched his chest in mock offense.

"That’s all I get?" he gasped dramatically. "Hey, at the very least it’s edible! Unlike that one time aniki here tried to make takoyaki–"

His brother suddenly came to life again upon hearing that and stopped him before he could go into detail about this embarrassing incident from their childhood. "I was _twelve_ when that happened." 

Ryosuke was frowning and looked slightly flustered as he, without a doubt, was tormented by memories of a very unappetizing attempt at making dinner. For Keisuke, it marked a small moment of triumph that he simply couldn't resist basking in from time to time, especially because it was one of the very few things that his aniki would actually get embarrassed about. As the younger sibling, it was basically Keisuke's _duty_ to occasionally bring up embarrassing memories like these.

And aside from the satisfaction of reminding his oh-so-perfect brother that there were some things he was simply bad at, well…

The blond glanced at Fujiwara, who was unsuccessfully trying to hide a small, amused smile at their banter.

Keisuke grinned inwardly.

_Gotcha._

Ryosuke was glaring at him, but at least he was also paying attention now. 

_Careful. I have more stories I could tell Fujiwara and you know it._

His brother did indeed know that, so instead of admonishing him further, he raised his chopsticks. "If we don’t start eating now, the food will get cold."

_Sure, aniki. Now you're suddenly interested in the food. Way to divert the attention._

Keisuke resumed eating his dinner, but he was smiling down at his bowl. The atmosphere in the room had almost returned back to the way it had been before he left it. 

Almost, because some of the strange emotional heaviness still hung in the air between them and Keisuke wondered whether he was the only one to notice.

He gave Fujiwara another side-glance, tracing the other's slow movements with his eyes. The younger seemed to eat hesitantly, and for a moment Keisuke asked himself if his dish was that bad. Taking another bite, he assured himself that this definitely wasn't the case. He wasn't one for false humility, after all. 

His eyes wandered back over to his brother, who ate silently as well and still looked a little bit flustered, but not so much that anyone other than Keisuke would have been able to notice. He was the first one to finish eating, always having been a very fast eater. He didn't waste time on _anything_ , not even food. It really spoke for itself that he always made time for having dinner with him when he most definitely had some very important other things to do. He always seemed to have. 

Keisuke watched on as his brother set down the empty bowl on the little table and placed the chopsticks neatly beside it before leaning back in his chair and thoughtfully looking at Fujiwara. Of course, _Fujiwara_ was the reason why he was still sitting here and not already excusing himself to be back at his desk to study or run simulations or whatever he did while other people went to sleep. It was understandable, really; Keisuke was like that as well. He'd usually be on Akagi right now, training relentlessly so he could one day be good enough to kick aniki's ass in a race. Fujiwara's, too; though that was out of question at the moment anyway. 

Still, something about the look in Ryosuke's eyes bothered him and he couldn't figure out what it was. He finished his meal as well and flicked a stray grain of rice that stuck to the rim back into the bowl. This was so weird, all of it. The three of them sitting in this room and having dinner together was just so… surreal. Fujiwara was still eating at a painfully slow pace and Ryosuke was staring with this foreign look on his face that Keisuke couldn't even read properly. He drummed his fingers on the bedframe quietly, wanting to finally talk to his brother about what the fuck he knew. Damn, his patience was wearing thin. 

_This sucks._

_____

  


Ryosuke could sense his brother's agitation and knew that a confrontation was waiting for him. He didn't want to have one, not now that his thoughts were in turmoil and a headache was building behind his temples. Time for an aspirin before talking to Keisuke, he guessed.

His brother was putting away the dishes, cursing quietly as a chopstick fell out of one of the bowls and landed on the ground with a clatter. While he bent down to retrieve it, Ryosuke opened the cupboard and, after considering for a moment, took out three glasses. He filled each of them with water and swallowed the painkillers before picking up one of the other two glasses and a new, full bottle of water.

"I'll bring these to Fujiwara," he announced, watching Keisuke trying to balance the bowls in his hands while at the same time trying to open the door of the dishwasher. "Do you need help?"

Keisuke just grumbled something unintelligible, which Ryosuke interpreted as a no. If his brother dropped the bowls, he could clean it up himself then. Ryosuke left the kitchen and walked back to the guest room with glass and bottle in his hands, musing over the fact that said room was practically in the last corner of the house, as far away from his bedroom as possible. He didn't like that circumstance. What if there was some kind of emergency in the middle of the night and he didn't hear it?

_There won't. Takumi can take care of himself._

It was reassuring that a rational part of his brain still seemed to work even when Fujiwara was concerned. He shook his head at himself. This absolutely needed to stop. With the arrival of love, his ability to make sensible decisions quickly dwindled. He hated to admit it to himself, but that was just what was happening. Especially now that Keisuke was thrown into the equation, he found his resolve to stay away crumbling faster than what he deemed comfortable. After all the months of telling himself not to pursue, he was now questioning if he should just throw his cautions into the wind. And that was all happening in the course of just one evening! The situation was quickly getting out of his control.

He sighed. "Fujiwara, I'm bringing you some water," he announced before entering Takumi's room because he didn't have a hand free to knock on the door.

Takumi hadn't moved much since his company had left. "Oh. Thanks," he said when Ryosuke set down the bottle and the glass on the bedside table.

Ryosuke smiled at him and noticed himself that his eyes remained on the other's face for a tad too long. Takumi was nice to look at, that much was true. At the moment though, the dark bruise on his cheek reminded Ryosuke that the teen was not here out of enjoyment and that he had to get himself together before he did something impulsive and stupid.

_You don’t do things that are impulsive and stupid. Seriously, get yourself together, Takahashi Ryosuke._

Thinking that, he moved back from his position too-close-to-Takumi's-face and tried to ignore the faint feeling of guilt that rose inside him. He should have been able to prevent all of this from happening. He was supposed to fulfil his duties as a mentor instead of pining after his young downhill ace. He was supposed to be satisfied that Takumi even agreed to be a part of his dream in the first place.

And yet, he selfishly still wanted more.

He was so very selfish.

For a moment, Takumi looked like he wanted to ask something, but he didn't. Ryosuke tilted his head and smiled faintly again. The younger sometimes seemed to think that what he wanted to say wasn’t worth listening to, but Ryosuke was always willing to listen to him. But he wouldn't urge him to speak this time. Their earlier conversation had been emotionally draining for both of them by the looks of it. Ryosuke knew that he wouldn't get a break today before he talked to his brother, but Takumi didn't have to exert himself for another conversation.

"Rest, Fujiwara. Believe me; you deserve it."

Takumi looked at him, a little bit surprised at the sudden words. He nodded, though. "I will try."

It was as good an answer as Ryosuke would get today, so he nodded back, satisfied, and left the room. He closed the door behind himself and took a deep breath at the memory of how close he had been to leaning down and… _kissing_ Takumi.

Just the mental image of how horrified the other would have been helped to quell the nagging question of _'What if I did and it was okay?'_ that crept around in his mind.

 _Get. Yourself. Together._

Another deep breath, then he steeled himself and walked back towards the kitchen. Something had been on Keisuke's mind and they needed to talk about that as well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I planned to put the brother's conversation into this chapter as well at first, but I figured it was already wrong enough and I wanted to put some content out as soon as possible! And so it will have to wait until next time. Just what will those two talk about, I wonder...?
> 
>  
> 
> On a side note: Readers who kept a watch on my ever-changing tags will have noticed that I dropped Asexual Takahashi Ryosuke on you. I just jammed into the tags because I'm not planning for it to be a big plot point or something. There have been implications already and he just is in this story. And I tagged it because it should totally be a thing imo. Side note over! ;)


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The conversation that should have been in the last chapter already happens.  
> It turns out that Keisuke is still very angry and that Ryosuke is definitely a tiny bit jealous, which are not the best grounds for a peaceful discussion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't manage to finish this chapter in 2018, so let's start 2019 with a new chapter instead. I hope you'll enjoy, even if this is mainly leftovers from last time. The next chapter will likely have some fluff again. I might need a bit longer to finish it though because I'll be going on a short vacation tomorrow! ^^

Keisuke was sitting at the kitchen table and staring at his glass of water with a deep crease on his forehead. He looked up when he heard his brother enter the room and his expression relaxed somewhat before he went back to staring at the glass.

The following silence dragged on for longer than was normal for an agitated Keisuke. Ryosuke leaned against the kitchen counter and looked at his brother in turn before deciding to speak up, “There’s something on your mind.” It wasn’t a question because it didn’t need to be. 

Keisuke didn’t acknowledge the non-question, just as expected. “About that thing with Fujiwara and the guys who beat him up-“, his fingers tightened around the water glass, “–you know something about them, don’t you?”

_'Ah. So that’s what this is about.'_

Ryosuke shook his head slightly, noting the tenseness in his brother’s posture. It wasn’t surprising that he was inquiring about it as he could be quite perceptive at times, especially when Ryosuke tried to hide something from him. 

He chose his next words carefully. “It surprises me that you’re asking about this now.”

Keisuke scoffed at him. “I didn’t just forget what those assholes did, and neither did you.”

“And what makes you think I have any information?” 

“I don’t just think that, I _know_ that. You don’t need to pretend that you didn’t spend every free minute trying to get a lead on them and the fact that you stopped means that there is something,” was the answer he got. The reasoning wasn’t bad at all, but Ryosuke knew how a Keisuke moments away from exploding looked like and he needed to stop this situation from escalating and messing with his own plans.

“Even if there were, I don’t see why I need to tell you.”

Of course, that sentence caused the situation to escalate in an entirely different manner.

“Are you kidding me?!” Keisuke was fuming now. “Do you think I can just ignore what happened to Fujiwara? Do you think I enjoy seeing him like that?! After everything that went on, we _owe_ it to him to get even with those bastards, whoever they are! Hell, he can’t even walk properly! I had to carry him all the way from the car this afternoon! I can’t fucking deal with this, aniki! They have to pay for what they did!”

“Stop being so loud, Keisuke. Fujiwara will hear.”

Keisuke faltered a little and glanced in the direction of the doorway before continuing with his tirade, a little bit quieter this time.

“Just think about it again. That they beat him up is bad enough already, but they fucking slashed up his feet! What kind of sicko does that?! How fucked up are their brains to even get that _idea?!_ ” 

Ryosuke watched with growing unrest as Keisuke raised his voice again, trembling with rage and looking like he was about to storm out of the room, out of the house and into some corner of the city to unleash his anger upon the first unlucky bastard who looked at him the wrong way. Before Ryosuke could follow his impulse to rush over to his brother and stop him from doing just that by force if necessary, Keisuke’s rigid stance relaxed somewhat and all he did was to glare at his older brother before continuing to speak.

“You know who they are. Don’t try to deny it, I know you and I know that there’s something you’re not telling me. Tell me who they are, aniki. Tell me.”

Ryosuke stared back at his brother and shook his head after just the smallest moment of consideration. “Keisuke, you can ask me that five more times and I’m still not going to tell you. At least definitely not before I’m sure that you’re not going to do something rash and stupid with that information. And looking at you now, I’m not certain if you’ll ever reach that point.” 

In a sudden burst of rage, Keisuke stood up so suddenly that Ryosuke thought the chair might fall over and prepared himself for the sudden sound. His brother didn’t take his words very well by the looks of it, but that had been almost expected. Keisuke’s anger was righteous – or at the very least understandable – but the extent was surprising nonetheless. 

Keisuke did not lunge at him in his rage, though Ryosuke would have been prepared for that. But he didn’t sit back down, either. 

Maybe he was losing his calm because he hadn’t been able to concentrate on racing lately. Maybe he was thrown out of balance now that his rival was injured and unable to even him out.

No, something about that didn’t sound right and Ryosuke knew it, though it was still difficult for him to acknowledge the fact that his little brother felt affection for Takumi as well.

This thought directly led him back to the situation at hand: Keisuke confronting him full of righteous anger on Takumi’s behalf.

“Don’t pretend that you don’t want to do the same thing, aniki. You’re not fooling me and I hope you don’t actually believe you are. Stop acting so high and mighty when you’re thinking exactly the same thing as I do! Stop trying to keep me out of this! This is my business just as much as it is yours!”

There it was. Of course, Keisuke was right about this; yes, Ryosuke was just as angry as him and for the exact same reasons as him, and being reminded of that didn’t help him heed his own advice of not doing something rash and stupid.

“I think that this is Fujiwara’s business first and foremost,” he said calmly despite the thoughts that told him otherwise.

Keisuke naturally picked up on it. “Stop bullshitting me. It’s not like you to be this considerate. When do you ever stay out of other people’s business when it has _anything_ to do with you?!”, he spat.

That stung a bit, and Ryosuke hoped that his slight feeling of hurt at his brother’s words didn’t show on his face.

“I’ve been told that it sometimes proves quite important when I _intrude in other people’s business,_ ” he retorted quietly and fixed his brother with a pointed stare. Keisuke pursed his lips and averted his gaze, knowing what Ryosuke was alluding to. The latter knew that what he said had been harsh and realized that maybe these words shouldn’t have left his mouth in the first place, because his brother wasn’t as good at keeping the hurt from showing on his face. 

It was unfair of him to confront Keisuke with his past mistakes again in this way. The fact that this was a conversation about Takumi’s wellbeing didn’t give him the right to do so either.

“You’re right, you know. I do feel the same way about this as you do,” he said, and Keisuke looked at him again, his tense expression not having changed in the slightest. 

“However, I think you also know that if we want retribution for what they have done, we have to choose a different approach. Simply confronting them with the same violence will not change anything in the long run.”

“It will, if I make sure to break every single bone in their bodies multiple times,” Keisuke muttered darkly.

Ryosuke felt the corner of his mouth lift a little. His brother had understood, even if he didn’t want to admit it. If Ryosuke had to be honest with himself, he had to admit that he actually somewhat liked and appreciated that Keisuke showed his concern, even though the ways he did might be problematic. It was another good reason to proceed with his plans as fast as possible so Keisuke could let go of his unrest and anger for his own sake as well.

“I’m asking you to trust me now, Keisuke. I can promise you that they _will_ pay for what they have done, in due time.” 

Keisuke looked down and sighed. “You know it’s not that easy for me.”

Ryosuke nodded slowly. Yes, he knew that. He even was aware of that one additional reason that made it so difficult for his brother to sit around and feel like he was doing nothing.

He would have liked to talk about said reason and feel around for Keisuke’s intentions or if he was really as unaware as it seemed, but a suspicious sound from outside the door distracted him. Keisuke didn’t seem to have heard anything, but he connected the dots when he saw his brother walk over to the door quietly and followed in his track to glance over his shoulder when he checked the hallway.

_‘Just like I thought.’_

Takumi was staring back at him, his expression a bit like that of a child who had been caught stealing from a jar of candy. He held onto the doorframe of the living room with one hand and was standing on his toetips, feet almost unnoticeably starting to tremble the longer he just remained there.

Before Ryosuke could say anything, his brother pushed past him and fixed Takumi with a slight glare. “Oi, you’re not supposed to walk around!”  
Takumi looked slightly annoyed and frowned back at Keisuke. “I was going to brush my teeth,” he explained himself and held up the toothbrush that had been in the bag Ryosuke brought him.

“You could have just said anything. I could have–“

To Ryosuke’s amusement, the brown-haired teen rapidly blushed a furious shade of red and quickly said, “No! I can walk just fine if I do it like this.” As if to prove his point, he made a few careful steps forward, steadying himself with one hand on the wall. 

“Do you know where the bathroom is?”, asked Ryosuke and Takumi stopped walking again, shooting a glance at Keisuke. “No, I don’t remember. That’s what I wanted to ask.”

Keisuke still looked a bit miffed but was the fastest to answer anyway. “That door over there on the left.” He paused for a moment and they both watched as Takumi made a few more slightly wobbly steps towards his destination. “You sure you don’t want me to–“

Another glare was sent in Keisuke’s direction, and he lifted his hands in defeat. “Fine then, I guess,” he grumbled as no objection from Ryosuke followed. They both retreated into the kitchen a bit, but still kept their eyes on their teammate until he had reached the door to the bathroom.

“Damn,” Keisuke cursed quietly, “you better do something about this fast or I can’t guarantee for anything.”

Ryosuke couldn’t help but agree with him, though he doubted that Keisuke would be able to obtain the necessary information without his help and didn’t worry much about his brother’s statement. Still, he had to agree with the sentiment. Something had to be done in retribution, and he was sure that Takumi would agree if he told him. Would he burden him with the knowledge though? Maybe it would be best to keep him out of the further proceedings as much as he could.

He wondered how much the other might have heard of their conversation.

Well, that probably was a question for another day...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ryosuke is about to ruin some lives, I think.
> 
>  
> 
> ~~I think, because I'm still not _entirely_ sure how to proceed with that plot point; why did I do this to myself~~


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Takumi has a really, really hard time coming to terms with his feelings, the situation, and basically just everything in general. Ryosuke doesn't help, even though he tries. (He might be overdoing it a little, actually.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry... Every time I say the next chapter will be fluff, I end up writing more angst... I'd say that the next chapter will definitely be fluff, but I'm probably going to jinx myself with that. 
> 
> Good news: This chapter is longer than usual! And I'm tired. Why does my motivation always come late in the evening when I have work the next day...? It's a mystery.

When Takumi woke up on the morning of his second day at the Takahashi residence, it seemed to be still dusk outside. He blinked away the last remnants of sleep and chased away the strange feeling that always came with awaking in a bedroom that was not his own. There was no alarm clock on his bedside table for him to check the time, which left him with no idea whether everyone else in the house might still be sleeping or not. 

He wondered if he had woken up because it would have been time for the tofu delivery by now, or if his inner clock had relented and let him sleep for a few more hours. For a little moment the thought that it was probably time to leave for work crossed his mind before he remembered that today was not going to be a regular work day. Work was cancelled for him as well as driving until he got better and maybe even a little longer than that because carrying heavy furniture around with a recently cracked rib was a definite no-go, he had been informed. It made sense, really, but he wondered what to do with all of this free time now. His boss had been informed about his injury already, and Takumi hoped that he would not be too pissed off about him missing so many days of work. It was nice to get to sleep in for once, though.

Takumi sat up in his bed slowly and yawned. The scent of freshly brewed coffee registered in his mind and he concluded that he wasn’t the first to wake up after all. He pondered staying in bed for a bit longer, but he doubted that he could fall asleep again anyway and carefully got up instead, choosing to follow the coffee scent that led him to the kitchen. It was still uncomfortable for him to walk and he was slightly exhausted from the unusual exertion of walking on his tiptoes upon reaching the kitchen door. 

When he peered inside the room, he saw that it had been Ryosuke preparing the coffee he smelled, and he was right now rummaging in the cupboards for a cup while Takumi stood in the doorway honestly considering if he should sneak off back to bed as long as he still could. As long as he hadn’t sorted out this issue with himself, he didn’t feel very comfortable in Ryosuke’s presence when Keisuke was not around to take some attention off him. Takumi was a bit scared that now that he had found out why he was getting so nervous and flustered in his mentor’s presence all the time, he was being too obvious and would be seen right through. It had been difficult to talk to Ryosuke before his discovery, but now it had become almost impossible and Takumi was certain that he would just end up saying something stupid and embarrassing. He wished he could just ignore the feelings he had discovered, and maybe he could have been successful if the circumstances were a bit different.

The problem was that Takahashi Ryosuke was already not easy to ignore. Practically living in the same house with him made it even more impossible. 

_‘I’m only making a fool out of myself lately…’_

Takumi was still considering leaving as quietly as he could, but he considered too long. Ryosuke turned around, noticed him and destroyed any chances Takumi had of getting out of this predicament.

“Good morning,” the older Takahashi brother said with a smile, looking absolutely not like he had just gotten out of bed. In fact, he looked as flawless as always when Takumi had seen him and the younger wondered if Ryosuke was even able to look anything less than perfect. A second later he cursed himself for thinking that. 

“Good morning,” he muttered back and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes as an excuse to cover his face with his hand and stop the other from seeing the blush that must have spread on his face.

_Embarrassing._

“Do you also want a coffee?”, Ryosuke offered and took a second cup out of the cupboard after seeing Takumi nod. Both were silent while they waited for the coffee machine to finish brewing. Takumi tiptoed over to the table and sat down with a little sigh. 

“Milk or sugar?”

“Both, please,” Takumi mumbled. A glance at the clock on the wall told him that it was 7:30 in the morning, a bit later than he had suspected. 

Ryosuke set down the cup of coffee in front of him and poured his own before sitting down on the chair opposite of Takumi. The silence that followed was slightly awkward and Takumi chose to stare at his cup to stop himself from looking at Ryosuke too much. Maybe it would already help if he stopped staring so much. 

The awkward silence dragged on for a little while and they both just sipped on their coffees until Ryosuke decided to speak up again. “Would you like breakfast as well?”, he asked Takumi and the latter shook his head quickly, truthfully telling him that he wasn’t feeling very hungry as was usual for him in the morning.

Ryosuke nodded thoughtfully, “I usually don’t care much for breakfast, either.” He stood up and took a wooden bowl filled with fruit from the kitchen counter and placed it on the table. “We should both still eat something, though.” He took a tangerine from the bowl and started peeling it, and Takumi silently obliged and chose an apple that he bit into without much appetite. 

Watching him, Ryosuke chuckled lightly, an amused sparkle in his eyes as he thought about something. He gave Takumi a conspiratorial look and spoke with a slightly lowered voice, “Keisuke loves breakfast, but he rarely ever gets up before lunch.” 

Takumi smiled at that while internally his hope of being saved from this slightly awkward situation was snuffed out. Talking to Ryosuke was difficult even when the other did most of the talking, and when Keisuke accompanied them, at least not all the attention was on Takumi. 

He had to admit that he liked being alone with both of the brothers and watch their banter. They were famous and often acted detached from everyone around them; they were in their own sphere, but he was allowed to witness them the way they were away from the attentive eyes of the outside world. It felt like a privilege to see what these two amazing people were like behind their public personas, and it gave Takumi the feeling of _belonging_ even though he had concluded that this specific feeling was really dangerous for him. He thought back to the conversation he had with Keisuke after he arrived here. What if he – no, what if they both eventually, inevitably lost their interest? What if Ryosuke noticed what Takumi had found out about himself and the way he felt- 

The little bit of appetite he had left him, and he stared at the half-eaten apple miserably before forcing himself to take another bite so Ryosuke wouldn’t ask any uncomfortable questions.

Everything was too overwhelming, and Takumi struggled against the feeling in his chest that felt like nausea-but-not-quite. Both brothers were attentive. They would see right through him in no time and all his struggling to get his feelings under control would be for naught. Why did his brain have to be like this? Why did he have to fall for Takahashi Ryosuke of all people? He hadn’t even noticed he was falling until he was already two feet away from a harsh impact on the ground.

_‘I’m pathetic. Really pathetic.’_

He was so lost in his miserable thoughts that he almost bit into the core of the apple before noticing that he had already finished it. Startled, he checked if Ryosuke had noticed anything, but the other seemed oblivious to Takumi almost taking a hearty bite full of apple seeds. 

“Um...”, Takumi began and cleared his throat, hating how hoarse his voice was sounding. Ryosuke looked up at him and then at the apple core. “Ah, of course.” He held out his hand for the core and stood up, throwing the rest of the apple and the tangerine peel into the trash underneath the kitchen sink. Then he checked his cup for any leftover coffee, and, upon finding none, went to pour himself a second one. Takumi quickly drank the rest of his own coffee and watched Ryosuke moving around in the kitchen.

_‘Don’t stare.’_

It probably was impolite to leave when the other hadn’t even started drinking his second cup of coffee yet, but Takumi couldn’t stand being in this room any longer. He needed some time alone to cool down his head.

“Ryosuke-san? May I use the shower?”

Ryosuke had turned around and now a small smile played around the corners of his mouth. “Of course. You don’t need to ask such things, Fujiwara. You can use the shower or the kitchen or what else you might need at any time.”

“Thank you,” Takumi replied quietly and got up, supporting his weight by leaning on the table. He could feel Ryosuke’s eyes follow him as he tiptoed towards the door, slightly wavering in his steps. 

“You will need to take those bandages off…”

“Yeah, all right…” Takumi started walking into the direction of the guest room, but Ryosuke beat him to it. 

“You can go to the bathroom already. I’ll get your things from your room so you don’t have that extra way to walk.”

There was no point in arguing, so Takumi just nodded thankfully and was glad when Ryosuke disappeared through the door and couldn’t watch him miserably staggering towards his destination. On one hand he hated having to rely on both brothers so much, but on the other hand he couldn’t help slowly getting comfortable with it. Fortunately, Ryosuke wasn’t being as touchy-feely as his brother. If he were, Takumi would probably dissolve into a miserable puddle of shame.

He opened the door to the bathroom and walked in, deciding to sit on the edge of the tub to wait. This room was at least twice as big as the bathroom at home, and yesterday Keisuke had casually mentioned that he could just let his things lie around here because this room was used rarely because there were two other bathrooms upstairs. _Two_ others. It was pointless to dwell on this, Takumi knew, but he couldn’t help it. Maybe it was good if he continued to remind himself how much he did not belong into their world...  
He bent down to carefully unwrap the bandages around his feet and could hear Ryosuke’s steps approaching. 

“Here you go,” he said upon entering and placed the little pile of clothes on the stool that stood next to the spacious shower. Takumi felt a bit flustered at the thought of Ryosuke rummaging through his things, but he had been the one to bring them here in the first place and Takumi seriously doubted that his father had moved one finger and helped him collect the necessary items.

“Thank you,” Takumi replied without looking up as he freed his feet of the bandages. Ryosuke lingered for a moment and Takumi waited for him to say something, but eventually the other left the room and, in closing the door, told him to “call for me when you need anything.” 

Like hell he would, but Takumi nodded anyway. He did absolutely not intend to call for help unless a fire broke out in the bathroom or he suffered a sudden stroke, in which case he likely wouldn’t be able to call anything anyway. With no small amount of relief, he turned the key in the lock, glad to be alone for a while. 

He hobbled back towards the tub and sat back down with a sigh. Walking was more difficult and uncomfortable without the bandages protecting his feet, and the wounds itched horribly. That probably meant they were healing. Takumi lifted his foot and rested his right leg on the other so he could take a look at his injuries, something he knew he probably shouldn’t do but couldn’t resist out of both morbid curiosity and the desire to actually know what had happened to him. Until now he didn’t have a chance to look, but the pain that walking caused him should really have prepared him for how bad it was. The cuts criss-crossed across the entire sole of his foot. They were already scabbed over, but some of them looked deep and Takumi knew instinctively that they would leave scars behind.

He couldn’t help the wave of nausea at the thought of how someone had done this to him while he was unconscious… What reason did anyone have for this? What did he do wrong?

His fingers clenched around his ankle to the point of hurting and he relaxed them upon noticing. With a few deep breaths he calmed down a bit and looked at his other foot. Same picture, as expected. 

He got up, more slowly and carefully than before, took off his clothes and tentatively got into the shower. Under the warm water, his panic washed away until he was only left with a feeling of slight lingering terror. Again he was glad that he was alone because he couldn’t stand being around someone else or explaining himself right now. 

Standing on his feet hurt, so he quickly turned off the water after the initial rinse. Ryosuke hadn’t packed any of his shampoo or anything like that, so Takumi figured he had to use the products that were already there. He only hoped that nobody was going to get angry at him for using their stuff as he hurriedly washed the shampoo out of his hair, blinking when some of the soapy water got into his eyes.

Normally he didn’t take long in the shower, but today he decided to drag it out a bit and use the time he had. He sat down on the floor carefully and sighed in relief when the weight was taken off his feet. The gentle spray of water made him tired as he sat there. He needed time to think, that was all. Why was all of this happening to him? Why was he so vulnerable, why was he in love, why couldn’t he do anything against any of this?

Takumi fought against the choking pressure in his chest, but to no avail. He didn’t feel the salty tears running down his cheeks amidst the water of the shower, but he felt the small sob bubbling up his throat and couldn’t hold it back.

_‘Why am I crying?’_

He leaned back his head and let the water wash away the tears. The sobs quickly subsided into sniffles and then into nothing, and Takumi took a few slow, deliberate breaths.  
He would be okay. He could handle this. Ryosuke would never know because he _couldn’t let him know_ , and the wounds would heal. He would get over this and leave it behind.

With a sudden surge of defiant resolve, he turned off the shower and staggered to his feet. A clean towel had been left for him by Ryosuke and Takumi dried himself off quickly and got dressed, knowing that he had spent too much time in the shower already. 

As if on cue, somebody knocked on the door. “Are you alright?”

Takumi figured that either Ryosuke was overly worried or that he had been in the bathroom for way too long by now. “Yeah, I’m fine,” he replied and swept a part of the mirror clean of steam to check if his face showed any obvious signs of him crying before unlocking and opening the door.

Ryosuke did indeed look a bit worried, but his expression quickly shifted into his usual neutral one upon seeing that Takumi was, indeed, alright.

“Can I come in?” He gestured with the objects in his hands, which were a roll of fresh white bandages and what looked like a tube of salve.

_Oh._

“Yeah,” Takumi said uncertainly and stepped aside. Ryosuke entered and looked at him expectantly. “Could you sit down on the tub again?”

Takumi obeyed and reached for the bandages and the salve, feeling like he knew what he was supposed to do. Ryosuke, however, had a different idea. He didn’t hand the items over to Takumi, who retracted his hands awkwardly upon realising that. Instead, he kneeled down on the carpet in front of him, laid down the roll of bandages next to him, and lifted Takumi’s right foot.

Takumi almost _flinched_ and felt his breath get stuck in his throat. It took all his willpower combined with the knowledge that walking still hurt to not yank away his foot and make a run for the door. 

_‘Why is he doing this?’_

His confused panic went unnoticed by the other, or Ryosuke simply wasn’t fazed by it. He calmly unscrewed the tube of salve and squeezed some onto his finger. 

“It needs to be bandaged again to protect the wounds and help with the healing. Could you hold still for a moment?”

Takumi stared silently and flinched a little at the cold of the salve but was otherwise too petrified to move or even talk as Ryosuke started to carefully spread the ointment across his wounds.

It felt inappropriate to sit here and let the other proceed just like that. The action felt way too intimate for what their relationship was, and it made Takumi hope and yearn helplessly to deepen their connection and experience more moments like this one. 

This wasn’t something you’d do for an acquaintance or _whatever_ they were. Did he not know that? No, he _had_ to be knowing what he was doing. If there was anything he knew about Takahashi Ryosuke, it was that he didn’t do anything without a reason.  
It might not be Ryosuke’s intention to be cruel, but this was too much. Takumi didn’t know what to think anymore, one half of him painfully hopeful and the other screaming at him that he was being delusional and reading too much into their interactions…

Had he found out? Was he trying to mock him for his hopeless attraction?

No, he wouldn’t do that. Right? _Right…?_

“Ryosuke-san?”, Takumi uttered weakly.  
“Almost done,” was the only reply as Ryosuke gently, but firmly wrapped the second foot in new bandages as well. “There we go.” 

He secured the end with a band-aid to stop it from unravelling and finally stood up again. “This should make it easier for you,” he said with a warm smile and extended a hand to Takumi, who took it and let himself be helped to stand up without question as he was still too stunned to do much else than move along. 

For a moment, Ryosuke’s expression turned into something soft before it returned to normal and he let go of his hand. 

The moment was over and Takumi took a deep breath, feeling ashamed for overreacting the way he had. This just happened because Ryosuke was going to be a doctor and knew what to do, right? 

“Do you want to go lie back down?”

Takumi nodded numbly and gathered the clothes he had worn to sleep in his hands before tiptoeing back towards the guest room, silently letting Ryosuke support him with a hand on his shoulder.

By now Takumi was convinced that the other didn’t even know how cruel he was being. There was no way he would do this on purpose, knowing of the hopes that he had… He wasn’t that cruel. Takumi refused to believe he was that cruel.

He didn’t know if that made it better or worse. Ryosuke’s kindness and care confused him and got his hopes up.

He didn’t know if he would survive much longer in the other’s company without blurting out the truth about his feelings.

It was as if someone had heard his non-verbalized prayers and decided to have mercy, because when he had finally gotten that walk of shame behind him and laid back down in his bed, Ryosuke looked at his watch and sighed. 

“I have classes today,” he explained with a glance at Takumi. “I’m a bit late on my schedule already.”

He chuckled a little and smiled apologetically. “Will you be okay for a while? I’m sure Keisuke will wake up soon anyway. If he doesn’t, just throw him out of bed. He will be angry, but you can blame it on me.” 

Takumi found it in himself to smile back a little. “I’d rather not have to do that.” He was incredibly relieved to have some distance from Ryosuke to think this all over again with a cool head and hoped that Keisuke wouldn’t get up too soon either, because while he greatly preferred the company of the younger brother at the moment, he hadn’t forgotten about the carrying ordeal and all the shenanigans that Keisuke had pulled already and the effect they had had on him. How could he forget that?

Still. A bit of distance was good. Everything would look different in a few hours after he had thought about it. He really needed to stop overreacting. It wasn’t like him to act like that. 

“Oh, I’d love to see how that would play out,” Ryosuke said with mirth in his eyes and tore Takumi out of his thoughts. He walked towards the door, but turned around once again before leaving. “Take care. I’ll see you later.”

“Later,” Takumi mumbled, but Ryosuke was already out of the door, seemingly in a hurry. Takumi leaned back and sighed in relief. 

He heard the front door close and reached for a magazine that one of the brothers had left on the bedside table for him. There was plenty of time for him to work this out.

_‘I will be fine.’_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeeeeeeeaaaaaaaahhhh Takumi, that was definitely all totally platonic. Totally.
> 
> I can't believe it took me eleven chapters to actually have a character cry! Crying in the shower! A classic! I'm sorry. The words started flowing and then he was crying. You know how it is. Aaaaaaanyway...  
> Aside from the fluff that may or may not be in the next chapter, it also may or may not be Keisuke-centered. I'm sorry I had him sleep through all of this.
> 
> A very persistant headcanon of mine is that Keisuke is the only one of the three who regularly gets an acceptable amount of sleep, even if it's because he often sleeps until noon.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Keisuke finally wakes up, discovers that his brother seems to have fucked up again, and finds that he actually really enjoys not being alone.
> 
> Takumi, to no-one's surprise, just can't catch a break.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the fluff I promised! I can't believe that I have to split this chapter _again._ I'm sorry that this is short.
> 
> But here's Keisuke once again managing to be more considerate than his brother all while being way more oblivious as well. Oh, Keisuke...

Keisuke disliked mornings.

When he slowly blinked awake on this day, a single ray of sunshine fell through a gap in the curtains and right onto his face, blinding him. He rolled over and made a frustrated noise at the realisation that he was awake and wouldn't be able to fall asleep again. Judging by the position of the sun (exactly in the wrong place) it was midday already and Keisuke felt that he was hungry, so he peeled himself out of his bedsheets and sat up groggily. With one hand he pulled on one of the curtains and squinted angrily into the sunlight. Why did getting out of bed have to be the worst part of the day? It meant he always started off in a bad mood.

Keisuke yawned and threw on some clothes before leaving his room and traipsing down the stairs. A look on the clock in the kitchen told him that it was almost 11 am and the fact that it was a Thursday told him that Ryosuke must have already left for his afternoon classes. He looked over at the kitchen counter and saw that instead of the usual one coffee cup drying next to the sink, there were two of them today. 

He frowned a little and needed a moment to remember the probable reason.

_'Oh, right. Fujiwara.'_

Where was he, though? Keisuke shuffled over to the guest room that he deemed the most likely place to find Fujiwara, and he was proven correct. The other was laying in his bed, dressed and hair still slightly damp from taking a shower. He was reading in one of the magazines Keisuke had left there for him in the likely case he'd get bored and looked up when he greeted him.

"Good morning," Fujiwara replied and placed the magazine back on the bedside table. "How late is it?"

"Eleven." Keisuke tilted his head and inspected Fujiwara more closely. The younger looked shaken somewhat, but maybe it was just his imagination as he just got up. "How long have you been awake?"

Fujiwara seemed to consider the question for a moment. "Since seven… I think." 

"Ew," Keisuke said and gave the younger a pitying look. Did he imagine that as well, or was his teammate even more short-spoken than usual today? 

He remembered the two cups next to the sink and asked, "Did you have breakfast?"

"Yeah."

"With aniki?"

"Hm."

No, Keisuke didn't imagine it. Something was amiss again. Why did this always seem to happen after his brother and Fujiwara had talked to each other without him around? Maybe he shouldn't leave them alone with each other anymore. 

"Did something happen between you two?"

Fujiwara looked increasingly uncomfortable. "No."

Keisuke didn’t believe him but decided to let it go for now. Fujiwara could be stubborn and when he acted like this there was no way to get a word out of him. 

Keisuke remembered that he had visited the kitchen to get some food into his stomach.

"Are you hungry?"

Fujiwara shook his head no, but Keisuke wasn’t willing to accept that answer this time. Even if the other had eaten breakfast together with Ryosuke, it would have surprised him if they’d actually eaten much. He also didn’t want Fujiwara to get bored to death while he messed around in the kitchen.

"Okay, what about this. We both eat something – don't look at me like that, you're not skipping lunch, aniki tries to do that all the time already – and then we go for a drive."

Fujiwara frowned. "It's midday."

"I wasn't planning to race on Akagi in broad daylight, if that's what you were thinking," Keisuke snorted, "Seriously. I'm not that stupid."

"So where do you plan to go then?"

"Dunno. Somewhere. It's better than sitting around all day, don't you think?"

Fujiwara shrugged, but Keisuke had already made up his mind. "C'mon," he said and tipped his head in the direction of the door. His teammate hesitated for another second but ended up relenting.

"Fine." More quietly, he added, "You're probably right, anyway." 

Keisuke gave him a brilliant grin. "Of course I am."

Fujiwara glared at him while he stood up, but it didn't seem to be out of actual annoyance. It was a given that the guy had to be bored as hell from all the resting and waiting without being able to do anything. Rest was good, but so was diversion, and Fujiwara looked like he really needed some of the latter right now. Keisuke watched as the other carefully tested how much weight to put on his injured feet. He didn't miss the little wince that accompanied the action and there it was again; the slightly choking pressure in his chest that wasn't quite guilt, not quite sadness and not quite anger, but a strange mixture of all of those emotions. He didn't know what to do with it.

They left the room, Keisuke walking next to his teammate in a pace that was slow enough to be awkward, but he didn't want to leave him behind either. Fujiwara staggered a bit and frowned at the ground, biting his lip in frustration. Keisuke offered him his arm as support wordlessly, but his friend didn’t seem to be willing to accept his help. 

Keisuke wished he knew what to say in a situation like this (Ryosuke would probably know, his brain unhelpfully supplied). What would he himself want to hear if he were the injured one? He'd probably not want to hear anything at all. 

"You okay with leftovers from yesterday?", he asked as nonchalantly as possible when they walked into the kitchen, trying to pretend that the last few seconds didn't happen. Fujiwara shrugged. "I don't care," he said, still with a hint of frustration in his voice.

"Leftovers it is, then." Keisuke opened the fridge to gather his ingredients while Fujiwara sat down at the table, probably not intending for the other to hear his small sigh of relief. Keisuke pretended he didn't. 

A delicious smell spread through the room as Keisuke started heating up the rest of yesterday's dinner. He heard no sounds coming from Fujiwara, who was sitting silently and fumbling with his hands. Keisuke hated the silence, so he turned on the radio and hummed along to the song that was playing quietly while he finished preparing their lunch. It was weird, really. Normally on days like these when Ryosuke had to leave for university in the morning, Keisuke would leave the house as well as soon as he could, get takeout food from somewhere and avoid returning for as long as he could. Fujiwara's presence made Ryosuke’s absence much more bearable and Keisuke could imagine that staying at home with Fujiwara would be okay if the other was in a better state. It was still a bit strange to have his teammate here, but Keisuke could feel himself getting used to it. Really, it was puzzling.

He remembered clearly the look his brother had given him after announcing that he had asked Fujiwara to become his new team's second driver. _"Be decent to him,"_ that look had said. Back then Keisuke had still been majorly pissed at Fujiwara – impressed by the other’s skills, yes, but mainly pissed. Why did it have to be _him_? That question was unnecessary, because Keisuke knew that it had to be Fujiwara and nobody else. Nobody else had managed to beat them both. Nobody else had showed the necessary skills needed to keep up with one certain White Comet's expectations. 

So upon hearing that Fujiwara had said he needed time to think, Keisuke had done something he thought he had to do way too often: Wait halfway down Mt. Akina in the wee hours of the morning to catch the guy alone and talk some sense into him. 

Thinking back to how angry he was at the other for beating him and having him make a fool out of himself, it was surprising how quickly started getting along with Fujiwara once Project D had started in spring.

If someone had told him before that point that he would end up preparing lunch for Fujiwara at home one day, he would have laughed at them because that idea was ridiculous.

It didn't seem very ridiculous now that it was happening, and Keisuke thought that he'd enjoy it a great deal more if the circumstances were a bit different. 

A sigh escaped him, and he stopped humming as he filled two bowls with rice and carried them to the table, pushing one in Fujiwara's direction before taking the pan off the stove and putting it in the sink. When he turned around again, Fujiwara was still fiddling with his thumbs. Keisuke couldn't help but stare at the movement of his hands for a moment and remember how he had held them back in the hospital and how soft his skin had felt under his fingertips. He itched to intertwine his fingers with Fujiwara's, to make him stop fumbling and also just to see how he would react. But instead of following this impulse, he simply sat down at the other side of the table. 

"Enjoy your meal."

"Thank you."

They ate in silence after that, but Keisuke still thought it to be an improvement over eating alone. When both of them had finished their meal (Fujiwara a lot slower than him, Keisuke noted), they prepared for their afternoon trip. Keisuke didn't miss the yearning glance that Fujiwara shot the car keys as he picked them up from the chest of drawers in the hallway. He probably missed driving as much as Keisuke would if he were injured and not allowed to. Ryosuke would probably be a bit pissed that he took Fujiwara out for a drive when he was supposed to rest and heal, but honestly, fuck that. Ryosuke underestimated how tedious it was for a guy like Fujiwara to stay in bed and do nothing all day. He deserved some diversion.

The two of them exchanged a look when they stood at the front door clad in their jackets. "You know what I'm going to say now," Keisuke began. Fujiwara looked away, seeming slightly flustered. "Yeah. Don't say it. Just go ahead."

This time, Keisuke didn't hesitate as much as the first time when he had picked up Fujiwara and carried him across the paved path that led from the front door to the spot where he parked his car. Fujiwara had been lighter than expected and seemed to fit into his arms perfectly, but thinking about that brought up that weird feeling again that Keisuke liked to ignore. 

Fujiwara was pointedly trying to avoid meeting his eyes and blushing furiously. It was kinda adorable, but Keisuke decided not to drag this out too long for the sake of the poor guy’s dignity. It had been trampled way too much lately. He was still feeling a bit disappointed when the moment came that they reached the car and he had to set Fujiwara down in order to stop anyone from noticing that he might have been enjoying this a bit too much for it to be just a noble gesture towards an injured friend. 

He briefly leaned over the younger when carefully setting him down in the seat and almost had to force himself to finally let go of him. He noticed that he could smell his shampoo in Fujiwara's hair and decided with a small grin that he liked it. It was really puzzling how these little things about Fujiwara made Keisuke, well, _happy_ somehow. He couldn't describe the feeling as anything other than happiness, because he had a hunch that he wouldn't like the result if he thought about it more intensely. 

Once again he found himself wondering how Ryosuke felt about this situation. Did he also notice these little things about Fujiwara that just ended up making him all the more angry about what had happened to him? Keisuke knew that his brother felt protective of sorts about his downhill ace; he had noticed that much over these past few days. It actually seemed to him like weeks since they had found their teammate and friend tied up and injured in an abandoned factory hall, something that hadn't been supposed to happen and that would definitely end up irrevocably changing something about their relationship with Fujiwara, whether he liked it or not. Concerningly enough, right now Keisuke seemed to like it as he got to spend more time around the fascinating human being that used to be the bane of his existence. It was abhorrent, really, and Keisuke felt incredibly guilty as he finally leaned back again with an apologetic smile and walked over to the driver's side door.

Fujiwara was his friend. And that was enough. 

It _had_ to be enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I write a new chapter, it often comes down to a difficult decision because I don't get as much writing done as I'd like: Do I post what I have written now to keep up my lax posting schedule, potentially making the chapter lose some meaning because I chopped off an important scene that I will then put into the next chapter? Or do I try to finish everything I have planned which might give the chapter more integrity, but needs more time? I usually go with the first option because I don't want to let you guys wait and because there's the danger that I get stuck on a chapter the longer I'm writing on it. Posting the first part usually helps me avoid hitting a wall with my writing.  
> I know that most of you probably prefer to wait longer and get longer chapters for it. Unfortunately, I'm not sure if I can do that at the moment. ^^"


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keisuke and Takumi spend a pleasant afternoon together until it takes a turn for 'unpleasant'.
> 
> Featuring detailed descriptions of eating cream puffs and not-so-detailed descriptions of Ryosuke's scheming.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't have much to say this time aside from: Enjoy reading (and leave me a comment if you feel up to it)!

Takumi leaned back in his seat and looked out of the window, absentmindedly fiddling with the hem of his shirt. The two of them were on their way towards the city now and Keisuke had gone oddly quiet ever since he started the car and they left the estate. It left Takumi in a strange position because it was usually Keisuke who would strike up a conversation. Takumi wasn’t very good at that. He would have been fine with the quiet between them, but it felt uncomfortable this time and when he inconspicuously looked to the side, he could see a somewhat tense expression on his teammate’s face. 

Really now. Shouldn’t that be _him?_ He was still feeling embarrassed, after all, and it was all Keisuke’s fault. 

Well, maybe it was more his own fault. There was no need to get so embarrassed, was there? It reminded him of his overreaction to Ryosuke bandaging his feet this morning-

Damn. He wanted to get that out of his mind. And now he was blushing again at the memory. 

He shifted in the seat and sneaked a glance at Keisuke again. The latter noticed him looking this time and met his eyes for a moment before concentrating on the road again.

“Something wrong?”, he asked and broke the uncomfortable silence in the car. 

“Nothing’s wrong.”  
_'…with me, that is.'_

Keisuke nodded absentmindedly. “Say, Fujiwara…”, he said after a short moment of silence, “are you actually… okay with this situation?”

Takumi gave him a look of confusion that he didn’t see because he was currently busy making a left turn. “Huh?”

“I mean… We kinda roped you into staying at our house. Did you ever really agree to that?” Keisuke was biting his lip, Takumi noticed. He was surprised at the question. Why did he ask him that now? The second day of his stay was already half over. So why now?

“No,” Takumi replied truthfully. “But did I complain?”

Keisuke scoffed at that. “You never complain about anything aniki says.”

“Oi!”, Takumi exclaimed and lightly punched his teammate’s shoulder. At the same time, he could feel his face heating up again. Why did the topic of Ryosuke always come up again? In addition to that, Keisuke’s remark included some unnerving implications. Did the other know that Takumi had a dumb crush on his older brother?

_Oh God, please, no._

Keisuke laughed at Takumi’s reaction, the tense expression finally dropping from his face. “It’s kinda adorable, you know,” he teased, and Takumi buried his face in his hands with an accompanying groan. “Please shut up.” 

“You’re blushing,” Keisuke determined with a grin after glancing at him. Takumi mumbled at him through his fingers to shut up again. _Please don’t let him know._

Thankfully, Keisuke dropped the topic after chuckling at his reaction one last time, and Takumi dared to raise his face from his hands again. They were still on their way through city traffic and he remembered that they also still didn’t have any set destination. 

“Um… Keisuke-san, do you know now where we’re going?” 

Keisuke thoughtfully drummed his fingers on the steering wheel while they waited at a red light. “Hm… What about some dessert first?” 

“You have something in mind?” 

“I do,” Keisuke confirmed and turned his head to smile at Takumi briefly before he noticed that the traffic light had turned green in the meantime. “I think you’ll love it,” he said as he stepped on the gas and turned into the right lane that led into the city. 

After another five minutes of driving, Keisuke stopped the car in front of a shop that appeared to be a small bakery. It was tucked away in a side street, but despite the location it seemed to be pretty popular and Takumi spotted several customers entering or leaving the little shop. 

“Give me a few minutes,” Keisuke said and got out of the car, walked into the bakery and returned about ten minutes later, triumphantly holding up a pastel-coloured paper bag for Takumi to see. 

“Damn, that was a real struggle. Why are there so many people in the city today? It’s Thursday!”, he complained as he got back into the car with his delicious loot in his hands. Takumi didn’t comment and stared at the paper bag with interest. Keisuke reached inside and presented a round piece of pastry, covered in masses of powdered sugar. It looked very sweet, but also delicious and Takumi didn’t hesitate for a second when it was proffered to him. 

When he bit into the pastry, powdered sugar rained all over his lap. Takumi cursed, prompting a laugh from Keisuke. “Yeah, it’s a bit difficult to eat,” he admitted as he watched Takumi trying to wipe away the mess he had made. 

Takumi grumbled indignantly and gave up his efforts, choosing to bite into the pastry again instead, more carefully this time. Whatever it was, it tasted amazing. The dough was light and fluffy, and it was filled with some sort of vanilla cream. It was one of the best things Takumi had ever eaten. Honestly, he could eat this every day. 

Keisuke started to dig in into his own pastry as well and sighed in pure delight. “It’s been ages since I last had one of these.” He took a little break of eating to look over at Takumi and smiled. 

“You have cream on your chin,” Keisuke said amusedly, and Takumi quickly wiped at his face, blushing at the other’s fixed stare. “Wrong side,” Keisuke laughed, leaned over and brushed his thumb over Takumi’s chin like this action was the most normal thing in the world. Takumi almost dropped his cream puff and only narrowly avoided making an even bigger mess. Retracting his hand, Keisuke chuckled again and handed him the paper bag to catch the sugar that inevitably fell off the pastry every time Takumi bit into it. “Here. Try not to make my car look like there has been a snowstorm inside.” 

Takumi responded to his teammate’s teasing grin with a pout. His heart was still beating a bit faster than it was probably supposed to be. Seriously, one of those brothers would eventually end up causing him to die from a heart attack. They never even gave him a chance to properly recover after moments like this one. If only they were a little less unpredictable… 

Or Takumi was simply terrible at reading people. That could also be the case. 

This day was just one shock moment after another. He had thought it was only Ryosuke, but both brothers acted so oddly… dare he say _affectionate?_

This had to be either some kind of tasteless prank or they were always like this with others in private…  
Takumi didn’t like either of those thoughts. What exactly _was_ he to them? 

He frowned while finishing the rest of his cream puff. Keisuke must have noticed his sour expression because he asked, “Everything alright? Do you not like it?” 

“I do like it,” Takumi said quickly and stuffed the last bite into his mouth so that Keisuke couldn’t get the idea to snatch it from him. 

“Good to hear.” Keisuke had dimples when he smiled, and Takumi had to look away again. It was unfair, really, that lately he noticed things like that. “I don’t go here that often. Thank you for giving me an excuse to do it.” Keisuke winked and started the engine again. 

“Thank _you_ for the food. Those things were amazing,” Takumi said as the blond pulled out of the parking spot. He didn’t ask where the other wanted to go now, but Keisuke told him without having to hear the question. 

“Well, even though it’s daytime, what do you say we visit Mt. Akagi anyway?” There was a thoughtful look on his face, and Takumi turned his head to look at him. “Akagi?”, he repeated. 

“Don’t worry, I still don’t plan to race in broad daylight. But I like it up there. It has a nice view over the city. And you have only seen it at night yet, right?” 

Takumi nodded. 

“Let me show it to you then.” 

Looking straight ahead again, Takumi kept quiet as Keisuke turned left on the road that led towards the mountain that was his home territory. He still felt awkward riding with the other, and it was still so hard to get used to. He remembered what Keisuke had said about him and Ryosuke. It scared him to think that he might be that obvious about his affection, or rather had been even before admitting it to himself. 

A mess. This was a real mess. How was he supposed to survive the rest of Project D like this? And neither Ryosuke nor Keisuke made it easy for him. 

They drove up the mountain pass now and Takumi recognised the road that he had raced on a few times, even though it did look very different in daylight. Keisuke stayed true to his promise and didn’t attempt to make this an impromptu race, though he did drive up the mountain a good deal faster than a normal driver probably would. This was his home course, a road he could probably drive in his sleep, and it clearly shone through in the way he maneuvered his car around the corners skilfully. 

Takumi suddenly felt a strong and almost unbearable urge to drive again. It was the best way for him to forget everything else that was happening around him and take his mind off the things he struggled with. He wanted to compete with the one currently sitting next to him again. He wanted to join that endless battle again, the one that always came down to either one of them doing something new and challenging the other with a nonverbal “You think you can do that too? Show me.” 

When they arrived at the summit, Takumi was fidgeting in his seat and frowning. He hoped Keisuke didn’t notice his agitation. Takumi knew that he had to take a break, but damn, it was so _frustrating!_

_______

Keisuke hadn’t noticed. He was concentrating on something else.

“Shit, what are all of these people even doing outside today?”, he cursed and looked around for a parking spot amidst all the cars that were already here. A lot of people who wanted to enjoy the nice weather, but Keisuke felt no sort of sympathy because they blocked his path and made it practically impossible for him to park close to the lookout point, which pretty much ruined all his plans seeing that Fujiwara couldn’t really get out of the car in his current state. 

He resigned with a huff and pulled into the next free space that he saw. From here you could only vaguely discern the city between the trees that weren’t blocked by cars, but it had to do. “Today is a bad day for this,” he grumbled. Fujiwara next to him shrugged. “Bad luck.” 

Keisuke was glad that the other wasn’t too disappointed, but he still wondered why they came all the way up here now that they couldn’t really do anything. They’d have to stay in the car. 

Keisuke opened his door, and Fujiwara sat up. “What are you doing?” 

“Letting some air in. It’s warm today.” 

Before the other could react, Keisuke leaned across him and opened the door on his side as well. 

“I could have done that myself!”, Fujiwara spluttered as Keisuke leaned back again. 

“Too slow,” he grinned and watched the way Fujiwara was lightly blushing again. He had to admit it was fun teasing him. The other looked like he was scrambling for something to say before settling for “Do you come here often? Outside of racing, I mean?” 

Keisuke shrugged. “Aniki and I used to come here often to enjoy the view. Back before he started studying and when I was still…” 

He trailed off at the last words and it was silent in the car for a while, besides the sounds that drifted in from outside. Fujiwara seemed to wait for him to continue talking, but he didn’t plan to. Great. Now he had ruined his own mood. 

“Can I ask you a question?”, Takumi suddenly spoke up. 

“That depends on what the question is.” 

“Uh…” 

Keisuke shook his head, “Just go ahead.” 

Fujiwara looked at him for a moment, then asked, “Why did you start racing? You never told me.” 

Keisuke grimaced. Fujiwara seemed to possess the talent to ask the wrong questions at the wrong time.  
“That’s a bit of a long story. Let’s talk about it another time, alright?” He hoped that would deflect any further questions for now. 

Fujiwara frowned, but nodded. 

“You never really told me how you started racing either,” Keisuke added. “Why did _you_ start racing?” 

“It doesn’t seem very fair if I tell you about that now when you refuse to talk about it,” Fujiwara retorted with a pout. 

“Well, you did tell me and aniki once that your skills come from delivering your father’s tofu or something. So basically, I already know about it.” 

“Why are you even asking then?” 

“I want details, of course!” Keisuke folded his arms, leaned them on top of the steering wheel and rested his head on them. Fujiwara was still pouting at him, but Keisuke really didn’t want to talk about that topic right now, not in bright daylight on a crowded parking lot. He would very likely tell Fujiwara about it eventually, but right now it felt wrong to do it. Fortunately, he seemed to have been successful in getting the attention away from himself. Fujiwara took the bait. 

“You know that my old man made me deliver the tofu to the resort on Mt. Akina in the middle of the night ever since I was thirteen,” he said. 

_Thirteen._ That man had to be insane to let his son do that. But anyway. 

“Yeah, I know that,” Keisuke said impatiently. “But how did that turn into racing?” 

“I wanted to do it as fast as possible to go back to bed,” Fujiwara deadpanned. 

Keisuke stared at him. “So, essentially you learned how to drift and all that stuff just because you wanted to get some more sleep?!” 

“Yeah.” 

“How could you even fall asleep after that? After the first time I experienced the downhill at full speed, I think I couldn’t sleep for three days or something. Too much adrenaline.” 

Fujiwara just shrugged. “I had school the next day,” he said as if that explained everything. That guy was really something else. Keisuke shook his head as he imagined a thirteen years old version of Fujiwara speeding down Mt. Akina in his father’s old 86. Totally insane. 

They were silent again for a while as Keisuke dwelled in his thoughts. Racing had always been a necessity to Fujiwara. No wonder that he had been annoyed when racer after racer started to challenge him. 

“Is racing still a chore to you?” 

“No. Not anymore,” Fujiwara answered immediately, without thinking. “I like it now.” 

“I’m glad to hear that,” Keisuke replied and angled his head to look at his teammate and rival. “I would hate it if my greatest adversary raced only out of obligation and not out of enjoyment,” he said with a little wink. 

Fujiwara remained serious as he met his eyes. “I know how much racing means to you. Thank you for showing me this world that you love so much.” 

Keisuke blinked at him, surprised at his words. Then he let out a short laugh. “You have aniki to thank for that.” 

But Fujiwara simply shook his head. “He merely gave me this opportunity. _You_ were the one who convinced me to take it.” 

Keisuke’s thoughts braked to a screaming halt as he tried to process what the other had just said to him. Had he really heard that right…? An odd warm feeling spread from his chest through his body as he stared at Fujiwara, who looked back at him calmly. He thought he knew what that feeling was. 

_Affection._

Fujiwara really never ceased to surprise him. He never would have thought that one day he’d come to be thankful for that night on Mt. Akina where his pride was shattered but he found something so much more important. 

He was at a loss for words. 

But Fujiwara didn’t seem to expect an answer. He leaned back in his seat and looked out of the open door at the families and other people walking across the parking lot or the small cobbled paths that led to the forest. They were once again both silent, but Keisuke found it comfortable as he continued to regard his teammate appreciatingly. 

Takumi was amazing. 

He would have liked to tell him that to his face again, but something held him back. Instead he lifted his head again, unfolded his arms and slowly got out of the car. He could feel Takumi’s questioning glance on his back, but he simply wanted to stretch his legs and Takumi didn’t say anything, so he didn’t, either. 

He stood next to his FC and looked around, leaning on the roof of the car and watched the people standing at the railing to enjoy the view over the city. His phone buzzed in his pocket. 

Did Ryosuke want something? Keisuke took his phone and looked at the message he received, stared at the ugly little sentence displayed on the screen. 

__

_taking the dog out for a walk?_

For the tiniest moment, Keisuke was confused. Just a second later he understood.

Boiling hot fury rose inside him and destroyed the quietness he had enjoyed just a moment ago. This message told him two things. First: They seemed to have his number, too. Second: They were watching them. 

He searched the vicinity with alert eyes, trying not to be too obvious so that Fujiwara didn’t notice. There were so many people and cars around that it was difficult to make out anything suspicious, but it didn’t take Keisuke long to spot a few cars that stood out from the rest. For a trained eye it was easy to tell the cars of street racers apart from generic ones, and Keisuke saw the stickers on their back doors. 

Three of those cars stood there, and as Keisuke remained motionless in his rage, fingers tightening around his phone dangerously, the guy standing next to one of them met his eyes. 

And held up a mobile phone with a grin. 

Keisuke fumed at this direct provocation. Those guys didn’t seem to fear anything at all, and Keisuke had to try really hard to stop himself from walking over there and beating them to a pulp. But they knew what they were doing, at least to a point, because they confronted him here in a populated space in broad daylight where it would be foolish of him to cause a scene. 

But Keisuke could wait. They had made a mistake in messing with Takumi and they would learn that soon enough. With a snarl, he got back into his car and slammed the door closed. Takumi on the other seat jumped at the sudden sound. 

“What’s going on?” 

“We’re going back,” Keisuke said, trying to keep his voice calm. “It’s gotten late already, and aniki will flip his shit if we’re not home for dinner.” 

Takumi looked at him weirdly but closed his door as well and didn’t comment as Keisuke pulled out of the parking spot maybe a bit too fast. 

He resisted the urge to just run those fuckers over and set off into the opposite direction. He had recognised them by their stickers and remembered racing them once back in his RedSuns times, though they hadn’t been very notable. 

_'Too bad for you, aniki,'_ he thought grimly as he sped down the mountain, _'Now I know who they are, too.'_

_____

Some distance away in the city, Ryosuke prepared to go home just as a phone call reached him. He looked at the caller ID and raised his eyebrows before answering the call.

“Fumihiro?” 

"Ah, Ryosuke. Sorry, I hope I’m not disturbing you. I almost expected you to still be in your classes.” 

“They just finished, actually. What is the reason for your call?” 

He heard his friend sigh into the phone. “It’s about that thing with Fujiwara.” 

Ryosuke’s eyebrows wandered even higher at the phrasing. _'That thing'?_ Normally Fumihiro took a bit more care with his choice of words. At least he got straight to the point as well. 

“Rumours are spreading, Ryosuke. I don’t know how word got out, but I heard other teams are talking. Maybe they got suspicious after I postponed that race, I don’t know. I’m sorry.” 

Ryosuke smiled faintly at the news but quickly remembered that Fumihiro couldn’t see it through the phone. 

“Don’t worry about it, Fumihiro. It plays into my plans quite well, actually.” 

“Are you scheming again and not telling any of us… again?”, his conversation partner scolded after a short pause, but Ryosuke heard the humour in his words. 

“Maybe,” he answered, smiling mysteriously. 

“So that’s a yes.” 

“Don’t turn my words around in my mouth. I said 'maybe'.” 

“That’s a yes coming from you if I ever heard one.” 

Ryosuke chuckled at their little banter, his mood having improved upon receiving the news. 

“See you, Fumihiro.” 

“See you,” his friend answered. “And be nice to Fujiwara.” 

“Will do,” Ryosuke replied and ended the call. He walked the rest of the way to his car with a satisfied smile on his face. This had been unplanned to happen so soon, but he wouldn’t complain about his plans coming along faster. 

He decided to stop by at a certain place on his way home. There could be no harm in a little gift after all, could there? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woohoo, what an ending!
> 
> Great job at always trying to seduce Takumi with food, Keisuke.  
> He's still kind of in denial, but he knows what to do. Love goes through the stomach, after all.  
> ("Affection can be platonic, can't it be?" Yes, it can! But not for you, not in this story!)
> 
> I hope you didn't find all that dialogue too tedious. It's so difficult to make long dialogues interesting and avoid repetitiveness. It's definitely something I still need to work on. I usually keep the dialogue in my stories to a minimum for this exact reason. ^^"


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keisuke is already in a difficult mood, but then he discovers something else that he doesn't like. Ryosuke has given up on trying to be subtle. We have some more hardcore pining in this chapter, as well as both brothers unwittingly starting a contest of who can get Takumi embarrassed faster.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I felt secondhand embarrassment while writing this. Please, you two. This isn't how this works. Stop. 
> 
> I still had fun writing it and I hope you enjoy reading! I'm so thankful for all of you that are sticking around! (Yes, now I'm going to kindly ask for comments again. They power me. They nourish me. They are my writer's fuel.)

The drive back was a lot quieter than earlier. The sun was beginning to set and Takumi blinked into the light. It would be autumn soon, which meant that Project D’s end was approaching as well. They didn’t actually have that much time left, even though Ryosuke was downplaying the fact. Takumi wondered what would come afterwards. Neither of them would probably have much time to meet up anymore, especially Ryosuke once he started his residency. 

Takumi sneaked a glance at Keisuke, who had gone suspiciously quiet and seemed tense ever since their hurried departure. Maybe he was thinking about something similar, though Takumi had no way of knowing exactly. 

When Keisuke pulled into his family home’s driveway, still neither of them had said a word. Takumi sagged in his seat a bit as the other got out of the car. He had genuinely enjoyed the afternoon, weird as it had been. It was the first time he had really done anything with either of the Takahashi brothers that didn’t have anything to do with racing directly, and he kind of wished that would happen more often. It likely wouldn’t though. He would heal enough to drive again, and everything would go back to the way it was before, at least until winter came around. 

He didn’t complain as he was lifted out of his seat by Keisuke for the third damned time and no, it wasn’t because he had gotten used to it. It was still nerve-wracking, especially because Takumi didn’t find it as humiliating as he probably should. Just like with many other things, he was irrationally starting to get comfortable. He seriously couldn’t decide anymore whether he wanted to let it all continue like this or wanted to get out of here as soon as possible to get away from the danger that was Ryosuke’s proximity. And the way it was, Keisuke didn’t help either. Takumi suddenly asked himself if-

A small sound from Keisuke that could have been a curse or merely an exhale of breath pulled him from his thoughts. He looked in the direction of the house. There was light on the upper floor and he could see the dark outline of a person standing on the balcony against the artificial light of the windows behind. 

_Oh no._ Another observer was the last thing he needed right now. Especially if it was…

“Aniki! Sorry we’re late,” Keisuke called out and Takumi saw Ryosuke lean against the railing. “I only just arrived as well,” the older brother’s smooth voice sounded through the garden. Takumi felt his eyes on him and tensed, thankful that Keisuke quickened his steps and hurried to get inside. “Aniki doesn’t like when I’m late for dinner,” he murmured, “It’s some sort of tradition that we eat together in the evening at least.” Takumi nodded in understanding and was relieved when he could finally set his feet back down on the wooden floorboards of the Takahashi residence. 

As he and Keisuke shrugged off their jackets, Ryosuke appeared at the foot of the stairs to greet them. Takumi met his eyes and the other smiled, not actually seeming to be very angry about them arriving late. “It seems like you two spent the afternoon well. Where did my brother take you, Fujiwara?”, he asked amusedly. Keisuke shot Takumi a warning glance and answered for him. “We just drove around a bit. And we went to the bakery that has those amazing cream puffs. Remember that one?”  
Takumi noticed that he left out the fact that they went to Mt. Akagi and decided not to point it out either. 

“I think I remember. It’s too bad that I couldn’t come along. Did you at least enjoy it, Fujiwara?” Ryosuke was still smiling at him, and to his own frustration Takumi had to acknowledge that he was getting nervous again. “Yeah. I liked it,” he answered quickly. Keisuke next to him snickered.

“In fact, he enjoyed it so much that he decided to spread half of it all over himself.” 

Takumi shot around and glared at him, blushing furiously. 

_Asshole._

Ryosuke merely chuckled. “I remember you doing the very same thing…”, he said, with the result that now both Takumi and Keisuke were sulking. 

“Never insult the one who’s going to make the food,” Keisuke grumbled and walked past the other two, not bothering to check if they were going to follow him.

“Oh, _excuse_ me. I forgot,” Ryosuke said and gave Takumi a conspiratorial little wink. The latter smiled and felt glad that the other wasn’t making fun of him for being so clumsy. Normally he could handle that kind of teasing (and he heard _a lot_ of it from Itsuki and the others), but in front of Ryosuke it felt really awkward. 

Satisfied with his reaction, the older man motioned for him to lead the way towards the kitchen, which felt awkward as well, especially once Takumi remembered that Ryosuke was probably keeping a look on him to make sure he wasn’t going to fall during his embarrassing tiptoe walking. His thoughts wandered back to the moment after the shower where he almost thought his heart would stop when Ryosuke started bandaging his feet.

_'Relax, dammit. He’s studying that stuff and he was trying to be considerate.'_

It was really time to reconsider how desperate he was getting and how to stop himself from making false assumptions and getting foolishly hopeful.  
He gracelessly flopped down on one of the kitchen chairs and Ryosuke walked over to where Keisuke was rummaging around to help him. 

Dinner was uneventful save for the glances that both brothers kept shooting him and that Takumi couldn’t read. He was trying his hardest not to think about certain things he didn’t want to think about right now and didn’t add much to the conversation they were having. Once he finished his meal, he failed to suppress a little yawn that the other two immediately caught on to.

“Tired already?”, Keisuke asked as he leaned forward in his chair and pushed his empty bowl aside.

“No,” Takumi sort of lied, and Keisuke glanced at his brother. “Hey, what about a movie night then? You don’t have to get up early tomorrow, do you?”

“Fortunately not,” Ryosuke answered and smiled. “I like the idea. We didn’t do that in a while now. What do you say, Fujiwara?” 

Takumi internally said goodbye to the idea of going to bed early. He didn’t want to prevent their time together, which he had found out was very important to both of them. He wasn’t certain whether they would go through with their plans for the evening if he declined, so he said yes. 

Both of them seemed delighted at his answer, and Ryosuke put away the used dishes while Keisuke went to the living room to prepare everything. Takumi excused himself and walked to his room to change into some more comfortable clothes but forgot about his incentive once he set foot inside.

The first thing he noticed was a vase with flowers on the bedside table that hadn’t been there before. He curiously stepped closer and inspected one of the scarlet blossoms. They looked a bit like roses on first glance, but upon looking more closely he saw that the petals were frilly at the edges. He thought he had seen flowers like these already. What were they called again? He thought for a second before coming up with the name.

 _Carnations._

“Fujiwara?” 

Takumi flinched when he heard Keisuke’s voice, as he hadn’t heard him approach. The other’s glance fell on the red carnations on the table and Takumi could see him frown thoughtfully for the fraction of a second before his attention was back on him. 

“You coming?”

“Uh, yeah,” Takumi answered and looked at the flowers one last time before leaving the room. There was no doubt in his mind as to who must have left them there. 

Why was Ryosuke so confusing?

_____

The culprit of the flower incident was waiting on the couch in the living room for his brother and Takumi to arrive. He didn’t have to wait too long until he suddenly heard shouting from outside the room, and he sat up in alarm before realizing that the commotion was of a harmless nature.

“KEISUKE! Let me down! _Now_!", Takumi’s unusually loud voice sounded through the hallway. Laughter followed, and the angry repeat of the demand. “I said: Let me down! Keisuke-san!”

Ryosuke could hear the smirk in his brother’s voice when he answered, “Hm… Maybe I will if you continue to just call me Keisuke.” 

He couldn’t resist the urge to look what was going on anymore, so he stood up and looked into the hallway, where he came face to face with the sight of a furiously blushing Takumi who was currently being carried bridal style by Keisuke and obviously not very happy about that. Keisuke laughed as Takumi punched his chest in order to get him to let him down, “No, really. I would like that a lot, _Takumi_.” 

The latter froze for a second before getting even redder in the face, if that was possible. Ryosuke stared incredulously. If this wasn’t flirting, he didn’t know what to call it. 'Extremely rude', probably. Did his brother really not notice what he was doing?

He decided that it was enough. “Keisuke. Stop it,” he demanded and glared at his brother, who shot a glance at him, still laughing, and decided that it wasn’t worth getting into trouble over. Without further comment, he set Takumi back on the ground. Ryosuke could see that the latter was angry and hoped that his mood for the evening wasn’t ruined. He gave Keisuke one more accusing stare before turning around and walking back to his place on the couch. Some part of him, he had to admit, had hoped that Takumi would be comfortable enough to join the two of them on the big couch, but he didn’t really believe in that anymore. 

Keisuke sat down at the other end of the couch and reached for the remote control while Takumi stopped and let his eyes wander uncertainly between the options he had. Ryosuke caught his glance and tipped his head to indicate that he was invited to sit down between them. Takumi glanced over at the second, empty sofa once again before making his decision and stiffly sitting down next to Ryosuke, who smiled at that and moved over to give him more space because Keisuke made no motion to do so.

Ryosuke found himself thinking about how nice it would be to be able to sit closer to him, maybe with an arm around his shoulder while they enjoyed each other’s company. If he did that now he strongly doubted that there would be enjoyment in it on both sides. Takumi was already sitting still like a statue, though just as Ryosuke thought this, he saw him relax a little and lean back into a more comfortable position.

“We need snacks,” Keisuke suddenly declared and stood up just as the title music started playing. When he left the room, it was quiet for a while save for the music and the sounds of Keisuke rummaging around in the cupboards.

Takumi turned to look at Ryosuke.

“Thank you… for the flowers?” He seemed uncertain, and Ryosuke smiled. He had been certain that Takumi had spotted them already. “See them as sort of a 'Get well soon'-gift,” he said and watched the shadow of some emotion that might have been disappointment flicker across Takumi’s face. Ryosuke hoped that he wasn’t well-versed in meanings of flowers. It was a risk he was taking, but so was acknowledging his affections and he had decided against better knowledge to do so anyway. He was getting careless, but it was difficult not to do so when he saw his brother do the very same thing. He wasn’t sure anymore whether Keisuke really had no idea what was going on, but it was difficult to watch him and Takumi interact and see how close they had become.

Speaking of the devil; Keisuke came back in with his arms full of snacks and dumped them all on the coffee table. He glanced at the TV, which still showed the title menu. “Thanks for not starting without me,” he said and flopped back down on the couch, taking the remote control and selecting the “start movie”-option.

Ryosuke didn’t find it in himself to concentrate on the movie that Keisuke had chosen; instead, his attention was on the fact that Takumi was sitting right next to him. He could hear him yawn quietly from time to time, from which he concluded that the other was tired and just didn’t say it. From some point onwards, Ryosuke wasn’t even looking at the TV screen anymore and instead watching an oblivious Takumi who was blinking and rubbing his eyes with increasing frequency as the evening progressed and only occasionally reached into the bag of chips when Keisuke offered it to him. 

Ryosuke forced himself to look away, and when he inevitably did look back, Takumi’s eyes were already closed and his chest was rising and falling with quiet breaths. He smiled softly and imagined what it would be like to have Takumi leaning against his chest while he slept and him then dozing off as well. He wondered if Takumi had done anything like that with someone already, maybe a girlfriend.

He exhaled a labored breath. Really, he could deal with it if Takumi had a girlfriend; at least that would show him that the other wasn’t interested in men. It would be immensely more difficult to accept if he had a _boy_ friend, but that would be manageable as well. But despite what Ryosuke tried to tell himself: Deep down he knew that he couldn’t handle it if Takumi ended up with Keisuke of all people, because that would make it impossible to ignore what _he_ couldn’t have. 

Glancing over at Keisuke, he realized that his brother was looking back at him. The movie had ended without him noticing, apparently. Keisuke glanced at the sleeping Takumi and let out a quiet, amused snort. “So he _was_ tired, after all,” he said softly, smiling at their teammate’s slumbering form. 

“Yes,” Ryosuke answered just as quietly. Keisuke got up carefully as to avoid stirring Takumi and stretched with a quiet yawn. “Honestly, I feel that. I’m going to bed. Good night, aniki. And good night to you as well,” he said to Takumi even though he knew the man couldn’t hear him. The two brothers’ eyes met again and Ryosuke decided that Keisuke was really lucky if he didn’t know of his feelings for Takumi. To be aware was like torture, but it was a burden Ryosuke would bear. 

Keisuke disappeared out of the room and Ryosuke heard him shuffle up the stairs. Only when he heard the door to the bathroom close, he allowed himself to look at Takumi again. He looked so peaceful that it almost felt like it would be a crime to wake him, and so Ryosuke didn’t. Instead, he only inched closer until their shoulders almost touched, and hesitated only for a little moment before softly brushing a strand of hair out of the younger man’s face. Takumi was beautiful. Ryosuke had to acknowledge that even though his bruises were still fading and even though it hurt him to acknowledge. He was beautiful, and he wasn’t even aware of it. 

Ryosuke already knew that it was painful to be uncertain and to want something badly that you couldn’t get, or rather, where the chance of getting it was so small that a miracle would be needed to make it happen. 

But he was determined not to let this dull ache become a festering wound like it happened with his feelings for Kaori.

Even if he didn’t love him back, Takumi was here, and he was alive. And that was something Ryosuke was already indefinitely thankful for.

_____

Unbeknownst to Ryosuke, he hadn’t been the only one to look.

Just outside the door that was open by only a crack stood Keisuke, just having returned from his trip to the bathroom to check whether his brother and Takumi were still sitting on the couch where he had left them. They were, and Keisuke’s breath hitched at what he saw.

Ryosuke leaned forward and _kissed_ Takumi. Not on the lips, but on the forehead and then a second time on his temple in a gesture of unlimited affection. Keisuke couldn’t bring himself to look away from the intimate scene, even though he knew he probably should.

Interestingly, his first thought was, _'what a sap.'_

His second thought was something uglier, accompanied by a feeling like he was being choked. He didn’t know for sure whether it was jealousy or betrayal, but it brought him to a realization that felt like someone had dumped a bucket of ice-cold water over his head. 

He was jealous. 

Not for aniki’s attention, like he might have been a few months earlier. 

The meaning of that was quite clear.

He turned around and walked away as quietly as he could, climbing up the stairs and retreating into his room, all the while pretending that his fuzzy sight didn’t stem from the tears that were building in his eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The plot thickens!
> 
> Seriously, Ryosuke is going off the rails. He and Keisuke definitely need to talk about this.
> 
> See you next chapter...
> 
> Edit: I forgot to add the meaning of red carnations. I don't expect all of you to google it, and flower meanings differ from source to source anyway.  
> According to all our best friend Wikipedia, carnations stand for "fascination, distinction, and love" in the Japanese form of flower language.  
> Red carnations in particular can stand for "deep love and affection", which seems to be a pretty international meaning (they can also symbolize a mother's love, or the international workers' movement and socialism, but that was **not** what I wanted to express here. ;)  
>  Tl;dr: Red carnations are probably the most romantic flowers possible right after roses ~~and Ryosuke has been there, done that already and also roses are overrated anyway~~


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the evening ended less-than-satisfactory for the involved parties, it's up to Ryosuke to fix things once again. Or maybe it's Keisuke's turn this time?
> 
> Sibling Support Level: 10/10
> 
> Drama Level: 12/10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Back at it again just in time to bring you a new chapter! I had a spectacularly shitty week, but it's gotten better by now and I found that writing this fic works really well as a way to vent. 
> 
> Enjoy! (And if you have the time, consider leaving me a comment and tell me what you think!)

Ryosuke had heard the hurried steps up the stairs and sat up hastily, knowing the damage was done. Takumi next to him stirred to life, startled by his sudden movement. He made a sleepy little sound in his throat that Ryosuke would have found adorable if he hadn’t been too busy cursing himself for throwing his cautions aside, and frantically trying to come up with a plan to mend things with his brother and explain himself.

“Huh… Did I fall asleep?”

Takumi blinked a few times and Ryosuke forced himself to smile at him, though he didn’t feel like smiling at the moment. “Yes, you did,” he affirmed softly and watched as Takumi shook off the last remnants of sleep, looking around to see that they were alone and that the movie was already over.

“Oh,” he said and looked somewhat apologetic, “I think it’s better if I go to bed then… Where’s Keisuke-san?”

“He already went to bed not too long ago,” Ryosuke lied and saw Takumi shoot him a glance, blushing slightly. 

“You could have waked me,” he mumbled and stood up from the couch. He had no idea of the emotional turmoil he caused, Ryosuke mused silently. Even now it was difficult for him not to follow his desire to embrace the younger driver, seeing his sleepy form making him want nothing more than to fall asleep next to him. If only the issue with Keisuke wasn’t there, he might have reached the point where he would give in and ask Takumi to do just that…

But there was Keisuke to consider. And as selfish as Ryosuke knew himself to be, he couldn’t bring himself to betray his younger brother that way. 

So instead he said, “Good night,” and followed Takumi with his eyes as the latter made his retreat. His walking was looking less clumsy already, which came as a relief for Ryosuke. He knew he had overstepped a line by kissing Takumi while he was asleep, even if it was "only" on the forehead and temple. Worse than his thoughtless action was only the fact that Keisuke had seen it. What must he be thinking now? 

He hesitated only for a short moment after Takumi had left, not feeling prepared for talking to Keisuke, but knowing he had to. He wasn’t even sure what to say for once. Justify himself? Apologise? 

He rubbed his temples and sighed before standing up as well, angry at himself for allowing this to happen. He felt like he had taken advantage of the situation, of Takumi’s momentary vulnerability and Keisuke’s presumable cluelessness regarding both of their feelings. Keisuke certainly had an idea what was happening now. Ryosuke prided himself on knowing his brother better than anyone else, and while Keisuke wasn’t fast about picking up on things concerning other people’s and his own emotions, he wasn’t so dense not to realize what was going on upon seeing his normally so detached aniki kiss someone. And that would get him thinking.

Why did it have to come to this?

The answer to that question was an easy one, Ryosuke thought has he made his way up the stairs quietly. It was the same reason that made the last time he had harboured feelings for someone a tragedy. It was the fact that he didn’t have control over himself and couldn’t keep his emotions where they belonged. It was his fault that Takumi got hurt, it was his fault that Keisuke was hurt. He should have been more alarmed back when he had first felt his control on the situation slipping. It was his responsibility to keep these two people that were more important to him than anyone else happy, and he was failing. 

Failure had never been an option for him. But he had failed many people already, when he thought about it. Keisuke, Takumi, and Kaori were only the beginning, but they were the ones that hurt him most. 

After Kaori’s death, he had managed to get himself back under control quite quickly, a fact than one Hojo Rin had spent years resenting him for. But he had known what to do. He had known that there was no way of fixing anything. Moving on was the only thing he could do.

He didn’t know what to do now. He had been needing to mend things with Keisuke once before, but the situation had been a different one. Their parents had been the ones to blame for what Keisuke had gone through, but Ryosuke was certain that if he had done something sooner, if he hadn’t been too concentrated on himself to notice how much his little brother was hurting, then the situation wouldn’t have escalated as it did.

And now he had made the same mistake again. 

He needed to fix this. He didn’t know how, but he needed to fix this.

“Keisuke?”, he asked quietly and knocked on the door to his brother’s room.

_____

Keisuke heard the knock on his door and cursed himself for not locking it, but he had never grown into that habit. Hell, he couldn’t remember the last time he had even felt the need to lock his brother out of the room. It just felt wrong to do so.

He stayed where he was, hidden under his covers, and pretended to be asleep when he heard the door open and Ryosuke walk in. 

“Keisuke.”

He didn’t show any reaction, but he doubted that his brother would fall for the act.

“Keisuke, I know you’re awake.”

Yeah. That was to be expected.

He begrudgingly turned around to face his brother even though that was about the last thing he wanted to do right now. But there was no way around it, and if Ryosuke wanted to talk, they had to talk.

So he had noticed that he had been seen.

It was still difficult for Keisuke to wrap his head around. His aniki liked Fujiwara – that sounded ridiculous to him, but the longer he thought about it, the clearer it all got. All the inconspicuous touches, the pats on the shoulder, the kinds of things that Ryosuke just didn’t do with everyone. Only with him – and with Fujiwara.

And the carnations. He had given him _carnations!_  
He had honestly considered it to be one of Ryosuke’s antics at first. How stupid. What kind of guy just brought a friend a giant bouquet of carnations?! Not even Ryosuke would do that.

He wasn’t usually this affectionate with people.

It was probably a good thing that he never had a girlfriend, at least none that Keisuke knew about. There had been this one thing with that woman named Kaori or something, and Keisuke didn’t like to remember that because it had been about the only time that he had ever seen Ryosuke cry. 

Accepting the fact that his brother had feelings for Fujiwara was almost more difficult. But it explained the weird atmosphere between the two after they had been alone for a while, and the almost nervous way Fujiwara acted at times, and of course those _kisses._

They had probably been a couple all along, and he had been too stupid to notice.

He hated that thought. He still hated that thought, and he hated to admit why he hated it, and he hated the fact that he hated so much.

He should be happy for his brother, really. He had always had problems opening up to other people and letting them get close. And in a way, he _was_ happy for him. But he also _hated_ all of this. And it all mixed into a furious storm of emotions in his head.

It wasn’t that much of a surprise that he liked Takumi as well. When he thought about it, it seemed only natural. It had been like this a lot of times; Ryosuke did something, and Keisuke followed. That was fine, really. It was fine as long as it wasn’t developing feelings for the same person. 

_Why_ Fujiwara?

_Why Takumi?_

“I don’t want to hear about it,” Keisuke said, finally, after a silence that dragged on for too long. 

“It was not-“

“Don’t try to tell my that it _wasn’t what it looked like!”_ , he hissed. He knew what love looked like. Or at least, he had a very good idea what it looked like for his brother.  
“I’m okay with it, you know. It’s not like I’m going to tell the whole world that you’re gay for each other,” he continued bitterly.

Ryosuke was silent again and Keisuke hated that, too. Where was the smartass, _logical_ retort? Keisuke knew there was some logic behind this, after all. He might be an emotion-driven person, but he wasn’t dumb. Ryosuke got what he wanted, that was just the way the world went. Keisuke knew he was being unfair, but right now he was too bitter to care.

“Keisuke…”

Ryosuke sounded like he didn’t know what to say, and that was unfair as well, because _of course_ he had already figured out what was going on here. If he was really okay with it, Keisuke would have probably teased him about his relationship at this point, and his aniki knew that.

“I’ll be fine,” Keisuke croaked and turned back around, “Just leave.” 

“No,” Ryosuke said resolutely, sounding a lot firmer than just a few seconds ago. “Keisuke, please listen to me.” He walked closer and laid a hand on his brother’s shoulder, who angrily batted it away.

“I don’t want to hear about it,” he repeated and refused to face his brother, not wanting him to see the tears that were already gathering in his eyes again. 

“Please,” Ryosuke said again, softer this time. Keisuke kept quiet.

“I did something I shouldn’t have done. I’m sorry.”

Keisuke’s eyes went wide at that. His brother hated having to apologize. “What for? I don’t see anything wrong about what you did. Really, it’s okay. I’ll manage,” he retorted weakly, wishing for Ryosuke just to leave him alone for once.

There was a sigh. “Fujiwara and I are not involved,” Ryosuke simply said, still in that strange soft tone of voice. He sounded… hurt. 

And Keisuke understood.

“So he doesn’t know? At all?”, he asked, laying completely still.

“I highly doubt it. I feel sorry that I couldn’t contain myself and you had to see it.”

“Oh, it could have been a lot worse,” Keisuke mumbled, but finally rolled over again to meet his brother’s eyes. 

He was definitely hurt.

“I shouldn’t have done it. It was inappropriate.”

Keisuke sat up on his bed and kept quiet for a while, thinking over what his brother had said. Takumi had really been asleep and oblivious to what happened. But that didn’t explain the things Keisuke had mulled over earlier. 

“Maybe he doesn’t know,” he said, “But that doesn’t mean it’s unrequited. I mean, I’m not blind. I see the way he’s looking at you. It’s all making sense now.” It was difficult for him to say all of this, but he felt better afterwards. Ryosuke had no ill intentions. This wasn’t his fault. 

Ryosuke didn’t answer and walked over to the window instead, opened it and looked out into the dark night. The trees around the house swayed in a strong breeze, black silhouettes against the starry sky. Keisuke couldn’t see his brother’s face, but he could imagine that wistful expression on it that had also been there after he had been defeated by Takumi. The moment back then had been very similar to this one. Keisuke wondered if Ryosuke had already felt something back then. 

Suddenly, he spoke up again. “I really doubt that as well,” he said quietly, and Keisuke felt sad for him for some reason. He felt sad for himself as well, though _'disappointed'_ was probably the better word. Both of them believed that there was no hope that their feelings could be returned. But Ryosuke was Ryosuke. If not him, then who?

Keisuke shook his head and answered his question himself. There was probably some cute girl somewhere that Fujiwara was involved with. He thought he had heard some rumours about it once, but he hadn’t paid them as much attention as he probably should have. 

He got up and stood next to his brother, studying his face in the dim light that fell in from outside. There was a deep sadness written across his features, one that looked foreign on him. It reminded Keisuke of an evening years ago when his aniki had suddenly stood in the doorframe, as pale as a ghost and looking so very breakable. Only later Keisuke had heard about the person that he lost; another hopeless love. It was probably in that moment that Keisuke realised that despite everything, Ryosuke was still only human. It was so easy to forget about that. 

After their mother had left and their father continued not to give a shit about the two sons he had sitting back home, each of them had chosen a different path to cope with it. Keisuke had stopped giving a shit about what others thought of him as long as he had their attention, sending him deeper and deeper down into a spiral of another fight, another detention, skipping school altogether and finally becoming bosozoku and losing himself in the thrill and the violence until he forgot that he was alone.

Ryosuke, on the other hand, had started his pursuit of perfection. He became the perfect son, the perfect heir, all so that their father would spend a glance at him, and he didn’t allow himself any slack until he had become almost a carbon copy of their old man; efficient and uncaring. 

Keisuke had been too busy spending time on his goddamn inferiority complex to notice that his genius brother was just as lonely as him. 

It was honestly no wonder that neither of them was good at dealing with all this shitty emotional stuff. 

“Do you have a cigarette?”, Ryosuke suddenly asked, much to his brother’s surprise.

“I thought you quit,” he said while already fumbling for the pack that he stored in his bedside drawer.

Ryosuke chuckled. “I did. But I think right now I need a little exception,” he stated and gratefully accepted the cigarette his brother offered to him. 

They stood in silence as Ryosuke lit his cancer stick and took a deep breath. Keisuke laughed quietly, “You know, for a future doctor you have a lot of unhealthy habits.”

“That’s not the first time someone tells me that.”

“Figures,” Keisuke snorted, and they were quiet once again. He lit a second cigarette for himself and stared out into the night just like his brother did. 

“I never thought you were into men,” he finally said. 

Ryosuke glanced at him and chuckled. “Likewise. But I’m not. Not really, at least.” 

Keisuke didn’t really know what to make of that. “You and your cryptic answers,” he sighed, and despite not looking, he could almost feel how Ryosuke’s mouth curled into a smile.

Honestly, the fact that his prim and proper aniki might be bi as well wasn’t as shocking as it could have been. It was just another reminder that Ryosuke wasn’t the perfect son he often pretended to be. It was kind of relieving.

Keisuke himself had never spared the matter much of a thought, actually. At some point he had just somewhat concluded that he was bisexual, and that was it. So what if he sometimes thought a guy was hot? It just happened from time to time and didn’t bother him much. He also wasn’t going to deny that Fujiwara fit into that category very well. He knew that he found him attractive, had accepted that long ago. Not the first time he saw him, but maybe after the third or fourth; after he knew what kind of person he was on the road…

But it was one thing to think a guy was hot. Falling in love with one was a very different story.

Thinking back on it now, he felt stupid for not being prepared for this to happen eventually. 

_'And of course it had to be Fujiwara. Who else,'_ Keisuke thought wryly and wondered if it had been the same for Ryosuke, or if his brother had other experiences of that kind before falling in love with Takumi. That was definitely a weird thought. And guessing from what Ryosuke had said about “not really being into men,” Keisuke doubted it.  
“How do you mean that?”, he asked when Ryosuke still did not bother to explain himself. 

“Let’s say that it’s a bit different from what you probably have in mind.”

Keisuke rolled his eyes, which went unnoticed in the dim light. “Come on. That’s not helping.” He nudged his brother’s side. “Now that we’re already here pouring our hearts out to each other, what’s there to lose?”

Ryosuke shook his head slightly and breathed a little laugh. “What I mean is that while I have to say that I am attracted to both women and men, this attraction does not manifest itself in the way that it does with most other people. It’s purely limited to the romantic sense of the word.”

Keisuke almost groaned out loud in his exasperation at the shitty over-complicated language his brother was still using. But he kept quiet, because he thought that he started to understand, and something told him that Ryosuke would get to the point soon. And indeed, he did.

“What I’ve been meaning to say is that I do not feel any desire or lust for anyone,” Ryosuke finished his explanation. Now that was pretty straightforward for once.

“As in, never?”, Keisuke inquired.

“Yes.”

“Ah,” he replied lamely. No wonder that his aniki had tried to talk around the topic. It wasn’t exactly easy to discuss.

“It’s okay if you don’t understand.”

Keisuke stubbed out his cigarette in the ashtray on the windowsill and glowered at his brother. “Don’t be like that. I know what you’re trying to tell me. So, you’re asexual or something?”

“That’s what it could be called, yes,” Ryosuke answered, sounding mildly surprised. He stubbed out his cigarette as well and closed the window as Keisuke stepped back. His brother being asexual was another revelation he didn’t expect to have this evening. It didn’t make the situation less complicated, but it was _something._

“But it didn’t help me in any way,“ Ryosuke continued wryly, “Look where we are now.”

With that, he brought the topic back to the problem at hand. Keisuke grimaced. 

“You love him,” he stated and watched as Ryosuke flinched a little upon hearing it from him in such an unadorned way. His aniki sat down on the bed with a heavy sigh and wrung his hands like he still didn’t know what to say. Keisuke sat next to him and joined him in his staring into nothingness. 

“Takumi is all I can think about,” Ryosuke suddenly spoke up and Keisuke took note of how he openly used Fujiwara’s first name. “Everything comes back to him in a way. I don’t know what to do about it.”

That, Keisuke could identify with.

“It feels like I’m completely losing control, piece by piece,” his brother almost whispered, “and it’s terrifying.” 

He turned his head to look at him, and Keisuke stared back, almost recoiling at the raw emotion he saw in his brother’s eyes. 

“Keisuke, I’m scared.”

_Shit._

Keisuke was forcefully reminded of how important it was to recognize that Takahashi Ryosuke was only human as well. The last time he had remembered that was back when that thing with Kaori had happened, and damn, _of course_ Ryosuke was afraid of something like that happening again. Oh, fuck. Keisuke felt bad for being angry at him for something that was out of his control. 

It was like their father, leaving his sons to their own devices and then expecting a twelve-year-old to be equipped to deal with it. 

But that was the thing with Ryosuke: You expected something of him, and he _performed._ Every time, without failure, until it came to the times when he gave himself some freedom to live out his feelings and it backfired. Really, it was no wonder that he thought he was going to fuck up again. 

“I think that’s normal, aniki… And I think it’s okay.” What he said had sounded way less weak in his head.

Ryosuke looked at him. “But you _do_ feel the same way, don’t you?”

Keisuke considered his next words carefully. It was time for him to be honest as well.

“I’m also scared, I think. But I’m – don’t take this the wrong way, it’s just – I think I’m scared of you. I can see how deep your feelings for Takumi are, and it makes me worry that I can’t keep up with that. Hell, I didn’t even know that I liked him that way until earlier! I’m scared of my emotions being just too shallow in comparison to yours, and that Takumi can be never happy with them.” 

There was a trace of shock in his brother’s expression, before it left and made way for a sad smile. “I don’t think that your ability to be honest with your emotions could ever be too shallow for anyone, little brother.” 

“Aniki…” 

“I admire you for that, and Takumi as well,” Ryosuke said. He leaned his head back and looked at the ceiling in thought, about the only place in Keisuke’s room that wasn’t plastered with random stuff. “I can’t even begin to describe what I feel for him. It’s like he exists outside of any logic, and he fascinates me.”

“I want to give him everything he could ever want or need.” He looked back at Keisuke and smiled again. “But I don’t have to tell you that, because you already understand, don’t you?”

“I…”

Keisuke stared back at him wide-eyed, then let out a short bellow of laughter.

“Damn.” He leaned back and ran his fingers through his hair, feeling his brother’s eyes on him. “We’re in _way_ too deep, aren’t we?”

“I guess you could say that.”

Keisuke thought back to the sight of his brother kissing Takumi like he was the most precious thing in the world. Damn, now he was getting corny as well. But it was true in a way. And understanding that made him somehow feel less jealous. 

One thing was certain now: They both loved Takumi.

But what were they going to do about it?

This one time, Keisuke doubted that his aniki had an answer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I re-read the entire fic again a few days ago and I found a continuity error. It's not a major one, but it's there and it's bothering me and it's not that easy to fix. I'll figure out what to do about it.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Ryosuke has a lot of thinking to do (as if that's new) and an unexpected character makes an appearance!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Did you miss me? With a little delay now here it is, a bit shorter than the last chapters, but I'm happy with it! I hope you enjoy!

It was Friday, it was late in the morning, and Ryosuke was already sitting at his writing desk again, still having some things to prepare for his seminars later today. Keisuke was, of course, still asleep, and not even Takumi had emerged from his room yet. Even if he was awake, Ryosuke didn’t plan to disturb him. 

And besides, as mentioned, he still had things to do. Things that weren’t 'potentially finding a sleeping Takumi and not being able to resist kissing him'. 

Dear lord, this had to stop.

Ryosuke was still angry at himself, especially now that he realised that he couldn’t concentrate on his work at all. Yesterday’s events and especially the conversation with Keisuke always ended up being at the forefront of his mind again, coming back stronger every time he tried to shove them away. 

He groaned, deciding that it was no use. Leaning back in his chair with a sigh, he went back to thinking about how to possibly resolve this situation. Keisuke was probably expecting a solution as well, and he wanted nothing more than to come up with one.

The situation with Takumi had the potential to ruin everything. Ryosuke was as surprised as he was relieved that he had been able to smooth things over with Keisuke before a real conflict had the chance to begin, but that still left the root of the problem: Both of their feelings for Takumi. And unfortunately, there just wasn’t some magical solution for that. Ryosuke felt like he had played out all possible scenarios in his head and none of them had an ideal outcome. Takumi was not interested? Generally hurtful, possibly interfering with the Project. Takumi was not only not interested, but weirded out or disgusted as well? Definitely ruining the Project. Takumi returned his feelings? Keisuke would be hurt. Takumi returned Keisuke’s feelings? As much as he didn’t want to admit it, _he_ would be hurt. 

Takumi never finding out about any of this? Unlikely with the lack of control he displayed lately… And Keisuke was no difference. 

_'Maybe Keisuke would really deserve this more than I do,'_ he thought. He had often seen the way his brother’s mood lightened around Takumi, and the careful consideration he treated him with lately that seemed so unlike Keisuke. And the way he had talked about his feelings yesterday had shocked Ryosuke a bit. Well, to be fair, they had probably both shocked each other during that conversation. But Keisuke had proven to have a level of understanding about their feelings that Ryosuke had not expected from him. 

But in the end, this wasn’t about who _deserved_ to be with Takumi.

He shouldn’t forget that the only one who actually had a say in this was Takumi himself. 

Ryosuke sighed again, shaking his head and trying to finally return his focus to the pile of papers in front of him. But suddenly, the ringing of his phone distracted him from this purpose.

He was mildly annoyed about getting disturbed in his work (even though he hadn’t been able to work anyway, but the thought counted) and considered not answering the phone, but the annoyance quickly turned into surprise after taking a look at the caller ID. “Well, what a rare occasion,” he mumbled to himself before accepting the call. “Takahashi Ryosuke here.”

There was a little pause before the person on the other end of the line answered. “Hello. This is Sudo Kyoichi,” a gruff voice greeted without much politeness. 

Ryosuke couldn’t suppress an amused smile. Whatever his rival’s reason for calling was, it was only natural that he didn’t busy himself with needless politeness. He had always been that way, in all the time Ryosuke had known him. 

“Sudo. Interesting that I hear from you now. To what do I owe the honour?” 

He heard the little scoff through the phone and smiled to himself again. It must surely be something important if Sudo Kyoichi felt it necessary to call him personally. It would definitely be a crass misconception to call them friends; maybe 'begrudging acquaintances' would be the correct term. Ryosuke didn’t like Sudo and his arrogance, but he had to admit that he respected his skill and he assumed that Sudo thought about it the exact same way. At least Ryosuke couldn’t deny that he got some childish enjoyment out of annoying his long-time rival over the phone.

“I’ll get to the point. Wouldn’t want to drag this out longer than I have to,” Sudo answered. Ryosuke had a pretty good idea as to why he was putting his obnoxious ego aside long enough to call him. “So, about your little prodigy driver, that kid in the Eight-Six… Is it true what I’ve heard about him?” 

Ryosuke had suspected correctly. Leaning back in his chair, he sighed and decided to start being serious. “That depends on what you’ve heard. But I assume that we are on the same page here. As to answer your question: Yes. He’s currently… incapacitated.” 

“Hm. I’ve heard about it from someone who heard it from someone and so on. There are a lot of speculations going around. Some say that he could be retiring completely.” 

“That would be news to me.”

“So he will drive again?”

Ryosuke furrowed his brows. Did he just hear a hint of relief in Sudo’s voice?

_'Heh. Who would have thought?'_

He smirked. “Yes. Everything else is gossip without any foundation.”

“Good for you,” Sudo said gruffly as if he suddenly remembered that he was supposed to be impolite towards him. He was silent for a moment. Ryosuke almost thought he would end the call, but finally the other spoke up again. “Do you know who it was?”

_'I see, now we're getting to the core of the topic.'_

It was a very convenient foundation for what Ryosuke had planned to do anyway. 

“I do. And that reminds me of the favour I wanted to ask from you.” 

Sudo grunted indignantly, but said, “Then tell me. Whether I’ll humour you depends on what the favour is.” 

Yes, Ryosuke had already had his doubts about that – but with the relief that he knew he just heard, he was now certain that Sudo would be willing to help, pride aside.  
So he told him about a certain racing team from Akagi, not really that good, beaten with ease back in the RedSuns days. As Ryosuke had found out, they raced elsewhere as well nowadays – and they had _unusual_ methods of dealing with a humiliating loss. 

“Never heard of them,” Sudo said, sounding pensive. “I don’t think they’ve ever shown themselves around here either.”

“I don’t want to see them race anywhere around here ever again. I want them to have to leave Kanto completely.” Ryosuke couldn’t keep the harsh edge from his voice completely.  
There was a pause on the other end of the line again. “I see,” Sudo finally said. 

“You understand what I’m asking for.”

“I do. Listen, Takahashi, you know I’ve heard the rumours. So have a lot of others here. So has probably every single street racer in the entire Kanto region by now. I doubt that anyone will want to have to do with people like that anyway, whether I encourage them to or not.”

Ryosuke was slightly taken aback. His talk with Fumihiro didn’t make him suspect that the news would have spread that far already. “But you will do it?”, he asked nonchalantly, just to make sure. 

“Yes,” Sudo answered. “But to make one thing clear: I’m not doing this as a favour to _you_. This is only because people like them don’t deserve to be street racers. I wouldn’t want those scumbags on my turf, anyway.”

“Of course.”

“Hm. Tell that kid that he better gets back on the road as soon as possible. There are too many big-mouthed amateurs emerging lately.”

Ryosuke almost laughed. The fact that Takumi had even Sudo Kyoichi allusively admitting how good he was really spoke for something. It was a good thing that he was so humble.  
On second thought, that was likely part of the reason.

“I will let him know,” he replied. “And thank you for the favour.”

“Not a favour for _you_ , Takahashi, don’t forget that. We’ll meet again, and then I’ll show you that you have nothing to back up that arrogance of yours.”

Ryosuke smirked. “Understood.” He didn’t think it was necessary to mention that the other had tried that twice already and a third time would change nothing about the result if Sudo didn’t change some basic principles of his strategy. 

Sudo huffed. “Good. Now this has dragged on for too long already. I hope I won’t have to listen to your voice too soon again. See you on the touge.”

Now Ryosuke really couldn’t suppress a little laugh. “Likewise. Goodbye.”

“Bye,” Sudo grumbled and hung up. 

Still amused, Ryosuke placed the phone back in its designated place and gave himself a little moment to muse about this call before directing his attention back to the papers in front of him. It had certainly been enlightening, and Ryosuke was very pleased with the way that his plans came along. He didn’t really consider them revenge, more like… how had Sudo put it? _"I wouldn't want those scumbags on my turf, anyway."_

A sentiment that Ryosuke agreed with. As a racer, he thought that people like that didn’t deserve to be racers. As Takumi’s team leader and mentor, he thought that Takumi and the rest of the team needed to be protected from possible future incidents. As a friend to Takumi, and, of course, as someone who was in love with Takumi, he _did_ like to think of it as revenge. And he couldn’t deny that he sometimes did feel inclined to just let Keisuke deal with them and see how they liked that. 

But that was a train of thought he really needed to set aside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, who would have expected that! Kyoichi making an appearance as well, though only on the phone. I had a bit of a problem with how to spell his name. At first I thought it was "Sudoh" but then I checked and found out it was Sudo. Or, more correctly, "Sudō". That would technically be transcribed to "Sudou Kyouichi", but I didn't do that u-after-the-o thing with Ryo(u)suke either for some reason, so I felt like I needed to stick with that. But "Sudo" looks a bit weird to me...  
> Ah, well. That's a very minor problem anyway. Did I confuse you? ^^" 
> 
> (Psst, I haven't fixed the error I talked about last time yet either. I'll get to that. Eventually. I wonder if anyone has noticed it? I think you probably only notice it when you read all the chapters in one go. Which I, as the writer, didn't. That's why I made that mistake in the first place.)  
> (EDIT: Now I fixed it and it honestly wasn't as difficult as I thought. Figures. Now I don't have two contradicting statements anymore and I can move on to the next chapter with one worry less. Just wanted to inform you about my progress!)
> 
> Unless I overthrow all of my plans again, the next chapter will be a bit more... thrilling. Stay tuned!


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter, Takumi has a request, someone gets scared shitless, and Keisuke has murderous intent. Once again not necessarily in that order.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Half of this was written way past the time I usually like to be asleep on a Sunday evening. I hope it doesn't show. If you notice anything I have overlooked, feel free to tell me! Also feel free to leave a comment in general. You know, to fuel the author. ;)
> 
> Oh, and I changed the rating of this story, just to be safe.
> 
> I hope you'll enjoy!

It was, once again, a shitty morning for Keisuke. But this time it wasn’t the sunlight that brought him a rude awakening, no, it was his own damn brain that apparently decided a permanent restlessness was due after yesterday’s events. 

So now he was awake, and restless, and pretty pissed off, and worst of all: thinking. 

The evening had been long, and he didn’t have the capacity to process the continuous shocks of the threatening message, seeing his brother kiss Takumi, realising his own desire to kiss Takumi, and then talking with his brother about their shared desire to kiss Takumi.

What a day, really.

It was no wonder that his brain had decided to not waste more time than absolutely necessary on sleep. Was this how Ryosuke and Takumi felt when they got up at ass o’clock in the morning? Probably not. Keisuke was simply an evening person through and through. Takumi apparently not so much, judging by how fast he had fallen asleep in front of the TV yesterday. And Ryosuke… Well, sometimes Keisuke wondered if his aniki ever got any sleep, or if he just pretended to. That prick. He never looked as shitty and sleep-deprived as Keisuke felt right now.

He decided to stay where he was for now, even if he couldn’t fall back asleep. If his brain had decided that he needed to ponder all of his issues, well, then that’s what he would do.

Keisuke sighed loudly, the sound seeming foreign to his ears. Why couldn’t things be easy for a change?

He winced as he remembered the forlorn look on Ryosuke’s face when he had shown him that vulnerable side of his that he carefully concealed from the rest of the world. He was _scared_ , scared of what would happen because he didn’t know, and he had _told_ him about it. And Keisuke wanted nothing more but for him to stop having to be scared of a future that he couldn’t calculate as neatly as he did so many other things.

Keisuke would do basically anything for his brother. _Basically_ , because of course there were _exceptions_. Like, he wouldn’t commit murder for him or anything. That took it a bit too far. 

…Or would he? Ugh, honestly. How did his mind land itself in _that_ gutter?

He made a compromise with himself to not think about it unless the need arose.

Anyway, back to the core problem. The problem called “we both kinda fell in love with the same guy and neither of us knows what to do.” A shitty situation, really. Vague possibility that he could be willing to commit a murder for Ryosuke aside, he wasn’t sure if he would be fine with leaving Takumi to him. He still hated thinking like that, but he couldn’t help it. How was he supposed to handle being the third wheel if his brother and Takumi really got together? It would be hurtful, no doubt. Seriously, considering murder was a lot easier than imagining that.

“Jeez, the priorities you have…”, he chided himself under his breath. 

Joke aside, he wouldn’t have thought that a problem like this would ever threaten his relationship with his brother. But here he was, after yesterday suddenly painfully aware of all the signs of his affection that he had blatantly ignored in the past. Either he was really, really dense or a champion of denial. It definitely explained why he liked carrying Takumi around that much. 

Embarrassing. 

With a frustrated groan he got up and traipsed down the stairs for something to eat. Of course – it was just his luck – he happened to stumble upon Takumi preparing coffee in the kitchen. Or rather, trying to. He looked like he was struggling with the coffee machine, so Keisuke sighed and walked over to him to lend him a hand, ignoring the startled flinch from the other when his presence was finally noticed. 

“Morning,” he mumbled, “Here, let me help you.”

“Morning,” Takumi greeted back, still sounding a bit startled when he took a step to the side to let Keisuke access the coffee machine.

A short while later they were both sitting at the table with their coffees. Neither of them had said much of a word and Keisuke noted that Takumi looked tired as well. But then again, he always looked like he didn’t get enough sleep. Maybe he didn’t.

_'Idiots, both of them,'_ Keisuke thought and wondered if his brother was already on his way considering that it seemed rather early for that. But a glance at the clock confirmed that it wasn’t quite as early as Keisuke had thought it to be.

“Keisuke-san?”, Takumi’s voice suddenly broke through his musing.

“Ah, uh, yes?”, he mumbled bemusedly, torn from his thoughts.

“I have a question for you,” Takumi said, “Well, it’s more of a request.”

Keisuke’s full attention was on him now as he looked at him, slightly surprised at him speaking up so suddenly. “What is it?” 

Takumi suddenly looked a bit more uncertain, and Keisuke wondered why. 

“I wanted to ask you if maybe we could go back to Akagi this evening,” he said, looking down at his coffee. 

Akagi? A picture of a man holding up a phone with a brazen grin on his face suddenly came to Keisuke’s mind, but he chased it away. He regretted not telling his brother about the new message and the encounter when he had the chance to, but now it couldn’t be helped. 

“What for?”, he asked, but he had a pretty good idea already.

“I want to see you race on Akagi,” Takumi said and searched his eyes. “If it doesn’t bother you, I want to see the way you drive in a race. I already know what it looks like from the outside, but I want to see it up close. I think that might help me understand some more things.” He nervously rubbed the back of his neck. “You know. If it doesn’t bother you.”  
Keisuke looked at him, taken aback but not actually that surprised. “Of course it doesn’t bother me,” he said, which honestly wasn’t the whole truth. It would bother him with all but three people, and that were his brother, his mechanic Tomiguchi, and of course Takumi. He was the only of those three exceptions who had never actually sat next to him while he raced seriously. The request in itself didn’t surprise Keisuke. The fact that Takumi had actually asked for it did. 

“So… Is that a yes?”

“Sure,” Keisuke answered and grinned. “We’ll leave for Akagi right after dinner.” He knew that Ryosuke would probably not be very thrilled, but he wouldn’t say no. Not to a request like that.

_____

Just as Keisuke expected, his brother didn’t say no. He only cast a worried glance at Takumi, and then a stern one at Keisuke. “Don’t take too many risks,” he said.

“Understood.” Keisuke gave him a mock salute, which made Takumi laugh a little. The two brothers reflexively shared a quick glance.   
_'We're definitely in too deep,'_ Keisuke thought. He had to admit he was almost a bit disappointed when it turned out that Takumi’s feet had healed enough for him to put on shoes and walk to the car by himself. 

Keisuke honestly thought to be the largest part of their trip to Akagi to be very uneventful, even though of course he loved showing off his uphill techniques to Takumi, who was taking everything in silently with a big smile on his face. 

He would have really loved to say that this was the most interesting part of the evening. Surprisingly few racers were driving on Akagi tonight and the road was mostly free for him to drive to his full capabilities, which would have been enough to make this a satisfying experience.

But it was when he turned his car around at the summit when things started to go, well, _downhill._

A black car passed him while he made the turn, and he didn’t think much about it before he took a closer look at it disappearing into the night.

He knew that car.

Mt. Akagi, about year ago. And again at the same place, yesterday afternoon.

A taunting grin. Ugly little words staring at him from a phone screen. Takumi bloodied and bruised on the dirty concrete floor of an old factory building.

_'How dare they. How dare they show themselves here-'_

Gripped by a sudden surge of anger, he revved the engine and sped after the black car. 

It wasn’t long until it came back into his sight, only two corners away from the summit. He caught up quickly, dimly wondering if they had recognised him as well.

Probably. But it didn’t matter. 

His hands, which had been trembling with rage until now, suddenly stilled and closed around the wheel in an iron grip.

_Hate._

What he felt was clearly hate and not simply anger. 

He remembered the taunting messages, the audacity of this all, the fact that these people had dared to hurt someone he cared for, which only made it worse to him. They hurt and humiliated Takumi for the sake of their own wounded egos and Keisuke needed them to _pay_. 

His eyes focused on the rear lights of the car in front of him, his whole body tensing though he didn’t notice it in that moment. He forgot about anything outside his tunnel vision, only concentrating on his opponent and the way that his car reacted to his commands, rage engulfing him like a fever haze. 

He quickly caught up with the black car, its speed being no match for him. 

It would have been easy to overtake and disappear into the night, leaving no trace behind.

But he didn’t do that.

Instead of exploiting the opening on the left side that he could have effortlessly used to pass the black car, he chose to pull over to the right and got as close as possible without outright hitting bumpers. 

“Hey, what are you doing?!”, he heard Takumi inquire from the side, but he easily ignored it. 

He heard the blood rushing in his ears, usually a bad sign that warned him that he was probably angry enough to do something stupid, but this time he ignored it just as easily as the increasingly agitated questions from his passenger. 

This was just like what he had often watched Ryosuke do back when he was still actively racing. Moving closer, staying as if glued to the other car’s bumper, never changing the distance more than a few centimeters until the other driver lost their nerves. 

He was getting faster now, spurring on the car in front of him, pressuring its driver to go faster as well. Keisuke attacked the corners with fury, leaving no opening for the other to evade him or slow down. He was getting closer to the guardrail at every corner, keeping his eyes fixed on the black car’s rear lights. At this speed it only needed one small impact, one small contact with the guardrail to make an inexperienced driver swerve out of control. Keisuke stared the gap that still got narrower at every turn, spurred on by him calculatedly pushing the other to take steadily bigger risks to get away from the car chasing him. 

Just a little bit more…

_____

Takumi was shocked. Everything about this day up until this point had been pretty great if he dared to say so. He had been very happy about Keisuke readily granting his request, and amazed at his driving all the way up the mountain, being able to see why exactly he was such an amazing driver. Keisuke had been in a good mood, concentrated, but not tense. All up until they had turned around for the downhill.

Now Keisuke was right on that one other car’s bumper, chasing them, no, _hunting_ them.

It was different than anything else he had ever seen or sensed from Keisuke.

On one side of the road was the cliffside. On the other side the ground plummeted into a steep ravine. Takumi knew Keisuke was a talented driver, and he knew that he liked to take risks, but he knew where his limits were. His driving style might be risky and impulsive, but never reckless.

This was a different Keisuke. 

Takumi’s eyes jumped between the car in front of them and Keisuke, who was staring straight ahead and looked like he was completely out of it. There was something wild in his gaze and he was tense like a compressed metal spring about to unleash some sort of destructive energy. Takumi had never seen him this utterly _furious_ before. What the hell was going on?! Who was driving that other car? 

Speaking of the other car, Takumi could see how their driving got more frantic with every corner and how dangerously close to the guardrail he was getting. That was not a very experienced driver, judging from the clearly visible swerves in their driving. There was no need for Keisuke to get this intense; no, not only was there no need to, it was _dangerous._

Suddenly panicked, Takumi whipped his head around to shout at him to explain what was going on, to _stop this._

_“What are you doing?!”_

No answer. Instead, Takumi watched in horror as the car in front of them _almost_ scraped the guardrail while drifting through a narrow corner at a speed that was decidedly too high for even a decent driver, let alone a mediocre one. Keisuke was more than just a decent driver. He should know that-

-Was he trying to _kill_ them?! 

**_“Keisuke!”_ **

The calling of his first name finally got a reaction. Keisuke’s eyes abruptly went wide, and he looked like he was about to pull his hands off the steering wheel and only left them there by pure instinct.

“Shit-“ 

He braked abruptly, causing Takumi to jerk forward in the seatbelt and curse as well. Meanwhile Keisuke had pulled the FD over to the left side of the road and finally overtook the black car that was getting slower as well. As Keisuke left it behind, seemingly hellbent on finally reaching the foot of the mountain, Takumi looked into the mirror and saw that the black car had stopped completely and now just stood in the center of the road with its lights on, looking like nothing had happened until the lights disappeared behind the cliffside after the next turn in the road.

Takumi looked back at Keisuke who still looked tense and was still white-knuckled clutching the wheel, paler than usual. 

“What _was_ that?”, Takumi asked him and studied his expression when no immediate answer followed. Keisuke seemed to be struggling with himself as he took them both down the mountain at a bit faster pace than what was probably usual for him. Takumi felt himself growing angry, trying and failing to think of an explanation for Keisuke’s behaviour in that impromptu race. He had felt the rage radiating off his teammate, how couldn’t he with the way that he was driving? He wondered if he had acted similarly back when he had raced Shingo Shouji, or during his first race with Sudo Kyoichi. He couldn’t remember either of those times very well, though. Maybe Keisuke also had difficulties remembering what exactly had happened just now?

As Takumi continued to stare at Keisuke, he noticed how distraught he was looking and immediately felt a little less angry. 

Still. He wanted to know the reasons. Maybe it was something really private, something that Keisuke didn’t want to talk about. But he had endangered all of them by acting that way, and Takumi thought he deserved answers at least. “What was going on there?”, he repeated his question, trying not to sound too accusatory. 

Keisuke exhaled harshly before pulling into a parking lot at the side of the road that was mostly empty now that the night was almost over. He stopped the car but left the engine running. Takumi’s heartbeat had calmed down a bit by now and his head felt a bit clearer, but he could hear that Keisuke was still breathing heavily. It was not like he expected anyone to calm down after something like that easily. But it kept him painfully aware that what just had happened wasn’t normal. There was a sort of fear that something had irrevocably changed just now, and Takumi anxiously awaited Keisuke’s explanation.

“I’m sorry,” Keisuke finally said, quieter than usual. “That was…”

_'That's not an answer.'_

“…completely out of line,” Takumi finished the sentence when Keisuke didn’t continue. That earned him a sigh and a “Yeah… I guess it was.”  
Keisuke ran his fingers through his hair, stopped in the motion and stared ahead hollowly, trying hard to calm his breathing. 

“What happened? Something has to be wrong!”

“Nothing, just-“

It was at this point that Takumi had enough. “NO! There has to be something! You could have killed them! Hell, you could have killed _us_ as well! _Tell me what’s going on here!_ ” He was getting really angry at Keisuke’s evasive answers and had started shouting without even really noticing it, but it served to finally get a real reaction out of the other. Keisuke’s head snapped around and he stared right back at him, the rage from before having returned.

“Do you even know who that was?!”, he hissed, like that explained everything and Takumi was stupid for not getting it.

“No, I don’t, and even if I did, it wouldn’t make a fucking difference!”

They were riling each other up, feeding off each other’s energy like they did every time they had a race; only now it didn’t turn into anything positive. 

“Oh, trust me, it does,” Keisuke growled. 

Takumi was fuming. Still no definite answer, and he was getting really sick of it. 

“Then tell me if it’s so important! Or is it something too important for me to know? Do you think I’m too stupid to understand? I’ll tell you something: I’m not, and I’m getting really tired at you still trying to avoid giving me an actual answer! If it’s something personal, sure, go ahead and tell me so! But don’t you think you at least owe to tell me _something_ after what happened just now?!” 

Keisuke looked like he was about to lunge at him, but Takumi didn’t care about that. He wanted him to stop treating him like a child who couldn’t understand! It was like back in the beginning when they had just met and started working together instead of against each other; Keisuke acting aloof like telling him things was below his level, and it still made him feel insecure, but first and foremost it made him feel angry. For a moment he thought that he would really just get another “you don’t get it” thrown at him. Keisuke raised his hand and Takumi really believed that he was going to punch him, angry as he was, but the movement that followed was the wrong one. Before Takumi could comprehend what was happening, there was a hand gripping his chin and tilting his head to the side. Keisuke was looking at the fading bruise on his jaw.

“Whoever was in that car,” he said coldly, “was one of those who did this.”

Takumi blinked, the shock catching up with him, before frowning and resolutely gripping Keisuke’s wrist and pushing his hand away. 

_'So it was supposed to be revenge? For my sake? Or for_ his _?'_

“I hate it,” Takumi said, “when people do that kind of thing.”

“ _What_ kind of thing are you talking about?”, Keisuke asked, shaking off Takumi’s grip on his wrist and retracting his hand. 

“When people just take my problems upon themselves and think they need to solve them-“

“We _talked_ about this already!”, Keisuke interrupted him harshly. “This didn’t happen because of you, it happened because of us. It’s our problem as much as yours-“

**“You weren’t the ones they beat up and called a lap dog!”** , Takumi shouted back at him, feeling the heat rising to his face. Keisuke recoiled at his words, stunned into silence for a second. “You-“

He shook his head, slowly. His voice was calmer when he spoke again. “I hope I don’t have to tell you that whatever they might have told you is complete bullshit.”

“You’re right. You don’t have to tell me that.”

“Look, it’s just that you have absolutely nothing to do with them. You don’t know them. Aniki and I know them. We’ve raced them. We beat them. That is all that’s behind it, apparently enough reason for them to target you. How am I supposed to _not_ feel responsible?” 

Takumi saw that he was trying to reason with him now and it pissed him off a bit, but he had to admit that he was making sense. Still…

“I’m going to be _okay_ ,” he stated with insistence. 

Keisuke sighed and rubbed his temples, a gesture that oddly reminded Takumi of his brother. “I know,” he said, “I know that and I’m sorry. I know what I did was disproportionate. I forgot myself.”

Takumi regarded him carefully. “I don’t know… Maybe I would have done the same.” Keisuke looked back at him, his expression both rueful and relieved, and after holding eye contact for a moment Takumi turned his face and looked out of the window at the road to their right. He couldn’t remember seeing the black car pass them, and he was sure at least one of them would have noticed even though they had been busy arguing. 

“Well, it looks like you scared them quite a bit at least.”

Keisuke chuckled quietly. “I can’t say I’m feeling sorry for _that_.” Then his face turned serious again. “Maybe they’ll stay away from Akagi for a while. But I get it,” he added quickly, “No more keeping you out of things.”

Takumi smiled. “I would like that, yes.” In the pale light of the street lamp outside, Keisuke’s lopsided smile in return seemed even more prominent. Takumi unconsciously leaned closer to where he sat, trying to catch the details of Keisuke’s expression in the dim light. There was a hint of surprise that turned into unconcealed shock as Takumi followed a sudden crazy impulse and closed the distance between them, pressing his lips against Keisuke’s.

The world seemed to stand still for a moment as both of them remained almost motionless, until Takumi’s mind caught up with what his body was doing, and he flinched back in a sudden moment of panic.

Keisuke stared at him, wide-eyed and flustered, and Takumi felt the heat rise to his own face as well.

_'Oh, hell.'_

He continued to stare at his teammate dumbly for a few more silent moments as neither he nor Keisuke seemed to be able to get any words out.

Takumi swallowed down the panic that clogged his throat. “Shit. I’m sorry.”

Keisuke regained his ability to form words as well. “It’s- it’s okay,” he said, somewhat breathlessly. “ _I'm_ sorry.”

“Uh…”

Both of them averted their eyes, staring ahead through the windshield at the nightly parking lot. Takumi was thankful for the dim light because he suspected that his face looked like an overripe tomato, judging by how hot it felt.

He heard Keisuke next to him exhale a quiet breath. Neither of them said something, until Keisuke cleared his throat once.

“Let’s- Let’s go home, shall we?”

“Right,” Takumi replied quietly, unable to fully interpret his own actions and Keisuke’s reaction to them. He didn’t even dare to look at him again.

_'Why did I feel the need to do that?!'_

Wasn’t it Ryosuke who he was in love with? Was this kiss just a reaction fuelled by the adrenaline that was still running through his veins after the race and the following argument? Was it really that simple?

Something told him it wasn’t that simple. And as Keisuke drove them home through the nightly streets, Takumi wondered if nothing could ever be simple for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Boy, that escalated quickly.
> 
> We're getting closer to the end! I certainly hope that things will go more smoothly from now on.
> 
> (I also hope that I won't have to write a race scene too soon again. I'm really... nnnot too good at that. ^^")


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, okay, there's significantly less action in this chapter. It's a bit of an interlude. There's lots of thinking to be done. But we're getting closer and closer to the conclusion! I'm really looking forward to it! 
> 
> I hope you like this chapter filled to the brim with pining idiots. We're getting there. I promise. We're getting there.

The house was quiet and peaceful when they arrived there. There was no light in Ryosuke’s room, which had to mean that he was already asleep for once. Which was fine with Keisuke, because if his brother saw him now, he would immediately notice that something had happened and start questioning him about it. Keisuke didn’t know what would be worse: Telling him about the fact that he almost chased someone down a cliff or telling him about _the kiss_. He didn’t even dare to look over at Takumi, who had remained silent for the entire time they needed to get here. When he parked the car and they both got out, however, he couldn’t help stealing a little glance. But Takumi refused to meet his eyes and instead stared forlornly at the trees around the estate like they held the answers to all questions in the universe. Just to be sure, Keisuke followed his line of sight, but there really was nothing to see; neither the answers to all questions in the universe nor a weird animal or an axe murderer. The latter would at least have provided a convenient distraction away from what both he and Takumi were pointedly avoiding to confront. 

They went inside then and got out of their shoes, still in silence. When they came to the stairs, Keisuke at least managed a quick “Good night.”  
For a tiny moment their eyes did meet then, before Takumi looked away again. “Good night,” he repeated quietly, looking for a moment like he wanted to say something else, maybe apologise again, but he didn’t. 

Keisuke simply nodded and went up the stairs to his room, only stopping for a moment to listen at Ryosuke’s door if he really was already asleep. It seemed so.

With a sigh, Keisuke entered his room and closed the door. He didn’t want to talk to his brother right now, but on the other hand he didn’t really want to be alone with his thoughts either.

Because… He had _kissed_ him. That was such a shocking thought that Keisuke had to think it a second time. _Takumi had kissed him._

If Keisuke was honest, he had to say that he just didn’t know what to think anymore. Maybe he should be happy. Wasn’t that a very good hint that Takumi actually liked him back the same way that he liked him? Yes, he did feel a pleasant little spark of happiness somewhere in his mind, but it was dulled by the conflicting thought that maybe the kiss had just been some impulsive reaction to the fight they had. And then there was also the question what he was going to say to his brother. 

Would Ryosuke tell him if he had been in that situation? Maybe not. Probably not.

So should Keisuke even tell him about the kiss?

There was still a chance that Takumi hadn’t even meant it that way and Keisuke was simply overreacting. But hell, it hadn’t felt like a kiss that wasn’t honest. It had been very sudden, very awkward, and very… Takumi. 

Keisuke tried very hard to repress the memory of Takumi’s soft lips on his own, but to no avail. He couldn’t stop himself from imagining what might have happened if his reaction hadn’t been to freeze and do nothing, but to deepen the kiss instead. Where could it have gone from there?

Keisuke imagined pulling Takumi closer, letting his hands wander across his soft skin, fingers tangling in his hair…

_Shit._

Shit, shit, shit. He wasn’t supposed to think about stuff like that. Not when there was a very big possibility that he would have to be content with staying Takumi’s friend whatever else may happen. And besides, there was Ryosuke to consider as well. Hell, Keisuke was almost certain that Takumi had a thing for him and that if anyone had chances, it was Ryosuke. But Takumi had kissed him. Him, Keisuke. 

This was just too much. Keisuke let himself fall back onto his bed with an exasperated groan. How was he supposed to deal with this?! If it were only him, he could probably handle it – he did have some practise in stubbornly ignoring his attractions. But with his brother thrown into the mix, and with Takumi acting the way that he did…

Damn, he just couldn’t do this.

And as much as Keisuke might have enjoyed that kiss, being happy about it just felt like betrayal. 

Once again for good measure: _Shit._

Was there really no way to solve this situation without having it end in one big disastrous mess? Ryosuke would simply choose to miserably pine away if Keisuke let him, that much he knew. But he also knew that he couldn’t do the same, so there needed to be a way to solve this. If only he knew what was going on in Takumi’s head…

Well, at least he knew now that Takumi was most definitely not entirely straight. And that was at least a little bit helpful.

_____

Meanwhile Takumi was, unsurprisingly, asking himself some very similar questions.

Staring at the ceiling of the dark guest room, he was preparing himself for a sleepless night. He felt horrible. He felt like a moron. He felt like he was going to die of embarrassment. Why did he have to be so stupid?

It wasn’t just the fact that he had followed some crazy and stupid impulse that made him _kiss_ Keisuke, no, it was also the fact that it dawned on him what that impulse actually _meant_. 

He had thought that it couldn’t get any worse after he realised that he was in love with Takahashi Ryosuke of all people. But what did he know? It could get worse! And it wasn’t even just the fact that he felt like an embarrassing fanboy and a total nuisance, even though that was a big part of it. 

It was just that- hell, he didn’t even know how to explain it to himself, and he didn’t even know that something like this was even possible, much less that it would ever happen to him. How could he have fallen for Keisuke as well? Why did he let that happen? 

Thinking about it now, being in love with Keisuke seemed just as inevitable as being in love with his older brother, but it was- it should be- 

It should be impossible. It definitely shouldn’t feel this natural. But here he was, and he had for some reason decided to kiss Keisuke, and underneath the shock and horror he had even enjoyed it a little bit. But then he remembered the expression of pure shock on Keisuke’s face and something inside him twisted painfully, maybe with the knowledge that tomorrow there would be hell to pay. Maybe Keisuke first had to process the events before throwing him out, or worse, he was going to tell Ryosuke about it.

Or maybe he was just as embarrassed as Takumi and they would just awkwardly stay silent about it for the rest of their lives. Either way, he had definitely just ruined their friendship. And that after Keisuke had assured him that they were friends, which Takumi had already been happy about… But it seemed like he was getting greedy. It seemed like he wanted something different from both of these amazing people who he probably wasn’t supposed to get close to in the first place.

He really just felt like some sort of insolent fanboy right now. What was he even thinking?

But there was nothing he could change about it anymore. He had somehow managed to fall in love with both of them, and he knew that these feelings were true, or he wouldn’t be in this mess right now. If it were just some fanboy crush, he could deal with it. Really. 

It wasn’t, though. Not if it made him do stupid things like-

Well, he had definitely ruined something with that kiss. Seriously, what had he been thinking? 

_'Asking myself if Keisuke-san’s lips were really as soft as they looked in that moment, that’s what I’ve been thinking.'_

God, he was such an idiot.

But he had really fallen in love with Keisuke as well. Thinking about it, it didn’t feel the exact same way with both of the brothers. They were different from each other, and so were Takumi’s feelings for them. It was hard to think about and he couldn’t explain it if asked about it, but he knew that they were both important to him in their own way and the only thing he wanted was to get closer to them somehow.

He thought about how he could never let them discover this. They would laugh at him, or be disgusted, and he didn’t even know what was worse. 

_'But it’s a bit too late for that, isn’t it?'_ , Takumi thought bitterly. Some part of him wanted to run away, never look back, and ignore everything that had happened. But he wasn’t a coward. And Keisuke hadn’t been angry at him, had he? There had been shock on his face, but he had said it was okay and he didn’t flip out at him, right? Maybe it would be okay. Maybe they could both just forget about it. 

God, how he hoped that Ryosuke never found out. How was he supposed to explain this? 

Maybe the most sensible thing would be to tell both of them the truth. Maybe. 

But even if Takumi said he wasn’t a coward: That was something he couldn’t bring himself to do. He had never been someone to worry about the future too much. Ever since that fateful evening on Mt. Akina, however; ever since he had raced against the white FC and its amazing driver, he found himself thinking about his future. And having this future taken from him just because he couldn’t get his foolish attractions under control-

That was something he was suddenly scared of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I always underestimate how difficult it is for me to set up a nice conclusion. Bringing everything into the right order... Remembering that my readers don't know what I know about the backgrounds and my headcanons and remembering to include them somewhere (classic mistake of mine!)
> 
> I guess if you have any suggestions or wishes, now would be the time to mention them! Until then, see you next chapter and thank you for reading! ^^


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Featuring the clarification that it's very stupid to assume that Ryosuke isn't going to suspect anything, lots of silence, some eye contact and even more avoided eye contact, and Keisuke's favourite phrase ('Damn you, Fujiwara!')

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New Sunday, new chapter! I don't have much to say for once except the usual. I hope you enjoy and please don't hesitate to leave your opinion! Or literally anything else! This fandom is so small, please talk to me :')

Ryosuke felt like there was a certain restlessness in the house today.

Even Keisuke had been awake early today (and looked especially moody because of it.) Ryosuke wondered when the other two had returned and gone to sleep last night. His initial plan had been to wait for them, but for once he hadn’t been able to find anything to keep himself busy until then and even the mild worry he felt couldn’t chase his tiredness away after this exhausting week. 

His eyes inevitably wandered over to where Takumi sat, eating his breakfast slowly and in silence. Ryosuke looked him up and down, taking notice of the way the bruising on his face had faded already, leaving behind only a faint reminder of what had happened a week ago.

All things considered, he had recovered well. Beyond everything else, that had been the main motive behind having him here as a guest, and Ryosuke knew that he would want to and needed to return to his own home soon. The thought was more difficult than it ought to be. Maybe it had been a bad idea after all, and maybe Ryosuke really was lying to himself when he said that keeping an eye on Takumi’s recovery was his main motive, because he couldn’t help but feel a sense of gratification at knowing Takumi inhibiting their guest room. He knew that he would be very reluctant to let him leave and Keisuke would feel the same, especially because his brother was the one between the two of them who nowadays spent the most time in this house. 

Ryosuke looked over to where he sat, quiet and grumpy due to lack of sleep. Every now and then his eyes flickered over to Takumi, remained there for a moment and then looked away again, either at the wall or at his breakfast, but never at Ryosuke even while he was watching. It was almost as if Keisuke was trying to avoid looking at him, and Ryosuke suddenly asked himself if his brother’s strange behaviour was really only due to tiredness. 

Takumi was acting differently as well, not looking at either of them this morning and only giving short, mumbled answers whenever he was directly addressed. Ryosuke had at first written it off as usual for him, but now that he was more closely inspecting the way they were acting, it became clear that something must have happened. Ryosuke narrowed his eyes. Something must be going on that only they knew about judging by the way neither of them would look him in the eye.

Now that he had a suspicion, it was really hard to miss the way Keisuke chewed on his bottom lip like he always did when he felt guilty about something. 

There was a strange feeling of dread at the realisation and Ryosuke couldn’t get rid of it. There naturally was one thing that first sprang to his mind when he looked at the both of them, and it gave him the most plausible explanation for their behaviour. Now he found himself having to look away as well, and he closed his eyes for a brief moment before getting a grip on himself and opening them again. 

He needed to stop being selfish. 

Even though the feeling of dread only seemed to solidify, his mind wandered back to the question what he would do if Takumi really had feelings for Keisuke like it seemed… Maybe he had just deluded himself into thinking that Takumi couldn’t possibly love either of them back to protect himself. 

But if it was the case, he would have to let him go. If he didn’t, and Takumi got caught up between the fronts- 

Well, he had seen what that could lead to.

_'What a wonderful thing to think about at the breakfast table,'_ he thought wryly and directed his attention back to the bowl in front of him. His already meagre appetite had left him and he placed his chopsticks down, the small clink of porcelain alerting the other two to his action. 

“So, do you have anything planned for today?”, Ryosuke asked carefully, conversationally. He searched for a reaction on their faces, but there was no wince or meaningful glance at his question. They still averted their eyes like two children caught stealing from a jar of candies. 

“Nah,” Keisuke said, “Nothing. I hoped you would have something.” His voice sounded almost normal, but he put a bit too much of an effort into sounding nonchalant. “I thought about a trip to the city, but not in this weather.” He nodded in the direction of the window, where Ryosuke could see the pouring rain and the trees bending in the harsh wind. Ah, yes. He remembered seeing the weather report yesterday and it mentioning a storm for today. It looked like they would be confined to the house. He guessed that he could work on some assignments and keep himself busy if Takumi and Keisuke wanted to be left alone. 

He was getting ahead of himself again.

“Not in this weather,” he affirmed absentmindedly, then shook his head. “I didn’t have anything in mind.” 

“I’m fine with staying here,” Takumi suddenly piped up seemingly out of nothing and blushed when he noticed both brothers staring at him. “Uh, I’m going to take a shower,” he said quickly and got up to put his empty bowl away before almost scrambling for the door.

_'What was that supposed to be?'_

Ryosuke stared silently at where he had disappeared. Then his head shot around to his brother, who looked slightly pink in the face, and he gave him an accusing glare. 

_'What happened between you?!'_ , he thought almost frantically. He didn’t dare to actually ask the question, however.

Damn, he had known from the beginning that this wouldn’t work out, but then why did he have such a problem letting it go? 

Because he felt like Takumi was the only one he could ever choose. Because his feelings- his love for him ran deeper than everything he had ever experienced before. Because he didn’t know if he was capable of feeling this intensity of emotion ever again.

_'Because I can't allow myself to be jealous,'_ he thought.

_____

Keisuke had to resist the urge to bury his face in his hands. _‘Nope, nope, stay calm,_ stay calm _…'_

This was ridiculous. Takumi was clearly still embarrassed by what he- or they- had done, and watching him practically flee from the kitchen didn’t help Keisuke’s attempts to remain carefully distant from the events. 

And now that the memory returned full force once again, he definitely wasn’t fantasizing about kissing Takumi again, preferably in the shower and ideally while both of them were naked-

Shit. _Calm._

_'Damn you, Fujiwara.'_

The feeling of Ryosuke’s stare on him broke him from his fight against his overactive imagination. Now it was really time to get himself back under control if he didn’t want his brother to see through him immediately. To avoid having to look at Ryosuke, Keisuke got up to put his bowl away as well.

“Well? How was yesterday?”, he heard Ryosuke suddenly ask while he still had his back turned.

It was a harmless question, but Keisuke immediately felt his calmness crumble. Damn, of course one night to think it over still wasn’t enough to craft enough of a distance so he could talk to his brother without feeling like he was going to break down and tell him anything. 

“Good,” he said at length and tried to find something to keep himself busy so he wasn’t forced to turn around and face Ryosuke. But the more he tried to act normally, the more suspicious he looked. It was always like that.

Ryosuke raised one eyebrow. “Good,” he repeated.

Keisuke almost wanted to shout at him, _'I completely lost it and then Takumi kissed me and then I kinda lost it again, but only internally!'_ But he was well aware of how stupid that would be, so he only shrugged, “Yeah. Not many people were there.” That, at least, was the truth. It didn’t come as much of a surprise, though, when Ryosuke didn’t seem satisfied with the answer. Keisuke wondered how often he had already asked himself whether he was so transparent or if Ryosuke was so good at reading him because he was Ryosuke. 

“You didn’t happen to meet someone you know, did you?”

Keisuke wanted to glare at him because he seemed to know exactly which questions to ask, and he had been in this situation often enough to know that he couldn’t win this, at least not in the long run. “Maybe,” he answered, which was a horribly stupid answer that he immediately would have liked to punch himself for. This had to be a new record for how fast he admitted that he had fucked up. He blamed it on the fact that he was really not in the calmest mindset right now. 

“Nothing bad happened,” he added quickly, because it was sort-of-truthful as well. Okay, him losing his calm could be counted as ‘bad’, but no-one got hurt (that’s what he presumed, at least) and Takumi kissing him was definitely not something bad. Though maybe Ryosuke would think differently about that last one. 

Keisuke forced himself to turn around and returned his brother’s reproachful stare. He was surprised when one corner of his mouth suddenly quirked up in a smile. 

“Those people you might or might not have encountered hopefully didn’t give you any trouble.”

Sensing that his brother wasn’t mad at him, Keisuke smirked back at him. “I might or might not have given them more trouble than they were able to give me.”

Ryosuke chuckled before returning to a more serious expression. “And how did your passenger react?”

Keisuke had to look away again. “He was pretty pissed at me. Can’t blame him, to be honest.”

“He was angry?”

“Yeah. Have you ever seen him when he’s pissed? If I hadn’t been so angry myself, I might have been a bit scared.”

Ryosuke shook his head. “I hope I never have to give him a reason to be angry at me.”

“Yeah, you shouldn’t,” Keisuke sighed. _'Leave the fucking everything up to me.'_

He leaned back against the counter and crossed his arms behind his head. “Well, at least I’m pretty sure we’ll never see those guys on Akagi again,” he added dryly.

Ryosuke scoffed at that. “We’ll never see them again in all of Kanto. I’ve taken care of that.”

Keisuke openly gawked at his brother. “You… What!?” 

“Soon enough nobody around here will tolerate them on their roads.” A small, wry smile played around his mouth. “They’ve done something disgusting. The news about that have spread already.” Ryosuke searched his brother’s eyes before speaking on, “You know, they probably still don’t realize how much they miscalculated. They underestimated Takumi and the effect he has on everyone who ever raced him. It’s puzzling to me, really…” He trailed off and averted his eyes again, looking through the window at the storm that was brewing outside. Keisuke still hadn’t fully regained his composure. 

_'So_ that _was his mysterious plan of retribution. I don't know what I expected, honestly. Of course he wouldn't be satisfied with just intimidating them a little…'_

“Takumi won’t be happy about that,” he mumbled because that was what his mind got hung up on. Ryosuke frowned at him. “About what exactly?”

“About the fact that a lot of people already know what happened. He won’t like that a bit.”

_'He also won't like the fact that Ryosuke avenged him behind his back, judging by the way he got angry at me. But I'm on aniki's side for that. I still think those guys didn't deserve to get away unscathed.'_

“It can’t be helped,” Ryosuke said as if answering to Keisuke’s thoughts as well. “I didn’t even do anything. Word got out anyway. Rumours spread fast among racers.”

“I know.” 

He knew also that Ryosuke wouldn’t tell Takumi anything about what he did. Neither would Keisuke, despite the promise he had given. Takumi probably wouldn’t need that and find out by himself anyway.

Silence spread around them again. Faintly in the background were the howling of the wind outside and the sound of water running. Keisuke thought about the kiss again.

He looked at his brother and asked himself once again if he should tell him. Normally the answer would be 'no' because that was only his thing.

But it wasn’t.

Ryosuke chose this moment to push his chair back and stand up. “If you need me, I’ll be in my room.” He was already on his way to the door when Keisuke held him back. 

“Uh, actually…” 

Ryosuke turned around, waiting for him to say what he wanted to say. Keisuke swallowed heavily; he really didn’t want to do this, but he felt like he needed to. 

“Takumi kissed me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaand Keisuke dropped the bomb. I wonder what will happen next... >:)
> 
> This chapter was a bit difficult to get through. Instead of writing on it I actually started writing my favourite scene for the next chapter. Well, at least I'll have a headstart next week! ^^"


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brotherly argument No. 3 (4? It's definitely not the first at least.) 
> 
> For once, it's Keisuke who does the reasoning and has the saving idea. Ryosuke is absolutely floored, because, well... It's _unusual._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! I was on a roll and finished this chapter faster than usual. I hope you'll like it! As usual, here's my request for suggestions, reactions or constructive criticism in the comments if you have the time. Good reading! ^^

It really shouldn’t have been that much of an impact, but the words and their meaning pierced through Ryosuke like a white-hot iron poker. 

_Takumi… and Keisuke… had kissed?_

He attempted to say something, but for some reason the words he could usually rely on failed him this time. He wanted so badly to know what exactly had happened and how it could happen. During that very uncomfortable breakfast, he had his suspicions already. Then Keisuke had told him what had happened on Akagi last night and for a moment he had been relieved that the issue was something else. 

Well, apparently it wasn’t.

He didn’t even know if it was betrayal what he felt, but he told himself it wasn’t, because he had no right to feel betrayed. If Keisuke had kissed-

No. His brother had explicitly said that _Takumi_ kissed _him._

Ryosuke didn’t want to imagine what his face must look like right now, because Keisuke stared at him and paled. 

“I thought you deserved to know about it,” he said weakly and Ryosuke once again found himself admiring his brother’s honesty. He didn’t know if he would have said anything in his situation. Keisuke, however, didn’t keep things from him. He trusted him with this knowledge. It made him slightly wistful to see how much his little brother had grown. It was such an admirable trait; being honest to your feelings.

Ryosuke took a deep breath that, to his frustration, hitched a little bit without him being able to stop it. Thinking about how this could very well happen was very different from having to accept that it did indeed happen.

He somehow wished that Keisuke hadn’t told him. 

“That’s-“   
He paused, not knowing what he was going to say. _'Good for you'? 'Congratulations'?_ Definitely not.

“-I didn’t expect that,” he said, finally. It wasn’t exactly the strongest thing he had ever said. He didn’t know if he was supposed to be happy for his brother. Could that even be expected from him, given the situation? 

Judging by the look on Keisuke’s face, he at least didn’t expect him to. 

“Neither did I,” Keisuke said. “I don’t know if it really meant anything, aniki,” he continued carefully, after a little pause. Ryosuke almost laughed. As if Fujiwara Takumi of all people would just kiss somebody with no meaning behind it. The young driver might still be partly a mystery to him, but he knew as much. Takumi wouldn’t dare to do such a thing. Keisuke knew that too. Why was his brother still trying to reassure him? There was no need to. He had won.

_'…What am I even thinking?'_

This hadn’t been supposed to be a competition in the first place, even though they both might have come close to making it one occasionally. He needed to snap out of it, get a hold of himself, and quickly. They had talked about it. Both of them had known that something like this could happen. Now it was him who had to deal with it, though Keisuke somehow looked like he wasn’t happy with the situation either. 

“You don’t have to say that for me, Keisuke. It is what it is.”

_'If you plan to push him away because of me, that’s idiotic and you shouldn’t do it.'_ But he didn’t say that. Maybe Keisuke was right. Takumi was probably unsure himself, but he wouldn’t do a thing like that if there wasn’t _something_ that sanctified it.

If the kiss had been more than an accident, more than a little experimentation, then Ryosuke couldn’t allow himself to stand between the two. He was once again uncomfortably reminded of the situation with Kaori and how well it could be compared to this; and whatever happened, he didn’t want to be involved in something like that ever again.

He could see that Keisuke was getting angry at him now by the way his body and expression tensed. “You’re making it sound like everything is already decided, even though it isn’t! Not at all! Why are you just giving up like that?!” He ran one hand through his hair, looking frustrated. “I can’t believe I have to tell you that right now!”

“What are you trying to tell me? That you’re giving him up? That we are supposed to compete for him? I don’t understand you anymore.” 

That made Keisuke angrier, of course it did. “No, I’m not! And I don’t understand _you_! Damn it, it was just a kiss! Not like he told me he loves me or anything. Only a kiss!” It was like many past arguments they had, Keisuke getting riled up and exploding at him like a firework. Loud, colourful, and over almost as soon as it began. 

But he also had this tendency to pull other people with him when he got angry. Ryosuke started to feel it in himself as well and combined with his uncharacteristic emotional turmoil it made him unable to stop the words bubbling out of his mouth.

“Why are you acting like this all of a sudden? You’re making it sound like you want me to get together with him. It doesn’t work like that. And what makes you suddenly want to give him up?” It was frustrating, Keisuke seemingly faltering and trying to hand Takumi off to him. As if it was that easy. As if he even wanted that. 

“I’m not! I still want him! I don’t want to give him up, ever! But I also don’t want you to have to watch that and be miserable! For fuck’s sake, I care about you too! Why are you not at least _trying?_ ”

_'Oh, how I want to try.'_ But one of them, at least, deserved to be happy. And it was Takumi’s choice. It had been his choice from the very beginning, and they couldn’t take that away. They should be thankful that after everything that had happened, he was still willing to be in their company. Ryosuke clenched his jaw, only acknowledging the tension building in his body with a very small part of his conscience. God, why hadn’t he been able to stop this before it could even begin?

“It’s the nature of this world that not everyone can get what they want, Keisuke. I have already accepted that. And I’m glad that at least you can be with someone you love.”

“Stop talking like that! I fucking hate hearing you say such things!” Keisuke had shouted that last part, and standing there with his fists balled Ryosuke could see actual tears gather in his eyes. 

Yes, maybe he had gone too far. But it was the truth; a sad truth that he hated having to bear, but the truth nonetheless. Ryosuke wanted to apologise for his upsetting words anyway, but Keisuke was faster than him.

“You don’t even know if he’s really not interested in you. If you want to listen to my opinion, I’ll tell you that there’s _something._ I’m saying that he likes you. I mean, everyone who has watched you two over the past months can tell that he admires you.”

“That’s not the same, and it’s not what I want.”

Keisuke rolled his eyes, back to his usual self. “C’mon, aniki. Even Kenta told me something about noticing how often Takumi blushes around you. If even Kenta notices…”

“That still doesn’t have to mean anything,” Ryosuke said resolutely.

“You know, aniki,” Keisuke began, narrowing his eyes, “sometimes I get the feeling that you _want_ to be miserable.”

“I’m not miserable!”

“You are.”

“I will be fine.”

“You’re in denial. Just accept that you have a chance.”

Ryosuke scoffed. Everything would be easier to handle for him if Keisuke would only stop making such a big deal about it. “Even if all of that is true and a sure hint like you say it is-“ -Keisuke nodded at that, staring at him with a frown- “-it still doesn’t ensure that Takumi would be willing to enter into a relationship with me. I assume you didn’t forget what I told you about my… preferences. Not everyone is satisfied with that.”

Keisuke groaned, looking like he was one inch away from losing his patience again. “Why is _that_ suddenly a problem?!”

Ryosuke shook his head slightly. “It was always part of the problem. Just not the biggest part because I never assumed I would even get that far with him.”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake…” Keisuke was visibly trying to remain calm now. Ryosuke thought that he might prefer it if his brother went back to shouting at him, because he wasn’t used to him being the one trying to reason. Apparently, absolutely everything was different today. “Look, I’ll tell you something: I don’t think your sexuality would throw him off. Not Fujiwara. But what definitely _will_ is you being a moping _douchebag_ with no spine.”

_'Where did that suddenly come from!?'_

A bit insulted against better knowledge, Ryosuke glared at his little brother. Keisuke glared right back. “I mean it. Seriously, it was always you who told me to build my own future and fight for what I want. If _this_ was the kind of person you have been all along, I doubt my past self would have given you the time of the day and listened.”

One could have heard a pin drop in the Takahashi household after those words were uttered. Keisuke’s expression was serious, like he really expected his brother to fight for something that both of them wanted and only one could have. Ryosuke needed a moment to catch himself; the words had impacted in a way that felt like a punch to his abdomen.

“Keisuke,” he said, watching his brother still hold his stare. “This is different. There is no need to fight when Takumi doesn’t have feelings for me. I can’t force him.”

“And I’m telling you he does, or that there’s a high chance at least. And don’t you even want to find out? Can you really stand behind your decision if you never know for sure?”

_'He has a point,'_ Ryosuke thought, stunned, but also both wistful and proud. _'I wonder when he has become this mature?'_

But for as much as Keisuke might have a point, it still didn’t solve the base problem. Ryosuke sighed.

“Even if he does: We can’t exactly share him.” The fact that they both wanted the same thing still stood between them. But apparently, his brother thought he had a solution for that as well.

Keisuke leaned forward a bit, a gleam in his eyes that looked like a challenge. “We can’t?”, he asked, voice low.

Ryosuke laughed breathily in disbelief at what his brother seemed to be trying to suggest. He couldn’t really be proposing what Ryosuke thought he was-   
His voice dropped to what was almost a whisper. “You’re mad.” It wasn’t something he had ever said to his brother like that, but right now it was the only thing he could think of to say. 

Another look told him that Keisuke had actually meant what he said. “It’s not that crazy. If we both like him… and he likes both of us… Then it’s the simplest solution, isn’t it? It’s almost the logical solution.”

_'For how long has he planned this?'_

“ _Almost._ I think you know that something like that would be far less simple than you make it sound. Who says that he likes both of us enough to try? Who says that he’d be willing to do that?”

“Well, we’d have to ask him, of course. But why shouldn’t we try? You need to take chances sometimes, aniki. If anyone can make it work, it will be us. And I prefer it to the alternative. I’d rather share him with you than have one of us be miserable.” 

There it was again, the honesty that Ryosuke admired about his brother so much. It almost hurt to know that he wanted to do this for him, for _them_ …

This way of thinking was just like Keisuke: Unconventional. Unorthodox. Utterly _absurd_ at times. 

Ryosuke shook his head. “But the question is: _Can_ we make it work?”

Keisuke stared back at him, that challenge still in his eyes. “Can _you?_ Because I’m willing to do it.”

'Incredible.'

Incredible in every sense of the word. It was outlandish, it was risky…

But it was a _solution._

“He’s worth trying it. I can see that you feel the same,” Keisuke continued like he didn’t know that Ryosuke was already hooked.   
The more he thought about it, the more he liked the idea. It was not a bad compromise. It could work – as long as Takumi agreed to it as well. And as long as they got their jealousy under control. 

“I do,” he simply said, and Keisuke grinned at him like he had won a race that he knew he would win from the very beginning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ohhhh, this is going to be so self-indulgent.
> 
> I had this strange experience where I got really worked up in their argument. I hope everything I wrote makes sense to the reader, because I might have been getting ahead of myself. I couldn't find anything illogical, but if there is, tell me so I can fix it ~~and pretend it never existed~~
> 
> This was once supposed to be the last chapter... Now I think there will be at least two more... Oh dear...
> 
> Unfortunately I probably won't be able to post next week because my weekend is packed. Anything else would be the result of either a miracle, ruined plans, or a really messed up sleeping schedule. (Please only wish the first one upon me.)


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which things get moving. Okay, they were moving before, but now actual moves are made, if you know what I mean.
> 
> It also gets corny.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was a fight. Mostly the fact that the new semester has started and I'm a lot more busy now. I'll try to keep to my schedule and power through, but you might want to expect more future delays of new chapters. I'm pretty exhausted, but I'm still glad that I can present you with a new chapter!

Takumi felt nauseous. It almost felt like physical pain, as if someone had reached into his body and was squeezing his intestines in a tight grip. 

_‘I’m so stupid.’_

He let himself sink down against the wall of the shower, as sitting was still more pleasant than standing. His legs didn’t really have any strength in them anymore either. 

Early this morning, he had managed to convince himself that all would be fine and his stupidity from last night would be forgotten soon and that he would be able to face the two brothers no problem. However, upon first laying eyes on Keisuke this morning he had known that he was becoming delusional as well. 

It was _not_ fine. 

He felt like a complete idiot for fleeing from the breakfast table like he did, but he couldn’t stand being around them anymore after Ryosuke started questioning and he heard the forced nonchalance in Keisuke’s voice. It was obvious that he couldn’t get last night out of his mind either. 

Takumi suddenly felt angry at him as well as at himself, because neither of them were very good at just leaving the entire fucked-up stupidity of last night behind. Both of them had done some very dumb things and the kiss was only the crowning offense. 

If only he hadn’t given in to that stupid impulse, if only Keisuke had pushed him away immediately so they both could have laughed it off, if only Keisuke hadn’t looked as if he had been into it at least a little-

_Damn it._

Takumi had a lot more things he would like to blame on Keisuke, but it wasn’t like it had been his teammate’s fault that Takumi felt drawn to him. Though insisting on carrying him around and getting really close all the time didn’t exactly help… 

What kind of game was he playing, anyway? 

The anger was very helpful with keeping the nausea at bay, so Takumi allowed himself to dwell on it a bit longer. He had never had any problems standing up for himself, but ever since that damned day a week ago that he was refusing to remember, he just seemed to have lost that ability. It felt disgusting to falter this easily, but he was just so confused. How could any of this have happened? It wasn’t Keisuke’s fault, and neither was it Ryosuke’s. Was it his own fault?

No, he hadn’t sunken low enough yet to truly believe that. But even the knowledge that he had no control over this didn’t help with anything right now. He might not be responsible for his feelings, but he was responsible for acting on them. He might have destroyed his still unsteady friendship with Keisuke, and if word got out to the older of the brothers, it wouldn’t do him any good either. 

He let his head sink until his forehead rested on his knees. Ryosuke had been nothing but supportive from the very beginning, and Takumi wasn’t sure if he even wanted that relationship to change in any way. Either way, he would have to decide. And ‘none of them’ might not be an option anymore after what he had done. 

Water splashed against the walls of the shower when Takumi frustratedly hit the floor with his fist. If only he hadn’t managed to get himself beaten up like a complete idiot, he might have never noticed anything and never become stuck in this fucked-up situation. He wondered what his friends would say if they found out that he had a crush on not one, but two men. Or worse, what his dad would say. _Oh, shit._

He faintly remembered being told “Don’t let them coddle you too much” back when he was in the hospital. Shitty old man. Had he suspected something…?

Either way, it was too late already. Takumi was in this mess, and now he needed to get out of this mess. There was no way around that. The only thing that could help was probably having a decent talk with Keisuke about what had happened. As long as this… _thing_ was looming between them, there was no chance of anything returning to normal.

Well, as if anything about his life hadn’t stopped being normal once Keisuke and his brother had appeared in it. 

Takumi paused and searched his mind for a while, but he couldn’t find any regret about pursuing a racing career and joining Project D anyway. It was good to know that at least in some aspect, he was still able of some form of reasonable thought. Good to know indeed. He wouldn’t let any of this ruin what he had been working so hard for. 

He stood up again, deciding that his little self-pity session ended here and now. He hated the thought of having to confront Keisuke, but they really needed to talk about this. About the fact that both of them had apologized but neither had actually tried to clear things up. About the fact that there was also Ryosuke whom Takumi definitely couldn’t ignore. And he definitely also needed to tell Keisuke that he needed to stop touching him and smiling like that all the time if he didn’t want Takumi to end up kissing him a second time.

Okay, maybe _that_ was a gutter he needed to stay away from for now.

He got out of the shower, towelled himself off, got dressed, and then went to search for Keisuke. He hoped that he could get an opportunity to talk to him alone before his resolve wore off.

_____

Ryosuke was still mulling over what Keisuke had said to him. He wasn’t really certain about anything anymore – his thoughts kept wandering from Takumi to his brother, and back to Takumi. It was confusing to think about, especially considering that it had never come to his mind at all. He wondered why that was the case.

He had been dwelling on his feelings for Takumi for so long, never permitting himself to pursue them-

Maybe Keisuke was right. Maybe he just wanted to be miserable. 

But he knew about the damn risks- Everything that could be ruined by one wrong word, one misplaced look-

The best, most logical solution would still be for both of them to step back and forget about any romantic feelings they might have had. Or rather, it _had_ been the most logical solution until Takumi kissed Keisuke. 

It was still difficult to believe. Maybe it was the shock of Takumi just being able to go ahead and do something that Ryosuke would never have dared to do in his place.

Well. As if that should surprise him anymore. Hadn’t it been like this ever since he met the young driver for the first time? Wasn’t that exactly why he had always felt so drawn to him? Takumi had this potential to do everything that Ryosuke could only ever dream of doing, and it was the most fascinating and most frustrating thing he had ever experienced.

Ryosuke felt that he was getting carried away again. Keisuke had left already, because for all his tendency to burst into his room at any odd time of the day, he also knew when his brother wanted to be left alone. 

Ryosuke chuckled to himself, once again in disbelief. Keisuke wasn’t someone who liked sharing attention, so the fact that it was him to suggest such an idea was more surprising than the suggestion itself. Ryosuke would have never thought that his brother would consider such a radical solution, which only served to show how serious this was to him.  
But none of that mattered compared to what Takumi would think. He didn’t give Ryosuke the impression of being a person who would agree to something like that, so he was still unsure. If only-

“Oh. Ryosuke-san.”

Ryosuke blinked, too caught up in his thoughts to have noticed Takumi stepping into the doorframe, his hair still damp from the shower.

_‘Speaking of the devil.’_

“Are you still hungry?”, Ryosuke asked, remembering the hasty way in which the other had fled the kitchen. After what Keisuke had told him, he could understand why. 

“No,” Takumi replied hesitantly, lingering for a moment, “I was searching for…” He trailed off with an awkward wave of his hand and looked away. Ryosuke felt a sudden pang at that.

“I think Keisuke went upstairs,” he said quietly.

Takumi looked at him, the slightest frown in his expression, before fully stepping into the kitchen. “Is everything okay with you?”

Ryosuke was taken aback, he must have allowed some of his hurt to show on his face if Takumi went ahead and asked him this. “Yes,” he answered and willed the light smile onto his face that usually deflected further questions. “Why do you think it is not?”

Takumi frowned again and blushed slightly, looking a bit defensive. 

_‘Bad move, Ryosuke. Bad move.’_

“I was just asking. You looked like you were thinking about something uncomfortable.” 

“And what would that be?”

Takumi’s eyes met his. He looked a bit pissed off, and Ryosuke couldn’t blame him. He was being unfair and letting his bitterness get to him.

“You tell me,” Takumi said. Ryosuke was, once again, taken aback by his boldness. He shouldn’t let this become a pattern. Although it was exciting to see Takumi growing more comfortable around him, it was dangerous because a moment of inattentiveness was enough to prompt a not well thought out answer from Ryosuke. 

“Do you ever… think about something that seems so close and so far away at the same time?” 

That didn’t come out difficultly at all, and Ryosuke cursed himself. _‘Please, for heaven’s sake, stop talking!’_

But now he found that he couldn’t quite stop himself, not with Takumi standing there and waiting for him to continue. There was no judgement reflected on his face. Not yet. 

“Something that you sometimes think you can obtain just by stretching out your hand. But you don’t. You never do, because you have no idea what will happen if you do.” 

He finally managed to stop himself from talking further until he revealed something he might regret. He had already said too much, and it was so corny and uncharacteristic for him that Takumi must have picked up on it. He should have kept his mouth shut and insisted that Takumi go search for Keisuke for whatever reason he had.

Now it was too late for that. Takumi looked startled by Ryosuke’s sudden decision to let his guard down for him. He wasn’t dumb, he must know that it was something serious and that it might have to do with him. 

“I have been thinking about something like that for a long time now,” Takumi said. “I do know how that feels, Ryosuke-san.” 

Ryosuke believed to see a familiar sort of longing in Takumi’s eyes, and was startled by it. It was like looking into a mirror, or like what he imagined his own expression to have looked like earlier. It made him sad for a moment. That emotion didn’t last long until his brain caught up with what that might mean.

Of course, he could be gravely mistaken… But maybe this was the chance that he hadn’t dared to wait for. And who knew, maybe there would never be another one. This moment was as right as any other, but Takumi’s expression gave him a tiny shimmer of hope that maybe he didn’t have to hold back anymore.

He didn’t like getting his hopes up. He tried avoiding it at all cost as nothing good ever came out of it, but it was really difficult not to in this case. _‘Take a chance,’_ he told himself, an echo of Keisuke’s words. There was so much he could lose, but…

“Takumi… Do you…?” He couldn’t bring himself to finish his question, but Takumi seemed to have understood the meaning just fine. “Please don’t make me answer that,” he said quietly, averting his eyes and looking like the very image of shame. He shouldn’t be ashamed, Ryosuke thought. 

“You already gave me enough of an answer,” he replied, watching closely for Takumi’s reaction. He could still be mistaken, after all. 

Takumi didn’t look up, and Ryosuke could see the way his body tensed. He looked like he wanted to run away, but he didn’t. Could it really be that both of them had wasted their time on the same concerns? 

Takumi finally looked back up at him and swallowed nervously. “I’m sorry…”

“Why do you always seem to apologise for things that you don’t need to apologise for?”, Ryosuke asked, keeping his voice quiet. “If we both feel the same way, then I think that it’s something neither of us should feel sorry about.”

He was met with a startled look after speaking. “I- what?!” Takumi almost stumbled over his words, and Ryosuke took a deep breath to steel himself.

_‘This is a risk worth taking.’_

He crossed the distance between them, made a step forward so they were only inches apart from each other, and raised a hand to Takumi’s face. Just like he had wanted to do for a long time already, he brushed Takumi’s cheek with his thumb. Takumi didn’t shove his hand away or take a step back like Ryosuke used to expect in this scenario. But Takumi always had a way of throwing his carefully planned and analysed scenarios into disarray… in the best way possible.

Their eyes met and Ryosuke held his stare as he continued his gentle gestures of affection. From the moment he had appeared in his life, Takumi had been a mystery he couldn’t figure out and Ryosuke knew that was what had drawn him to the young driver all this time. 

“Ryosuke-san,” Takumi said, still quietly and carefully, after a long silent moment had passed between them. “I’m listening,” Ryosuke replied and stilled the movement of his thumb, waiting for what Takumi had to tell him with bated breath.

Takumi closed his eyes for a brief moment as if he was in pain or finding whatever he wanted to speak about incredibly difficult to say. “I don’t know what to think anymore,” he said before opening his eyes again and averted them like before. “I don’t understand you, Ryosuke-san. I’m sorry if you feel disgusted, or revolted, and I want you to know that I can continue just like it was before. It’s okay. I don’t want this to interfere with racing, with the Project, with whatever you have planned for me. I don’t need you to pretend. Please, I don’t want you to.”

Ryosuke couldn’t help but stare in astonishment, before the words spoken fully caught up to him and both sadness and resolve added themselves into the mix. 

“I need you to understand that I don’t feel the necessity to pretend about this,” he replied in the very same tone of voice, still keeping his hand where it was to let Takumi know that no, this wasn’t just an attempt to appease him in order to keep the Project working. Ryosuke asked himself why Takumi would assume that, though he feared that he knew the answer. He was about to add something, maybe that he would never think about manipulating his feelings like that, but Takumi surprised him once again.

The look on the younger one’s face suddenly shifted into something determined, just like the expression he got before a difficult race. Ryosuke knew instinctively what he was going to do and responded to it without thinking, a reaction that surprised him as much as it delighted him.

Their lips met halfway as they both moved to kiss each other. 

For how often Ryosuke had fantasized about something like this happening, he was still surprised by it and the only thought that ran through his head as he and Takumi smashed their lips together was a steady stream of _‘yes!’_

More surprising was only the fact that neither of them was quick to retreat even though the kiss itself was a bit awkward. Takumi had closed his eyes and Ryosuke was about to do the same when he caught a movement in front of the door, caused by a very familiar figure.

To Keisuke’s credit, he didn’t try to interrupt their moment. He waited in the doorframe silently until Ryosuke and Takumi broke their kiss, but the reproachful glare he sent his brother’s way was probably supposed to tell him something along the lines of, _‘This is already the second time I walked in on you kissing Takumi; please stop that.’_

“Seriously?”, he asked slowly, and Takumi swivelled around with a look of horror on his face. 

“I think,” Keisuke said, “that there are some things the three of us should talk about.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh dear. What a setup. The next chapter will be hands-down the most difficult to write.


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things don't go as smoothly as nobody expected. At least everyone was somewhat prepared for this. 
> 
> Now what?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is actually going to be the second-to-last chapter. I decided that I will write an epilogue of sorts, so that's something to look forward to!
> 
> But for now, here's the chapter!

Standing in the doorway and looking at the scene before him, Keisuke felt mildly triumphant. He had only left the room for a few minutes, and what was happening as soon as he got back? Ha. He wasn’t even really pissed about seeing his brother and Takumi kiss, which proved another point and only served to make him feel even more smug. 

_Hah. Told you, aniki._

It felt so good to be one hundred percent correct. But he’d have to wait until later to rub it in his brother’s face. Judging by both of their expressions, there were definitely a few things to sort out first.

Takumi was beet red in the face. Even Ryosuke’s cheeks looked a little bit pink and it was almost like he had been caught doing something forbidden, which was pretty absurd. He caught his countenance rather quickly, while the same couldn’t be said about Takumi, who appeared to have frozen in embarrassment. 

If the situation were just a bit different, Keisuke would have laughed at both of them. But for Takumi’s sake, he attempted to keep a straight face. Which was not an easy feat. Seeing his brother embarrassed was hilarious every single time it happened, which wasn’t very often and therefore needed to be savoured. 

“Relax,” Keisuke said and couldn’t keep the amusement from his voice entirely. Takumi was still shell-shocked, but Ryosuke started glaring at him. “True,” he said in a sober tone of voice. The sound finally seemed to wake Takumi from his stupor. 

“I’m sorry-“, he said a bit too loudly, then interrupted himself, “What the hell?!” 

“Calm down, Takumi,” Ryosuke said and lay a hand on his shoulder. Takumi immediately flinched it off and shook his head. “Keisuke-san, why are you-“

“Oh, come on. We kissed, too. Isn’t this the perfect time to finally drop the -san?”

Takumi’s blush, which had receded a bit, now returned with a vengeance. What also returned was the angry glint in his eyes that Keisuke still remembered very well.  
Takumi made a step to the side and turned so that he could look at both brothers. He took a glance at Ryosuke before his eyes settled back on Keisuke.  
“Shut the hell up,” he hissed and for a moment looked like he wanted to punch him.

Keisuke discovered that there were now two furious glares aimed at him. Not that he was usually impressed by that, but the combined force of an angry Ryosuke and an angry Takumi did make him backtrack and rethink his words a bit.

_Whoops._

“Let’s try this again and start from the beginning,” Ryosuke said quietly with a bit of a threat behind it and shot his brother a look that made the latter decide that _'shutting the hell up'_ was probably the smartest option right now. Damn. It was not like he was always this bad at reading the mood, but Takumi seemed to be genuinely troubled by what was going down and obviously didn’t appreciate Keisuke’s attempts to lighten it up. 

“Try _what_ again?”, Takumi asked in a tone that still held an edge of anger. For a moment Keisuke thought that Ryosuke might pull him into a second kiss, but that would have probably escalated the situation even more. 

“Try to unravel the situation that we are presented with here. Let’s try to calm down first- _All_ of us-“ Ryosuke said that with a pointed look at his brother.

Takumi, however, had a different idea. “No,” he said hotly, clearly not happy about being told to calm down. “I want to know what’s going on. Now.” He fixed his glare on Keisuke again. “You gave me a promise.” 

Keisuke knew exactly which promise he meant, though to his defence he had to say that the actual secret they were keeping from him right now was not even a full hour old. Everything else was basically out in the open by now, as far as he could see it. 

“I think it should be pretty obvious what’s going on. You kissed each of us. We both liked it. We- What?!” He aimed that last word at his brother, who looked like he was about to go ahead and strangle him. Whether it was from embarrassment or a displeasure at his methods, Keisuke wasn’t sure. 

Ryosuke didn’t deign to give him an answer. But before he could actually start scolding him or whatever, they were both distracted by Takumi heavily sitting down on the couch and burying his face in his hands. Keisuke turned towards him, alarmed. He didn’t get the chance to ask if he was alright, however.

“I don’t want to talk about this,” sounded Takumi’s voice, muffled by his hands, before anyone else could speak up. The brothers exchanged a quick look before Ryosuke spoke up. “Please. You must understand that we _also_ want to know what exactly is happening here.” He walked over to the sofa and sat next to Takumi, who didn’t move at all. Keisuke frowned and stayed where he was. 

Takumi faltered even more. “It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have kissed either of you. I’m sorry.”

Keisuke cleared his throat, “Let’s not talk about what you should or shouldn’t have done-“

“Keisuke!”, his brother reprimanded sharply, trying to shut him up. 

_'No. Not this time. I promised Takumi not to keep him out of things anymore. And I also very much care about it if he says that he regrets kissing me, thank you very much.'_

“There’s one thing I want to know,” he said loudly for the other two to hear. Takumi didn’t react, but Keisuke simply continued. “I just want to know if it was real… what happened between us. And between you two. That’s what I want to know.” 

Takumi finally tore his hands away from his face. He hadn’t been crying, as Keisuke had half-expected, but he looked deeply distraught. “I said I don’t want to talk about it!”

“Takumi.” Ryosuke’s voice was calm, though Keisuke could see in his eyes that he hated talking about this as well. “Please.” 

Keisuke realised that both he and his brother were scared of the answer, though that had to be expected. They had already both concluded that they couldn’t give Takumi up. But Takumi, on the other hand… What did he think about this? Keisuke had been certain that there must be something, but what if he was wrong after all?

“What do you want, Takumi?”, he asked, dreading what he would hear next.

“I don’t know what I want!”, Takumi replied, a desperate tone to his voice. His shoulders were raised defensively, and he met Keisuke’s eyes. His expression was no less desperate than his voice. “I really don’t know! I’m sorry, okay?” He looked back at the floor. “I want to leave.”

“No, don’t leave,” Keisuke said quickly. “I – we – know how that feels. Look, I’m speaking for both of us when I say it’s okay. Right?” 

He looked over at Ryosuke, who had been uncharacteristically quiet. His brother was staring at Takumi like he wanted to get closer, but he didn’t dare to given the situation. “Yes,” he said softly. “We don’t judge you for it. But we’re glad that you’re being honest.”

Takumi didn’t look up and shook his head again. “I’m- I’m so sorry. But don’t make me choose. I can’t choose.” 

Keisuke looked at him sympathetically. “That’s okay.” He took a small breath to steel himself before continuing. _Now or never._ “If you can’t choose,” he said shakily, “then why don’t you decide for both?”

Takumi’s head snapped around and he stared at him as if he had suddenly grown a second head. “What do you mean?!” More quietly, almost in a whisper, he continued, “If you’re trying to mock me, that’s not funny.” 

Ryosuke helpfully decided to intervene again. “We are not trying to make fun of you, Takumi. This is a serious matter. It would neither be appropriate nor fair to take advantage of your honesty.” He paused. “If I haven’t made it clear enough earlier: I like you. I like you a lot, Takumi. I’m not lying when I say that I can’t imagine living without that truth anymore.”

Takumi looked at him in clear shock, as if the two of them hadn’t just shared a deep and passionate kiss. Keisuke hated to interrupt the moment, but he would like to keep the conversation from derailing. He had asked the important question already, and also he didn’t plan to be ignored over his brother’s heartfelt confession. He cleared his throat. Both Ryosuke and Takumi had been a bit lost in their own world and seemed startled when they looked at him. 

“I’m not trying to keep you from having your moment there, aniki, but I want to say that I feel very much the same way.” He finally walked over to the sofa and sat down on Takumi’s other side, because now he didn’t get the feeling anymore that the younger would feel trapped by that. “I mean, I haven’t been in love with you for as long as aniki, but I kinda ended up noticing at some point anyway. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you when I first had the chance. That evening was… eventful. You know.” He chuckled ruefully and believed to see the hint of a pained smile. 

“I remember,” Takumi said quietly. He shook his head and frowned. “You just told me… that you both…”

“Yeah.”

“So… What now?”

Ryosuke leaned back and sighed. “Keisuke had anticipated that this might happen. We already discussed this matter. Even before you affirmed the theory, we have come to the conclusion that we don’t want you to decide for one of us.”

Takumi remained dangerously quiet, so Keisuke spoke up, “We just agreed on the fact that we don’t want this to come between us.”

“But we don’t want to give you up, either,” Ryosuke added.

“So we have a proposal to make,” Keisuke said carefully. He hoped that after the explanation, the second time he asked the question would work better than the first. “We want to… both be in a relationship with you. Simultaneously. I mean, only if you agree.”

_____

What.

_What._

**_What?!_ **

Takumi was pretty sure his jaw dropped all the way down to his chest, even though in reality he actually kept it closed. The winds of the promised storm howled outside the window as Takumi tried to sort his thoughts.

Had he actually heard that right? They wanted him to date _both of them_? _At the same time_? 

Something in his brain must have short-circuited upon hearing both of their confessions. That was the only logical explanation. There was no way that Keisuke would suggest something like that.

To be certain, Takumi asked to hear it again. 

Keisuke actually looked a bit uncomfortable while repeating it, but Takumi heard the exact same thing as the first time around. It had the weird property of making sense and _not making sense at all_ at the same time. Worse than that, both brothers looked like they were being completely serious. 

Takumi stood up abruptly, which caused Keisuke to flinch almost unnoticeably. Honestly, what were they expecting to happen?

Takumi already felt like he was cheating when he kissed both of them. From the moment he noticed his feelings for Keisuke, he had felt like he was cheating somehow. He knew that he would have to make a decision sooner or later, and until now his decisions had been pretty terrible. Through his actions he had been getting both their hopes up, and he felt like he was just making this worse for them and for himself. 

And now…

It wasn’t supposed to be an option to refuse deciding for one of them! There had to be some joke to it, or they didn’t know what they were talking about. Except why _wouldn’t_ they know what they were talking about? 

On the other hand, why would they make a joke like that if everything else was true? Takumi felt increasingly like a complete idiot for not getting their intentions.

“What the hell are you expecting me to answer?”

Keisuke shifted in his seat. “Honestly? Our goal would be a Yes or a No,” he said while holding Takumi’s stare, “That’s what it comes down to.”

Takumi narrowed his eyes at him, trying to read his expression. “You’re trying to make fun of me,” he said, making it sound like a statement even though he wasn’t certain at all. 

“No,” Ryosuke chimed in. He had his hands folded in his lap. One of his fingers was softly tapping the back of his left hand, as if he was nervous or annoyed. “It’s an honest offer. A solution for the problem we’re facing.”

“So what you’re saying is that you really want to _share_ me or something?!” Takumi still hadn’t managed to get the chaos in his mind back into order, but this was the thought that kept sticking. 

Keisuke frowned slightly. “You’re making this sound wrong. We only both like you, and we both want to be in a relationship with you. I get that it might sound weird to you, but don’t you think that it could be a solution? You like both of us too, don’t you?”

“Yeah- But it’s- That’s-“

“It would be just like a normal relationship!”, Keisuke pressed on, unimpressed by Takumi’s reaction. “Only with two people. Who both know about the situation and are both okay with it. Come on, Takumi. We’re all adults. And we’ve thought about it. Of course neither of us immediately jumped to the occasion. But we’re willing to try it.” He leaned back. “Yes or No?”

“It’s you who’s making this sound wrong!”, Takumi shouted. “I can’t agree to that! How is this ever going to work with both of you? I can’t do this!”

Keisuke stood up as well, annoyingly taking advantage of the fact that he was several centimeters taller than Takumi. “If you really like both of us, you can!”

“That’s not the question here! How can you expect me to agree to something like that?! I do- have feelings- for both of you, but that doesn’t mean you can come in here and assume I’ll be okay with- whatever that’s supposed to be! You trying to pressure me into this even after I said that I can’t do it! It’s not a 'Yes or No' that you want, it’s just a 'Yes'! I gave you my answer!” 

“You said that because you’re not sure if it’s going to work-“

“Damn right I don’t know how it’s going to work, Keisuke-san! Stop assuming that I will just decide on a whim to try something like _that_!” Takumi had to pause and take a deep breath; he felt dizzy from shouting at Keisuke. This was why he hated becoming angry. It always ended with him doing something stupid, and while he was furious, he really didn’t want to pick a fight with Keisuke in the Takahashi’s kitchen. “This is serious to me,” he said shakily. “Don’t downplay this. I’m confused. I hate this. I would like to say that I can just ignore the fact that I have feelings for both of you, but I can’t. Stop treating this like it’s easy.”

Keisuke took a step closer, looking just as sobered as Takumi felt. He dared to lay a hand on his shoulder, and this time Takumi didn’t shake it off. “I’m not saying it’s easy. It wasn’t easy for me to accept that this is the situation we’re dealing with, either.” His tone of voice was calmer than before, but there was a slight tremble to it that told Takumi that he hadn’t really calmed down. 

Takumi saw from the corner of his eye that Ryosuke was getting up, too. There was a certain tenseness to his posture as he walked over to them, Takumi noted. He wondered at what point he had learned to read Ryosuke’s body language this well. “Both of you, calm down for a minute. Keisuke, I know that you want this to work. So do I. But we need to discuss this like rational people if we want the result to function.”

Keisuke scoffed. “There is not much ‘rational’ about this, aniki. Heck, you should know that. You’re making it sound like this is some sort of business deal that we need to negotiate.”

Takumi covered Keisuke’s hand, which still rested on his shoulder, with his own. Ryosuke’s intervention had served to see this all a bit more matter-of-factly. He was beginning to get his thoughts back into order. “I’m sorry, but I agree with Ryosuke-san. This is not something I want to decide about on a whim.” Keisuke looked as if he wanted to interrupt, but his brother shushed him. Takumi continued, “I will need to think about it. What you’re asking of me is- it’s- Well, it’s nothing I would have ever thought about. I can’t pretend to understand it right now.”

Ryosuke looked mildly relieved. “That’s fully understandable, Takumi. I’m already thankful that you’re willing to consider it. That is very important to me.” He looked over at Keisuke, who had remained quiet while both of them had spoken.

To both of their surprises, Keisuke took a deep breath and apologised. “I’m sorry for trying to pressure you to make a decision. Take as much time to think about it as you need.” He searched Takumi’s eyes, suddenly looking very serious. “Until you make that decision, I will not leave or move on. So make sure to think about it well.”

Takumi swallowed. There was no doubt left in his mind that both of them really meant this. This wasn’t some sort of elaborate joke. This was honest, and that knowledge suddenly felt very heavy.

“I will.”

It still was confusing, all of this was, and it was decidedly too much for him to handle right now, but he was confident that he could sort this out with himself given enough time.  
But he also knew that he couldn’t do it here, while the brothers were around him all the time.

“I will take time to think about it,” he repeated, “but I think I need to go home. I feel like I’ve overstayed my welcome already, and I think I need some distance.” 

Keisuke looked crestfallen for the fraction of a second, but Ryosuke nodded solemnly. “If you want to leave today, you’ll need to hurry,” he said quietly. “The storm is getting stronger. Soon it will be too dangerous to go outside. If you pack your things now, I’ll drive you back to Shibukawa.” 

Takumi looked out of the window, at the storm that had picked up force while he had been in the shower. “Okay,” he replied, just as quietly. For some reason, he couldn’t bring himself to look Keisuke in the eye after seeing that kind of expression on him.

It was better if he left fast, anyway. 

“I’ll pack my stuff,” he said and left the kitchen, not daring to look back.

* * *

Seven days. It had been seven whole days since Takumi left to have time to think, and Ryosuke hadn’t heard one word from him. He hated to admit it, but it made him antsy. Every time his phone rung, he was looking at the number hopefully only to see that it was Fumihiro calling. In his disappointment he might have snapped at his friend once or twice, which he had immediately reprimanded himself for. Fumihiro wasn’t dumb and knew that something was going on, but he had the tactfulness not to ask. 

The only one whose mood was worse than Ryosuke’s was, naturally, Keisuke. Ryosuke had caught him several times standing somewhere in the house and staring into thin air, having halted what he had been trying to do in that moment. After the second burned meal he had been banned from cooking and they were living exclusively from takeout now, though it wasn’t as if that had never happened before.

Ryosuke could tell that his brother was doubting himself. He wouldn’t admit it, but it was quite obvious that he was having second thoughts. It was true, the decision to confront Takumi had been a great risk and he was sure that Keisuke knew it as well. Ryosuke would be lying if he said that he wasn’t thinking about whether this was the right choice most of the time. He had troubles concentrating and the first people started to notice, but he couldn’t even bring himself to care. His mind kept wandering back to what had happened the first time he had found himself in a scenario like this, and he kept comparing what had happened back then to his current situation.

What would Takumi do, caught between the two of them as he was? 

Ryosuke knew that his mind was stronger than Kaori’s had been, and there was no family to pressure him into a relationship he didn’t really want. Not as far as Ryosuke knew, at least. Takumi only had his father who, judging by the talk they had, wasn’t interested in whether his son would choose to marry or not. His mother’s whereabouts were unknown to Ryosuke, but if he guessed by the photographs and family portraits he had seen on his brief visit, he had a very good assumption. Fujiwara Bunta didn’t seem like the kind of person who would put a small candle in front of the portrait of a woman that he merely divorced.

Ryosuke remembered how he had to look away from the little display because it seemed like something so private that he shouldn’t have laid eyes on it in the first place.  
He wondered if Takumi remembered his mother fondly. 

Were there even any memories at all? Did he-

With a heavy sigh, Ryosuke abandoned that particular train of thought. This wasn’t something that he had any right to meddle with. Still, his thoughts kept drifting back to the Fujiwara family. More precisely, Fujiwara Takumi. 

He stared at the telephone again. Waiting was torturous. His mind kept trying to convince itself that the next news he’d hear would be bad ones. He absentmindedly fiddled with a ballpoint pen that lay around on his desk, the half-finished essay on his notebook not forgotten, but every thought about it suppressed. That had time.

Time.

How much time would Takumi need? The longer Ryosuke had to wait, the more he was convinced that he was waiting for a No and the realisation that he would have to live with that. 

“Shit,” he murmured under his breath. It felt cathartic. No wonder Keisuke had practically repeated the word like a mantra the evening after Takumi had left.

It was somehow funny, Ryosuke thought, how empty this house suddenly felt again. It had been comfortable to have Takumi staying here. Keisuke seemed to feel the emptiness even more, judging by how often his car was gone from its usual spot when Ryosuke returned from university. 

Ryosuke was so lost in thought that he flinched violently and dropped the pen on the floor when his telephone suddenly started ringing. He cursed and bent down to pick up the pen but glanced at the phone screen during the movement.

He immediately stopped what he was doing and hastily reached for the phone instead. The pen could wait. 

He accepted the call with a speed as if his conversation partner would be gone if he pressed the button a fraction of a second too late. “Yes?”, he asked breathily.

“Hello,” the voice on the other end of the line answered. It sounded hesitant. Timid.

“Takumi,” Ryosuke said and leaned back in his chair, exhaling a deep breath. “How are you? Have your feet fully healed by now?”

“What?” Takumi sounded confused for a moment. “Oh. Yeah. Yeah, they have. Everything else is fine, too.”

“I’m glad to hear that.”

Silence on the other end of the line. Ryosuke was about to ask if Takumi was still there, but the latter beat him to it.

“Listen, I don’t want to talk around the issue right now,” he said quickly. “I have made a decision. That’s why I’m calling. But, uh, you probably already guessed that.”

Ryosuke felt his hand clench around the phone. “Yes. That’s what I already assumed.”

Another short pause. Ryosuke closed his eyes. Was Takumi trying to kill him? He never thought that the younger would have such a flair for the dramatic. Or maybe he was just hesitating to deliver the news. 

“Please tell me then, Takumi.”

“…I’ve decided that I want to give that whole… thing… a try.”

Ryosuke let out a breath he didn’t realise he was holding. “Takumi?”

“I mean… I really do have feelings for both of you. And if you say we can make it work, then maybe…” He trailed off after that. 

“…I hope you aren’t just trying to convince yourself that you want this,” Ryosuke said after a pause.

“No, I’m not.” Takumi’s answer came immediately, and his voice sounded a lot firmer now than at the beginning of the call. “I know for sure that I want to try this. I’ve thought about this for a week. My answer won’t change again very soon.”

“I have a condition though,” he added before Ryosuke could say anything else.

“What is that condition?”

Takumi’s voice remained very steady. “Don’t you _dare_ make this some sort of contest.”

Ryosuke couldn’t help it, he had to laugh. The tenseness fell off his shoulders just like that, and there was nothing that could keep his amused reaction from bubbling out. “I promise,” he said, smile clearly audible in his voice.

Takumi chuckled, too. “Good. Now I need to hear the same from Keisuke. Let me talk to him,” he demanded. 

“Of course,” Ryosuke said. He hadn’t missed the way Takumi had said his brother’s name without attaching the familiar honorific. He got up from his chair immediately, opened the door to the hallway with a bit more force than necessary, and walked faster than usual towards the living room where he knew Keisuke was watching a movie right now.  
Telephone still held to his ear, he snatched the remote control from the couch table and paused the movie flickering across the screen.

“Oi!”, Keisuke complained and sprang to life, but Ryosuke only held the telephone out to him. “It’s Takumi,” he said in response to his brother’s questioning look.

And smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah. As mentioned in my last end note, this was hell to write. I just hope I was able to properly wrap things up. The most difficult thing is always trying to keep everyone in character. Characterisation is always the one thing I try to pay the most attention to, because to me it's the most important part. I'm not sure if I was able to properly balance everything.
> 
> But this is still not the last chapter, so I'll save my commentary on some choices for the next one. Prepare for one hella long end note!


	23. Epilogue

Takumi yawned quietly. Two weeks since he had started working at the moving company again and he had almost forgotten already what it was like to sleep in on weekdays. Not that he minded much, because at least his job didn’t give him room for boredom. Even though his boss and co-workers occasionally still treated him like they were worried that he would immediately break his spine once he tried to lift something even just remotely heavy, which was mildly annoying. Either way, being back at work made the free afternoons all that more enjoyable.

_Especially_ when he spent them in company.

Currently, ‘company’ meant that he was half-draped across Keisuke, who had refused to move over on the sofa and then had to deal with Takumi just laying down atop of him. Even though he had complained a bit, he didn’t actually seem to mind it that much given the fact that neither of them had moved for almost an hour, both absorbed in the magazines they were reading. Now however Keisuke stirred a bit, being alerted by Takumi’s yawn. 

“Tired?”, he asked, and Takumi rolled his eyes.

“No. Of course not,” he answered drily and then promptly had to yawn a second time. 

Keisuke closed his magazine and threw it on the couch table, where it skidded across the glass surface from the momentum and almost fell down on the other side. Keisuke didn’t appear to notice, or he simply didn’t care.

“Not too tired to be sarcastic, apparently.” Keisuke chuckled and Takumi wanted to throw another dry remark at him, but his boyfriend chose this moment to sit up and pretty much pull him into a sitting position in his lap. “Don’t fall asleep on me. Aniki will be home soon.” 

Takumi glanced at the clock. Keisuke was right, but he still wouldn’t have minded lying there for a few more minutes. He leaned forward to put his magazine away as well (carefully), because he was pretty certain that Keisuke wouldn’t let him read in peace anymore now that they had moved. He was right.

Keisuke wrapped his arms around him and pulled him back. Takumi chose to say nothing this time and let his head fall back against his boyfriend’s chest, almost tempted to close his eyes. Fortunately (or unfortunately?) Keisuke chose this moment to readjust their positions again and start to trail little kisses down Takumi’s neck. Takumi shivered involuntarily. 

“Is that an attempt to keep me awake?”, he complained and tried to keep the other from noticing how his actions affected him. Keisuke chuckled lowly and leaned his head forward so his chin was resting on Takumi’s shoulder. “Maybe,” he murmured, and Takumi could hear the smile in his voice. The warm breath against his neck didn’t exactly help to quell the heat that was rising to his face and… elsewhere. 

“But you do keep in mind that it’s almost dinner time, right?”

“No time to sleep, either!”, Keisuke retorted, though he sounded a bit pouty. 

Takumi didn’t feel the need to say anything else when he heard the sound of the front door being unlocked. Keisuke sighed.

“Damn. For once I almost wished he would be late.” 

Takumi laughed. “I’m here for the rest of the weekend.”

“Right.” The amused smile in Keisuke’s voice was back, and Takumi almost laughed again at how predictable he was.

“I’m home,” Ryosuke’s voice called from the hallway, and a moment later the owner of said voice stuck his head into the living room. He took one look at the position they sat in, Keisuke’s chin still resting on Takumi’s shoulder, and started smiling. 

Takumi shook Keisuke’s arms off and sat up. “Welcome home.”

“Oh, don’t let me disturb you,” Ryosuke said while his smile evolved into something more like a smirk. 

“Nothing I’d rather do, but I have to admit I’m getting hungry.” Keisuke sighed and poked Takumi’s side to prompt him to stand up. Takumi obliged, but not without turning around to steal a deep kiss from Keisuke before the latter even had the chance to get up. 

After only two seconds, however, Takumi quickly pulled back with a mildly disgusted look on his face. 

“Ew. You taste like cigarettes.”

“Oh, come on!”, Keisuke whined. He looked at his brother in a beseeching manner. “Aniki!”

Ryosuke only laughed at him. “Shouldn’t you know better by now?”

Keisuke pouted. No matter how often Takumi saw that look on his face, he still found it hilarious. He snickered quietly, but both brothers heard him. 

“Fine,” grumbled Keisuke, looking insulted, “If everyone here’s against me, I’m just gonna leave.” 

“Aw, don’t leave,” Ryosuke said teasingly. His brother shot him a dirty look.

“I told you not to mess with the one cooking the food,” he muttered.

“I could cook, too,” Takumi offered and managed exactly two steps towards the kitchen before Keisuke pushed past him.

“No way. You’re still the guest.”

Takumi rolled his eyes. “Isn’t that getting a bit old right now?” Then he grinned. “Or maybe you just don’t want to have to admit that I’m the better cook?”

“Shut up, Fujiwara.” 

“He’s right,” remarked Ryosuke, who looked like he was thoroughly enjoying the spectacle. 

“ _Both of you_ shut up.” 

Takumi and Ryosuke looked at each other and tried not to start laughing when Keisuke disappeared into the kitchen, muttering something to himself that Takumi had the feeling included the word ‘assholes’ somewhere. As far as he knew Keisuke, he wasn’t actually that insulted and only acted like a pouting child out of principle. Takumi didn’t feel very sorry about teasing him either way because Keisuke had obviously broken his promise to finally quit smoking. He would have at least liked a warning, because _ew_. That taste was something that he would never get used to, and he didn’t want to get used to it either. 

The sound of Ryosuke’s voice reminded him that they were both still standing around in the living room. “Do I get a welcome kiss?”, the elder brother asked, still with that amused spark in his eyes. 

Takumi didn’t give him a verbal answer and simply gave him a peck on the lips. “That’s all for now,” he said. “Let’s follow Keisuke and make sure that he doesn’t burn our food out of spite.”

Ryosuke chuckled. “You’re joking, but he has actually done that to me once. To be fair, I was a real asshole towards him that day.”

“You need to tell me the full story one day.”

“I’d rather not,” Ryosuke said and grimaced, but Takumi could see that he was joking as well. 

It was baffling, really. Had he told his past self that he would one day light-heartedly joke around with Takahashi Ryosuke, he would have denounced himself an idiot. But he had fallen into this routine quite easily, and it was really surprising how well their connection functioned. Not only with Ryosuke, but with Keisuke as well. They were still a bit in the phase of figuring everything out, but it seemed like it was really working. Takumi had had his doubts, but when he looked at their situation now, he was glad that he had decided to try having this relationship.

_Especially_ with the way Ryosuke was looking at him now. “Do you know how glad I am that you’re here?”, he asked him quietly, and the soft smile on his face was chasing up the butterflies in Takumi’s stomach. 

“No, I don’t,” he said, “but you could show me.”

Before Ryosuke got the chance to, however, a loud voice coming from the kitchen interrupted them. 

“Oi, you lovebirds! Come here! I’m nearly done!”

“He’s got to have some sort of instinct for this,” Ryosuke grumbled, and Takumi laughed. “Probably.”

Shaking his head, Ryosuke gave him another fond smile. “Well then. Let’s see if our dinner can still be saved.” 

Takumi nodded, and followed his boyfriend out of the living room. What the three of them had was definitely weird. Unorthodox. Not the norm. And hell, he still had no clue how to explain it to his dad, if he didn’t already suspect anything. Or to his friends, who definitely didn’t suspect anything.

But right now? Right now, none of that mattered. Right now, the only thing that mattered was every single moment he got to spend with the ones he loved.

And he swore to himself he would make the most out of it.

~~~ **END** ~~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And with that, I call this story finished! It's been an amazing time writing this! This is, in fact, the very first multichapter fanfiction I have been able to finish! I definitely wouldn't have been able to do it without you readers and your amazing encouragement! I really hoped that you were able to enjoy this fanfiction, because I enjoyed writing it (well, mostly.) 
> 
> There were some plot points that I ended up scrapping because I didn't want to drag everything out even longer, but you should know that:
> 
> -Takumi definitely ended up punching at least one of the assholes that attacked him
> 
> -Bunta had his suspicions for a long time already and isn't surprised at all when Takumi finally comes around to sheepishly introduce the brothers as his boyfriends
> 
> -This dialogue which I wanted so badly to include but which ended up not fitting anywhere:
> 
> “I mean, carnations? You could’ve just as well gone with red roses, jeez…”
> 
>   _'If only you knew…'_
> 
> -The fact that I planned to include a lot more Takahashi Family Drama and had an entire timeline worked out for that backstory, but didn't end up using it and so there are only some hints of it in the story
> 
> -I still don't like that summary, but it's unlikely that I ever think of a better one
> 
> -Literally SO MUCH ANGST that I can now use for other fanfictions, hehe
> 
> -I have so many plans
> 
> -And So many quotes left that I didn't end up using
> 
> (Does everyone feel like this after finishing a long fanfiction? I know why I usually write one-shots.)
> 
> With that, a grateful goodbye to all of you! I will return! _Soon..._


End file.
